Posted in Family, fear, forgiveness, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, prayer, Scripture, Southern born, thankful, Trials

Confession

So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus.” Romans 8:1

It was the summer of my rebellion.  I know, some people are born compliant, and some are born a little on the rebellious side.  I was born compliant.  I have always been a rule keeper—well, at least most of the time.  I suppose that is why I took to religion so well.  You see religion is all about keeping the rules.  The idea is if you keep enough of the rules then people will like you and most importantly, God will like you.  And sure enough, it worked—well, at least part one worked.  In my younger years, most of the adults thought I was a good boy.  Church? Got it.  Drinking? Not a drop.  Drugs?  Nope. I can hear them saying it now, “That Dewayne is such a nice boy.”  And, I suppose outwardly I looked pretty good, but pretty good won’t get you to heaven.

You see the second part of the religion mantra is that you can make God happy by performing—by keeping the rules.  That one is 100% false.  There is no one, except Jesus, that was good enough to go to heaven.  Yet it seems so many church people say they believe that rules won’t get you to heaven but act as if they will. They carefully do this and that and boy, if you happened to be one of the ones who didn’t keep the rules, you were tried, convicted, and sentenced.  That’s why I had to keep my cussing summer quiet.

I think maybe all the rule keeping must have finally got to me.  The bottom line is during the summer between my junior and senior years of high school—I started cussing.  I had a job at an apartment complex down the road from our house and I worked with the son of the head maintenance man.  He was not a Jesus person, and he did like to cuss.  So, one day, I just started cussing too.  I had heard enough cuss words at school to know most of them, so I didn’t have to have any lessons…though I did have to work on my voice inflections.

It was a very tricky time in my life because I had to turn the cussing on at 8:00 am and I had to be sure and turn it off at 5:00pm.  That’s what you have to do when you are living a double life.  Under no circumstances did I want to spoil my good boy image at church or with my Momma and Daddy. I do remember one time I let a small one slip and Momma looked at me with eyes that said, “Where did that come from?” Of course, I didn’t, I couldn’t let her know that her baby son was a cusser.

And, as quickly as it came, it passed.  At the end of the summer, I had to go back to school and therefore had to quit my job.  All I know is that the cussing stopped and my rule keeping world got a little easier.  I managed to please a lot of people, but I knew I was far from pleasing God.  It would be several more years before I finally figured out that rule keeping didn’t work and religion didn’t either.  When I was 21, I finally found grace and boy was that a game changer.  Honestly, it is taking me a long time to shake the deep roots of rule keeping and religion.  I’m still working on it.

You might ask, “How do you know if you are under the influence of religion and rule keeping?”  Well, its two main indicators are self-condemnation and a tendency to judge others.  Rule keepers are acutely aware when they or others around them break a rule.  Rule keepers (and religious people) like to point out other people’s sins and faults because it makes them feel better about themselves.  If they can make you feel bad, then it makes them feel better.  It’s a twisted world.

God’s way is so much better than religion and rules.  Did you know His Book, the Bible, actually says that when someone believes in Jesus and becomes one of His followers that there is no condemnation—none—nada?  I mean when the prosecuting attorney and the judge both acquit you—the trial is over.  I’m slowly learning just how valuable that is.  There is an audience of One that Jesus followers must live for and that is God…their Heavenly Father…their Abba Father…their Dearest Daddy.  I love what Toby Mac (a contemporary Christian singer) said, “I gave God a million reasons not to love me.  Not one of them changed His mind.”  I like that!

