Posted in birthday, Christmas, Family, friends, gratitude, Holidays, life, New Year, Scripture

Happy Birthday!

 “The heavens proclaim the glory of God. The skies display his craftsmanship.” Psalm 19:1

Here we are again. It seems like yesterday I was celebrating my 70th birthday and today…well it’s number 71st! It’s funny how quickly these things sneak up, right? They say age is just a number, and a birthday is just a date on the calendar, but the number keeps getting bigger, and that date seems to come around way too fast.

I’ve always thought birthdays were cool, even though mine’s right after Christmas. Growing up, it was always special when friends and family remembered it. I mean, it’s easy to forget when everyone’s still in Christmas mode.

Turns out, my birthday actually falls on a pretty special day. Way back in the day (like, really back), January 6th was when people celebrated Christmas. So technically, I was born on Christmas Day! Then, a pope came along and decided to change it, so… goodbye Christmas. But hey, I still get to claim that cool little connection. Also, January 6th is known as Epiphany, when the three wise men, led by a brilliant star,  supposedly visited Jesus. Honestly, we’re not even sure there were three of them, and the Bible hints that they didn’t show up until a couple of years later. But whatever—it still makes my birthday feel extra special!

So, we just wrapped up Christmas—the time time when we celebrate Jesus’ birth. But here’s the thing—sometimes, even His birthday gets lost in the shuffle. With all the hustle, the shopping, the family gatherings, and traditions (which I do love, by the way), it’s easy to forget the real reason we’re celebrating. Same thing happens at Easter, too. And honestly, in a world moving at “500 mph,” we can easily let this happen every day. As Jesus followers, we’ve got to make sure He stays front and center, not just at Christmas, but all year long.

Anyway, this isn’t really about my birthday. (Okay, maybe a little bit, but not really.) It’s more about remembering Jesus—keeping Him at the forefront of our minds and hearts. It’s about making sure He gets the attention He deserves, Christmas or not. So next time you look up at the stars, think about that bright one that announced His birth over 2,000 years ago. Psalm 19:1 says, “The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of His hands.”

Sure, we put candles on a cake, but God lit up the whole sky with stars, and created everything we see. Pretty amazing, huh? So even though Christmas is behind us, let’s keep Jesus at the front of everything. No matter what we face, it’s great to know that “He’s got this.” Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Christmas, Family, friends, life, New Year, thankful, wisdom

Time–Our Treasure

 “Lord, You have been our refuge in every generation. Before the mountains were born, before You gave birth to the earth and the world, from eternity to eternity, You are God.” Psalm 90:1-2 

I glanced back in the rearview mirror and watched it disappear, just like that Christmas came and went and so did another year.  It never ceases to amaze me how quickly time passes.  At one time there was a saying that said, “You are slower than Christmas.”  Well, at least for me that simply is not true anymore.  It seems like yesterday that we were talking about another new year, another new month, or another new week and now it is time to start it all over again.  Today marks the beginning of yet another another New Year. Amazing.

As you know Christmas occasionally falls on a Sunday. For most folks the day of the week Christmas arrives is not that big of a deal.  But as a used-to-be preacher-teacher it certainly was a big deal.  It was a definite shift to go from ho, ho, ho and opening presents to “Holy is the Lord” in a span of a couple of hours. It is almost like shifting a car from forward to reverse.  Christmas on Sunday normally occurs every six or seven years but guess what? Because of the way Leap Year falls next time, it will be nine years before we celebrate Christmas on a Sunday again.  Nine years.  For me, preacher or not, that means I will be knocking on eighty—loudly.  For some of you, it means your eleven year old son or daughter will be knocking on 18. Is that crazy or what?

The crazier part of all of this is that those nine years…if we get to see all of them…will pass so very quickly.  It is such a good reminder that we need to savor each day the Savior gives us.  We need to remember how precious every minute, hour, day, month, and year are.  The Bible has a lot to say about time and how we handle it. First, Moses tells us in Psalm 90, “Teach us to number our days carefully so that we may develop wisdom in our hearts.” That is such good counsel.  Like a cook carefully measures the ingredients in whatever they are preparing, so we need to carefully measure the value of each day. And when we do, if we do, we will discover the wisdom of the God of the ages.