Well, I’m glad my cussing summer is ancient history.  I still look back at those two or three months and wonder what in the world was I was thinking?  The truth is…I probably wasn’t.  But now, by grace, that, and all my other failures, warts and sins are forgiven…all because of Jesus.  I’m so grateful for that. If you have never discovered grace and forgiveness, especially God’s kind, I hope you will check it out.  Don’t get confused with religion and rule keeping like I did.  God’s got something far, far, better than that.  Think you’ve messed up too much to be forgiven?  Nope…don’t give it a second thought.  Trust me…He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, fear, food, forgiveness, friends, Grace, life, prayer, priorities, Scripture, thankful, Trials

Warning Signs

The prudent see danger and take refuge, but the simple keep going and suffer for it.” Proverbs 27:12

This is the kind of story I don’t like writing.  Since some of you know me and some of you don’t, I’ll start by saying that I have issues.  Yup…and more than one.  With that said, this story is about my health issues.  All my life I have had this battle with my weight.  Although people say I wear it well, I pack more baggage than I need to carry on this trip called life. Consequently, most of the time I am either on the way up…or on the way down.  That’s just the way it is.  And honestly, it is all about—sugar.

You see, I love snacks, and, I love sweet snacks.  Now I’m not talking about candy though I’m not saying I would turn down a Butterfinger.  No, I like the baked stuff and I am an equal opportunities eater.  Pies, cakes, donuts, cookies, brownies, cinnamon rolls—if it is baked and sweet—count me in.  To help counter the calories, I do try and exercise—at least some.  In fact, at the beginning of 2021 I managed to walk a couple of miles a day, five and six times a week for months.  Yay for me…but then something happened.  However, and whatever the cause, sometime in late fall I quit and when I quit—it happened.  The flat-out truth is I started gaining girth like a snowball going downhill.

Well, I did what any self-respecting foodaholic does—I just quit getting on the scale and, oh yes, I quit checking my blood sugar too.  Did I mention that I am a diabetic? Did you also know that donuts, cake, pie, cookies, and brownies don’t go with diabetes? But don’t worry, I’m not a severe diabetic. That’s another way you quit doing the right thing.  You simply justify your behavior. A guy said this week that justifying is “just a lying.” Ouch.

I was a recipe, no pun intended, for disaster.  I could tell I wasn’t doing well.  I could feel my body saying, “Excuse me.”  After binge eating on whatever was sweet one recent Sunday, I got on the scale on Monday.  Holy moly.  I also checked my blood sugar on Monday. Holy moly the second time.  Good grief.  I was so frustrated with myself.  I didn’t even have to ask; how did it happen?  I knew…all too well. In fact, a friend asked me what I did to end up there.  I told him the answer was, “What didn’t I do?”

Here’s the deal.  You know those red lights and crossing guards at railroad crossings?  Do you know the consequences when you ignore them?  Well, I ignored the lights and the crossing guard and the easiest way to do that was just quit—quit weighing and quit sticking your finger.  Anybody can tell you the truth of this. To start down the wrong path just STOP doing the things that help you be accountable.  Maybe, your AA meetings.  Maybe your exercise.  Maybe going to church.  Maybe reading your Bible.  Well, the list goes on and on.

I stumbled on a really, good verse in the book of Proverbs.  It says a wise person will see danger and take cover.  A foolish (or inexperienced) person will see the same danger and keep right on going.  That’s a good verse. No, that’s a great verse. What about you, what is it in your life right now that you can see the red lights flashing and the crossing guard down?  More importantly, what are going to do with it?  Trust me…it is really important.  You see that decision will determine your regrets and consequences.  Remember that “holy moly” moment I wrote about? Yup, that’s the deal.

The answer is simple.  Stop saying tomorrow and start today.  There’s a saying I just love—when you are tempted to stop, just remember why you started.  I know I’m only just started but already I can feel and see a difference. When I visit my doctor again in about three months, I hope we can have a different conversation than the one we had recently. I am grateful that my body still responds to doing the right things.  And for me it is relatively easy…at least with these two things.  But trust me there are other things that are a daily battle.