Another great scripture is found in the New Testament of the Christian Bible.  Paul was writing to a group of Jesus people in Ephesus.  He said to them, “So be careful how you live. Don’t live like fools, but like those who are wise. Make the most of every opportunity in these evil days.”  Make the most or squeeze everything you can out of each day.  There are two things we need to remember about days. First, they all belong to the Lord…we are just managers and second, each day is a gift from Him.  No matter how difficult or how easy—each day is a present from Him to His children.  So, we should handle it with care and use it wisely.

Two of the things I love about God is His is generosity and wisdom.  He gives and guides and then helps us to make the most of every day…every gift.  As we look forward to our next installment of time—no matter how much or little we get to experience—always remember that there is One who is standing close just waiting to help us.  No matter what—He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Christmas, Family, friends, gratitude, heaven, life, loving others, Scripture

Memory Trees

 “You have turned my mourning into joyful dancing. You have taken away my clothes of mourning and clothed me with joy.” Psalm 30:11

Just a heads up. Christmas trees. They all have their own time to be setup. They all have their own design and style.  They all have their time when they are trashed or stowed.  There is a common denominator.  Those three things are determined by the creators, the admirers of the trees.  That is what makes every tree special. At our house, we do something just a bit different.  We have four trees that make a small, enchanted forest of sorts.  The tallest is about six foot and the smallest is about 30 inches.  It was an idea that I came up with several years ago and we love it.  They are decorated with a wide variety of ornaments and keepsakes from over the decades…and we love that too.

On one tree, we have a Styrofoam snowman’s head that was made by my sister when she was in the third grade…and trust me…that was a really, long time ago.  As I hung that snowman’s head this year there was the somber realization that she is in heaven this year. Merry Christmas in heaven, sis.There is a glitter covered cross from when my wife Judy was in the fourth grade.  Of course, there are three “baby’s first Christmas” ornaments—one for each of our daughters.  There is a 3×5 index card with two buttons on it.  Written, by my oldest granddaughter when she was about 5 years old, is her name over one button and Papa written over the other.  It is priceless.  We were buddies…we are buddies. And on and on it goes…families, friends, and special memories all gathered in one place.

So, by now you are wondering, “Why are you writing about Christmas trees after Christmas has passed?”  It’s a bit of a story. When we were in Germany in 1979, we lived in base housing.  They were large, four-story apartment buildings, with three stairwells—all full of military families.  We were on the top floor, and we had one neighbor across the hall, and they had a phone in their home.  One year, near Easter, I needed to use the phone, so I knocked on the door and his wife came to the door.  I asked if I could use their phone and she was kind enough to say yes.

As I entered their apartment, I noticed one thing right away.  Sitting in their living room was their Christmas tree in all its splendor.  Now, keep in mind it was right before Easter.  I made my call and just had to ask the obvious question.  I politely said, “So why do you still have your Christmas tree up?”  And, without missing a beat, she said, “It makes me happy.”  I never forgot that simple answer and the great truth it taught me.  It.Makes.Me.Happy.

I love the fact that this sweet lady decided to keep her tree up…not based on popular opinion, not on what the masses did, or what was “normal.”  She decided based on what was good for her—for her mental health.  I didn’t think her odd at all—rather, I thought her strong and wise.  I wonder how many decisions we make every day that are not based on what may be good for us but based on what the Smith’s or Jones’ might think of us? I wonder how many things we wear, or eat, or watch, or do, that are based on the opinion of others?  I wonder how many of our faith decisions are based on the same.  Church—no church. Kindness—no kindness. Love—no love. Jesus—no Jesus. Hmmmm. I just wonder.

One year we decided to leave our trees up for several weeks after Christmas and it was ok.  They had transformed from Christmas trees to memory trees.  Maybe, perhaps we will do that again this year. So, if you drive by 217 you might see a small, enchanted forest in our front bay window.  It will be four trees starting at about six feet tall and going down to 30 inches.  If you could get close enough, you would see the trees covered with special ornaments—and almost everyone would represent a special memory or event.  And why will they be there?  Well, it might just be a reminder that we have so much to be thankful for.

If we do leave our trees up, or at least until we take them down, we will drink coffee and do our Jesus things like reading the Bible or praying and occasionally we will look up and be happy—happy for all the blessings that God has sent our way.  Someone writing about God in His Book said that God had turned their mourning into joyful dancing. He had taken away their clothes of mourning and clothed them with joy. I couldn’t agree more.  Even in these different days, these different months, and years, we will have happy moments.  We will pause and thank God that in the past He always showed up and today and all the today’s yet to come He will do it again. After all, He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Christmas, Family, gratitude, Holidays, Scripture, thankful

Santa Claus Came to Town

 “But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:8 

It is one of my favorite Christmas memories and this is a story I have told before and most certainly will tell again. I wish I could tell you the lengths that my Daddy and Momma would go to make sure we had a wonderful Christmas.  Daddy had a good job, but with a bunch of kids, money was always tight.  If I were guessing, we were probably at the bottom of the middle class.  But somehow, they always managed to make sure every Christmas was a fairytale. One year stands out.

I was in the sixth grade and by now I had moved into the world of “nonbelievers”—if you get my drift.  I remember the year Momma told me I could stay up later with the adults.  I guess you could say I graduated.  That night, we visited, talked, and ate.  I’m sure Momma and some of the girls were in the kitchen preparing for Christmas Day.  At about 11:00 pm, I remember Momma telling me that perhaps I should go ahead and go to bed.  “Maybe,” she said, “Santa Claus might still be coming to town.”  Ho, Ho, Ho.

Since it was so late, I didn’t put up much of a fuss.  I never was much of a person to stay up late—until I started dating that is.  Smile.  So, off to bed I went.  There were no visions of sugar drops dancing in my head—like I said, I was a “non-believer”.  Our house was an old, former World War II barracks and was long and narrow.  At one end was the kitchen, then a small dining room, next a living room with the bathroom and two small bedrooms, a breezeway and finally a garage turned bedroom.  That is where I slept.

The next morning, sometime early, I got up.  I’m not sure if someone woke me up or it was just time.  I wandered through the breezeway into the living room where several of the family were sitting.  I backed up to the old two-burner oil stove and warmed up a little. After just a few minutes, Daddy said, “Dewayne, go get me a cup of coffee.”  Coffee was a big deal around the Taylor house, so it certainly was not an unusual request.  I lingered just a moment more, savoring the warmth of the stove before heading to the kitchen.

As I left the living room and entered the dining room, I almost stumbled on something.  There parked right in the middle of the walkway to the kitchen was the most incredible red, English-racer bicycle you have ever seen.  Now, keep in mind, this was back when bikes were all the rage—unlike today when if it doesn’t have batteries or require electricity, it’s not even worth mentioning.  It was beautiful. The frame was bright, metallic red, the fenders were chrome, it had three speeds, hand brakes and, wait for it, a generator light.

I was amazed.  Not in all my years could I have ever imagined such an extravagant gift. Somewhere there is a home video that my brother shot of the grand moment.  I was like someone who had just won the lottery—and from my perspective—I had.  I petted it, hugged every one I could find, threw on some clothes and went off into the darkness with my new English racer.  And that generator light—oh yes, it lit the way.  And if that wasn’t enough, keep in mind this was in North Florida, it was warm enough to ride—even early in the morning.

Like I said, my parents went way out of their way to gift us at Christmas.  Things might have been lean during the year but at Christmas, they pulled out the stops.  I had an idea how they did it.  Saving was not practical on such a limited budget, but they would get one of those loans from a finance company and then pay it off throughout the year.  It was so sacrificial.  I know I have many things to be grateful for from my parents, but the lengths they went to, so we could have Christmas, touches my heart to this day.  I know it probably didn’t make financial sense, but they loved us that much.

I have another parent who did something that didn’t make sense either…and it involved Christmas and Easter. That would be my Heavenly Father. Knowing the world needed a rescue, a redemption, He sent His only Son into this broken world as a baby just so He could grow up and then give Himself to a Roman cross—just for us.  Paul, the guy God used to write a bunch of the New Testament, said it this way, “But God demonstrated His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” While we were still broken, still messed up, unloving and unappreciative, Jesus died for us.  Nope, it made no sense but that is what I love about God.  I know sometimes He allows things that I don’t understand…like when I pray for someone to be healed and it just doesn’t work out like I want. But to know that He loved me enough to create Christmas and Easter—well, that’s just amazing.