The good news is I have Someone who stays by my side…as the Bible says, a friend closer than a brother.  Who would that be?  My Dearest Daddy.  He is for me and never against me.  He has things planned for me that are too good to miss. I know this season of COVID has messed with our spiritual stuff badly.  But I hope you will make the decision, today, to “get back on the scale.”  Your Heavenly Father will be there to help.  He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, fear, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, loving others, Military memories, prayer, priorities, Scripture, Southern born, sovereignty of God, thankful, Trials

A Leap of Faith

Once I was young, and now I am old. Yet I have never seen the godly abandoned or their children begging for bread.” Psalm 37:25

It was a one and only, life changing, Valentine’s Day. It was 1982…forty years ago.  My wife Judy and I were enjoying life and enjoying our still “new to us” daughter who had just turned one.  And that isn’t all.  My wife Judy was expecting our second child due that August.  As Gomer Pyle used to say, “Surprise, surprise, surprise.”  But there was more…a lot more.  You see, about a month before that Valentine’s Day, the pastor where we attended church had asked me to speak on Men’s Day.  In case you’re wondering, Men’s Day in a Baptist Church is where the men step and do something.  It could be singing in the choir or like me, speaking.  Yup, the pastor had asked me to speak that day and I said yes.

That wasn’t a total surprise.  The previous year he had asked me to share my Jesus story…how I met and responded to faith in Jesus.  He later asked me a curious question.  “Dewayne,” he said, “have you ever thought about becoming a pastor?”  Well, the truth was I had but not seriously. After all, I had a great career going in the Air Force and with another baby on the way, well, it wasn’t on my radar. So, I sat down and wrote something that I thought would work and I guess it did. But from that moment on, something was restless in my soul.  I was afraid if I ever tried this speaking thing it might start something and it did.

For the next month or so, things kinda rolled around in my soul. Something was stirring but I think even I was surprised by what that thing was.  So, that Valentine’s Day, Judy and I did what we always did on Sunday…go to church. I’m sure there were cards exchanged and most likely a gift or two but it was a normal, “get up and go to church” Sunday.  We went to our Bible study class (which remains one of our favorite memories…great friends getting together).

After class we headed to worship.  We were sitting in our “normal” spot…center section, five or six rows back.  We sang, we prayed, we gave, and then we sat down to listen…and apparently, God was talking…to me.  At the end of the service, we always had a time for people to go forward and pray or perhaps make some sort of commitment. Well, without any warning (God does that sometimes), an unexpected passion or urgency came over me and I found myself leaving me my seat and heading toward my pastor.  I took him by the hand and told him God was calling me to be a vocational pastor.  I don’t believe he was shocked, but I can tell you I was.  I knew this meant a total life change and career change.  It still amazes me as I think about it.

Well, there’s a lot to the story but that decision led me to leave the Air Force after 12 years and jump headlong into the pool of faith and trusting God.  Today, February 14th, marks that day forty years ago.  You might be wondering, “So, Dewayne, how did that work for you?”  Well, there has been bumps, but I want to tell you that God has been so faithful to us. We have had the ride of our lives and it has been incredible. There’s a verse in the Bible where the author says that he had never seen someone who followed God forsaken or begging for bread.  Well, that’s a pretty broad statement and it is certainly needs to be taken as a principle and not a promise, but I can tell you God has watched over us these four decades.

Valentine’s Day is and should be a special day.  I know it was probably a ploy by Hallmark to make a ton of money.  I know it can be a blessing for those who remember and a bane for those who forget.  But for me, it is a time to remember the day I jumped…and God caught me. You might know that in the military if you serve 20 years you can retire handsomely. You may have done the math and concluded that if I had served eight more years, I would have been “fixed” for life.  You ask, “Do you every regret getting out and losing “all of that?”  My brother-in-law asked that one time and my answer was, “Absolutely, 100%, no.”  I wouldn’t have missed this story for the world. Oh, and the best part is…it’s still being written.  You might wonder why I can end each story with, “He’s got this.” Well, the truth is, He’s proved it over and over again.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, fear, forgiveness, Grace, gratitude, life, love, priorities, Scripture, sovereignty of God, Trials, wisdom

Preachers, Chicken, and Golf

Trust in the Lord and do good. Then you will live safely in the land and prosper. Take delight in the Lord, and He will give you your heart’s desires. Commit everything you do to the Lord. Trust Him, and He will help you.” Psalm 37:3-5

It never was my thing.  I have been a pastor now for four decades and I’ve learned that there are a couple things that just seem to go with being a preacher