Remember this Christmas day, to be grateful for the sacrifices made on your behalf by the people who touch our lives. I know for some that might be difficult.  But try and find the good that is lurking somewhere out there.  But first of all and most of all, be sure and thank God for the greatest gift ever—His own Son and His sacrifice, that we can be forgiven and look forward to being in heaven one day.  Of course, having God as your Dearest Daddy means you get the Gift that keeps on giving.  He walks with us every day and through everything, side by side, hand in hand, and we have the grand assurance that no matter what—He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Christmas, Family, Grace, gratitude, Holidays, life, love, Scripture, sovereignty of God, thankful

A Downtown Christmas

 “I pray that you, being rooted and firmly established in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the length and width, height and depth of God’s love.” – Ephesians 3:17b-18

Looking back, my childhood Christmases were always special. We didn’t have a lot of extras, but we had enough—and we had each other. Christmas season always felt like a time of magic, starting with the rich traditions that led up to the big day. A few weeks before Christmas, we’d pull the decorations down from the attic and start filling the house with Christmas cheer. I remember a special Santa decoration that hung on our chimney, and the best part? I actually found one exactly like it! These days, he hangs in my office, but during December, you’ll find him glowing proudly in my kitchen, keeping an eye on me all year round to make sure I stay on the nice list.

But one of my absolute favorite Christmas memories? The trips we made downtown to pay our electric bill. Sounds strange, right? What do electric bills and Christmas have to do with each other? Well, with a tight budget, paying the bill on time was a non-negotiable. So, a day or two before it was due, we’d make the trip to downtown Jacksonville to drop off the payment. Nothing glamorous, but it was a part of the season. And here’s the twist—it was actually really special.

You see, back in those days, the department stores in downtown Jacksonville would go all out with their Christmas window displays. We’re talking moving figures, reindeer that looked like they were about to take flight, and kids skating on a magical, frosty lake. It was a full-blown Christmas wonderland—magical in a way that only the holidays can be. Especially as a kid, I could feel the Christmas spirit in those windows.

Now, here’s the kicker: If we hadn’t had that electric bill to pay, we probably wouldn’t have taken that little trip downtown at all. And that, my friends, feels like a perfect example of how God works. Sometimes, He leads us to unexpected places, through things we might not understand at the time, but they turn out to be exactly what we needed. We just don’t always see it in the moment.

God has this way of using even the little bumps in the road to bring something good into our lives. He works in mysterious ways, sometimes out front, sometimes behind the scenes. We don’t always recognize it at first, but when we do, we’re often amazed at how He’s been shaping our lives all along. If we can be patient and trust in His timing, we start to see how those seemingly random things in life were part of His bigger plan all along.

And you know what? I think that’s one of the best things about heaven—it’ll be full of surprises. We’ll finally understand all the things God saved us from, the opportunities He put in our path that we just thought were coincidences, and the many ways He’s been at work, even when we didn’t realize it.

Paul, the guy who wrote so much of the New Testament, said it best when he wrote: “I pray that you, being rooted and firmly established in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the length and width, height and depth of God’s love.” Honestly, that’s one prayer we may never fully see answered—His love is just that vast.

So, as we celebrate Christmas, let’s take a moment to really look for the ways God is working in our lives. Some things will leave us filled with gratitude, and others may make us just stop and think, “Wow, He’s got this.”—Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Christmas, Family, friends, gratitude, life, loving others, thankful, Thanksgiving

The Brothers

 “Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are My disciples.” John 13:35

I have a big catalog of special blessings. You see, one of the things that blessed me through my years of pastoring were the hundreds of times people blessed us. Sometimes it was a big thing and sometimes it was a small thing. As it turns out, one of my favorites was ginormous to me but not so ginormous to the guys involved.

It was around Thanksgiving and that year on the Saturday after the big day we had our family celebration at my daughter’s house outside of Murray, Kentucky.  My wife and I went down Friday, spent the night and enjoyed some good family time.  The rest of the tribe joined us Saturday for a great meal and more family stuff.  It was a cold day and about mid-afternoon it was time to head home.  We had church the next day and there was a full night of preparation waiting for us. So, we headed north.  When we got home, I turned up the furnace (I had turned it down to save the planet and a few bucks) and started unloading the car.  After about thirty-minutes or so it occurred to me that the house wasn’t getting any warmer. Hmmmm.

I went downstairs and our furnace was stone, cold dead.  It was strange because the breaker had flipped. I called one of the brothers in our church who knew about boilers…in fact, he had helped me before when I had some trouble.  Our boiler is older than our first born so…well, you know.  Since it was Saturday evening I just called for some advice.  He gave some. Since it sounded electrical, he suggested I start with an electrician. That sounded like good advice, so I thanked him.

I called another brother in the church (we have a lot of brothers in the church) who knew about electrical stuff (which appeared to be the problem) and asked if he could maybe come by Sunday afternoon and take a look.  He refused.  He said it couldn’t wait till then and volunteered to come as soon as he finished supper. I thanked him and also thanked God for brothers to call when there is a need.  In just a few minutes the doorbell rang.  I assumed it was the electrical brother but in fact it was the boiler brother.  Before long, the other brother showed up too.  So, on a cold Saturday night, two brothers came to try and make sure Judy and I weren’t cold that night.  

Working together they found a short in the control box and within an hour the furnace was up and running. That night Judy and I slept warm because two brothers were willing to help another brother in a time of need.  I was pretty overwhelmed.  I said to them, “Thank you for loving us.”  The boiler brother said, “How do you know we love you?”  And the answer was simple truth.  I said, “Because of your actions.” I believe God allowed our furnace to fail so He could send two brothers over to say, “I love you.”  Isn’t that just like our Dearest Daddy?  I think it is.

The Bible says people will know we are Christians by our love.  Love is a great noun, but it is an even more powerful verb.  Compassion is love in action.  God demonstrated that by sending His Son to die on a Roman cross.  These two men, on a Saturday night, demonstrated it by coming and doing.  I believe the one quality that must be evident in a church is love.   We need to love God and we need to love each other.  God has made it clear that nothing will come between Him and us.  We must make sure that nothing Satan throws out today comes between brothers and sisters.

This season we talk a lot about how amazing it was that God could ask a young virgin girl to be the mother of Jesus.  She couldn’t understand how that could happen.  An angel simply said, “With God nothing is impossible.” We wonder how we can love when we disagree, when we are hurt, when we are being pulled in opposite directions.  The answer is simple…everything is possible with God.  Judy and I rested good that night with a warm house and a heart warmed by love…both His and theirs.  It reminded me fresh and anew that He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, Grace, gratitude, life, Scripture, sovereignty of God, thankful

Amazing Grace

 “Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. But even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows.” Matthew 10:29-30

 It’s worth telling again. In the early days of Grits, before the Grits Facebook page and before the website, I wrote a story about something that happened on a Friday. And trust me…it was pretty amazing.  You see, I’m one of those people who believe that God is always working.  And on that particular day, I think He looked down from heaven and decided I was going to need a little extra help.  It goes like this.

So, it was Friday and my wife Judy tricked me into some really laborious yard work.  I kinda volunteered to rebuild a flower bed and ended up being drafted to build a sidewalk next to the flower bed.  It involved moving and setting 28 of those 16 by 16 concrete paving things and 15 of those blocks that you use to build a wall.  Well, several hours later we had a sidewalk and a small wall with a new flower bed.  It looks awesome.  She was tired…I was exhausted.

I showered up, sat on the couch for a while and then decided I needed to pick up the garage.  Our nightly vacation rental property is over our garage and due to a lack of storage space there were several containers of winter decorations from there that had taken up residence.  Either the car or the containers had to go.  I voted for the containers.

So, I pulled both cars out of the garages (yes garages…we have two…go figure.) In the smaller garage where my car is parked there is a storage shelf–an obvious new home for the stuff that Judy had put in the other garage.  Well, to make a long story shorter I started rearranging the shelf to make room for the stuff.  Finally, I began to move the heavy containers and I began to mutter.  It went like this, “I’m too tired to be messing with this stuff. I didn’t create the mess so why am I having to fix it.”  Honestly, I got just a little mad.

So, I finally got everything where it would now live but there were three winter doormats still on the floor.  I picked them up and carried them to the basement in our house.  I came out to finish and close up shop.  As I looked in my garage–there it was.  I had a tool rack mounted on the wall.  It held rakes, shovels, brooms, clippers…you name it. It was seven feet long and heavy. I hadn’t touched it but there it was on the garage floor–all of it. It didn’t fall down–it fell out–right where my car would have been if it had been in the garage.  Trust me it would have left more than a few small scratches.  We are talking “lions and tigers and bears–oh my.”

So, my first thought was what in the world happened? Well obviously, the wall anchors holding the rack had failed.  But my second thought–literally–was my car wasn’t in the garage for one reason–I had cleaned up Judy’s mess.  If I hadn’t done that–it would have been, well, never mind.  Now I drive a five-year-old vehicle by choice, but I have always tried to take care of our vehicles.  I figured if I am going to drive an older car it might as well look good.

So, I am amazed–not that I got the garage picked up; not that the thing with the tools fell off the wall, but that my Father carefully orchestrated a series of events to make sure my car wasn’t in the way.  “Dewayne, do you really think that God cares about such things?”  No…I don’t think…I know.  And that’s not all. I am certain that when I finally get to heaven, I am going to be amazed at the things He did that I didn’t even know about.

Now I know we continue to be frustrated and maybe even discouraged about the events that surround us. Just remember what Jesus said in Matthew 10:29-30 “Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. But even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows.”

Fear not.  Hey, crazy world…fear not. Hey, uncertain future…fear not. Watch out new normalcy…fear not. Higher gas prices…fear not.  Remember, if you know Jesus then God knows you.  You can call Him Dearest Father and He calls you His child. Trust me, you are of more value to Him than many sparrows. So, rest in Him.  He can move cars and mountains. He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, Scripture, Southern born, Trials, wisdom

Time for a Switch

 “No discipline seems enjoyable at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.”  Hebrews 12:11

 I guess I just got bored.  When I was growing up in North Florida it was just easy to get bored.  It was a different time.  There was no internet, no satellite or cable television, and no electronic games.  Then, you have to add to that there just weren’t a lot of toys to play with.  While Daddy and Momma loaded us up at Christmas, by summer a lot of them had suffered from rough play. So, you had to get a little creative!  And that’s when I got into trouble.

One of my favorite things was to make rubber band guns.  It was really quite easy.  They were building houses across the street from where we lived (slowly our place in the country was becoming suburban). Like at any construction site there were lots of wedge shaped sticks sticking out of the ground.  I later learned they were surveyor sticks.  Oops. Anyway, they had lots and I needed one, every once in a while, so I would, uh, borrow one…or two.  Well, Momma had the local newspaper delivered to our house so we got a paper every day and it came wrapped with a rubber band.  You simply collect a few rubber bands (they were discarded in the yard), drive a nail in your stick and tada…you had a rubber band gun.  See…creative.

Well, that was bound to get old, so I came up with another idea.  In North Florida, the soil (at least where we lived) was very sandy.  I discovered that if you take a water hose and start forcing it against the sandy soil it will act like a drill.  As the water forced the sand away, the hose would slowly sink into the sand.  Well, it was fun. Before I knew it, the hose was a foot in the ground, then it was two, and then it was three and it was just about then I wondered how I would get it out.  So, I gave it a tug.  It didn’t budge.  I gave it a pull—nope, it didn’t give an inch.  I was in trouble.

What happened next is lost to time and history, but one of two things happened.  Number one.  I left the hose stuck in the ground.  Daddy came home and wanted to water his rose bushes.  He found the hose stuck in the ground, asked me and I told the truth, and I was sent to the bamboo bushes to get my own instrument of correction.  Think a thin bamboo switch.  It was effective…every time.  Number two.  I realized that the hose was stuck in the ground and I realized that Daddy would be coming home soon, and he would water his rose bushes.  So, I went in the house and got a knife and cut off the hose.  The end result was the same. He asked, I told, bamboo switch. By the way…another sign that times have changed.  I looked up switch and was told it turned electricity off and on and was an electronic game that kids play.  Mine was neither.

You know, I really didn’t intend to mess up the construction site across from my house and I really didn’t mean to get my Daddy’s hose stuck in the sand.  The truth was I was just naive.  But there is another truth.  My being naive didn’t change the fact that I shouldn’t have done what I did and in the case of my Daddy’s hose—it didn’t change the consequences.  You might be asking, “Did your Daddy really give you a “switching?”  And the answer is yes.  You might ask, “Do you think you deserved the “switching?”  The answer is yes.  Finally, you might ask, “Did you learn anything from the “switching?” And the answer is yes.

You see, I never, ever again, turned on the water and let the water hose get stuck in the ground.  I don’t believe I was ever even tempted to let the water hose get stuck in the ground. You see, the “switching” was not an act of anger or meanness, it was an act of love.  Daddy was teaching me about right and wrong and I am grateful for that.  Daddy had several ways to discipline and they were generally fair and not too harsh.  And I believe they worked because I’ve never been arrested or spent a night in jail—yet. Overall I am a compliant person but part of that might be because my Daddy (and Momma) cared enough to help me learn.

I never really bought into the thought that the “switching” hurt my Daddy more than me because I know it hurt pretty bad.  But I do know he didn’t enjoy it.  My Heavenly Father doesn’t enjoy it either and He loves me even more than my earthly Daddy. God’s Book, the Bible, says that no discipline seems enjoyable at the time, but painful. Well, that is the truth. But is also says that later on it yields a kind of fruit—the kind that teaches us right from wrong.  And that is profitable.

So, the lessons for today?  Don’t pull up surveyor sticks and don’t stick your Daddy’s hose in the dirt and above all…remember that your Father up in heaven loves you. In fact, He loves you enough to allow hard things in your life to help you learn right from wrong…to make better decisions with fewer consequences and regrets.  And don’t worry…He is loving and patient.  He never over reacts but rather responds in just the right way.  And as always, He’s got even this. Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Christmas, communication, Family, forgiveness, loving others, school days, Scripture

Gifts and Lizards

“Love keeps no record of wrongs.” 1 Corinthians 13:5b

 It was a lizard but when you’re eight—it’s a dinosaur.  Growing up in North Florida, which is a somewhat, semi-tropical area, there were always all kinds of insects and reptiles to watch or capture.  One of these was a small lizard…a sort of dinosaur in miniature.  It seemed they were everywhere.  Sometimes they were brown and sometimes they were green but always they stirred my imagination and when that happened, they were always bigger and more vicious than they were in reality. But it is amazing what an eight-year-old mind can come up with when he has too much time on his hands. I know I captured more than a few…usually by grabbing them by their tail.  I was always amazed when their tail broke off and while he managed to scurry away, his tail remained…still wiggling.  I later learned that their tail would slowly grow back and I guess I’m glad they did.

As I grew older, it seems the lizards got smaller and soon became a sense of novelty and nothing more. Gone was the fear of what they could do to me as I realized what I could do to them.  I’ve found out that not only applies to lizards but memories from days gone by. About the time I was a chasing lizards and yet being a little fearful…something happened.  It was Christmas time and as the day approached, I knew I didn’t have anything to give to my Momma. Poking around the house, I discovered a plastic flower arrangement sitting in the corner of the breezeway that connected our house and a garage turned into a bedroom.  Partly out of desperation and party through the eyes of an eight-year-old, I decided I would wrap the well-worn and faded flowers and give them to my Momma for Christmas.  So, I put them in a box, wrapped it all up and put it under the tree.

Christmas morning came and as was tradition, we all gathered in the living room as the presents were handed out and I watched as Momma was handed the box and unwrapped it.  Probably speaking to no one in particular, I heard her say, “Well, these are those flowers from the porch.” I was devastated. I knew it wasn’t much but I was hoping that something ordinary would be magically transformed by Christmas.  Now, let’s be clear.  Momma wasn’t being mean or hurtful.  Her words that day were just a statement of fact, and she might probably was not aware I had heard them…but I had…and a scar was born.

For years and years, I carried those words in my heart…and with them came the rejection that only an insecure eight-year-old can feel.  A few words casually spoken left a wound that for years refused to heal.  Listen, I know my Momma and I know she loved me but sometimes the best of us can utter words that get stuck in our memories and like those lizards…seem to grow into monsters.  Probably all of us have them…probably all of us have said them…probably all of us regret saying them.

I can’t remember if I ever told Momma about that Christmas and those words, but I can tell you it is no longer a deal.  Yes, there is a small scar on my heart, but that scar reminds me of something important.  Scars are wounds that have healed.  As I grew older, I was able to let go of the hurt because I grew to understand that no matter what words she spoke that day, her actions over the years more than proved her love.  If nothing else, those words remind me that she wasn’t perfect…just like me, just like you and just like the last person who wounded us.

Remember this.   Christmas is about love and love is about forgiveness.  My favorite verse in 1 Corinthians 13 reminds me that “love keeps no record of wrongs.”  It turns out that love makes choices possible.  We get to choose what to do with the things that are tossed into our laps.  We get to choose what we do when someone else’s mess gets sloshed on us.  I’ve learned I can’t control others; I can’t always control the circumstances around me; but I can always control my response…and that is important.

So about sixty Christmas’s have come and gone.  Momma is long in heaven, and I am grateful that I can sit and click keys on my keyboard and smile at all the precious memories I treasure in my heart.  And some of those memories that used to be dragons are now simply little lizards.  In case you are wondering how that works…well once you’ve experienced God’s grace and His forgiveness…it is a no brainer.  After all, He’s got this. Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, forgiveness, Grace, gratitude, life, Scripture, thankful

Peanuts and Grace

 “Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” Hebrews 4:16

I think you really don’t appreciate grace until you really need it. It was probably around 1984. I was a young pastor squeaking by on a salary of $12,000 a year and trust me that was lean times. There was no health insurance or any other benefits. With that said, my wife Judy and I decided to load our two kids up in our car and drive to Kansas City to the mall there. It was only about 45 minutes and would be a cheap outing—almost.

Well, we soon found ourselves in the Sears and Roebuck store at Independence Mall. We also found ourselves in the part of the store where they sell things that taste good and things that break. The taste good part was the candy department. For those of you who missed this great part of life, Sears actually had a place where you could buy candy by the pound.  They also happened to sale the best double-dipped chocolate covered peanuts you ever ate. Even on our budget that was tighter than a new pair of cheap shoes, we splurged and bought a half-pound or so. They were heavenly.

As I mentioned, the part of the store that had the candy counter also had things that break—things like table lamps—things like expensive table lamps. Now keep in mind we were not in that part of the store because we wanted a lamp rather we were there to eat our half-pound of the world’s best double-dipped chocolate covered peanuts.  Did I mention that already? Any way, we were munching away and we were so enraptured by the peanuts we sorta lost track of three year old Sarah. Well, Sarah was soon captivated by all those beautiful, big lamps and just could resist touching them. Oops.

As we munched, we suddenly heard a crash—a big crash. We took a couple of steps and there was Sarah and at her feet was one of the very expensive, big lamps. Just like Humpty Dumpty it had taken a big fall and also like Humpty Dumpty all the kings men was not going to put it together again. Thankfully Sarah was fine but I looked at Judy only to find her looking at me. We were in a financial crisis. We had no credit cards and no money in the bank—at least not the kind that it would take to buy an expensive broken lamp.

Just about then—grace showed up. A sales lady came over and saw the lamp. I explained how sorry we were and before I could explain we had no way to pay for it—she simply, gracefully said, “Don’t worry about the lamp. Accidents happen.” It might have been the desperation on our faces but more than likely it was Rebecca’s angelic smile. Regardless, grace saved the day. You know, Judy and I have never forgotten that day. The taste of the savory peanuts has long faded but not the grace that was extended to us that day.

The lady was right…accidents happen and by the way there weren’t any lectures about not being more mindful of the children.  There was just plain old grace. And that dear friends is just like our Dearest Daddy. When we find ourselves in the middle of our messes or when we step in something we should have avoided—there He is—ready and willing to extend His amazing grace to us. No matter what—He never stops loving us. No sin, no mess is bigger than His grace. So, yes, we should and need to be careful but we also should bask in His love. Go ahead and enjoy the world’s best double-dipped chocolate covered peanuts and rest knowing that—He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne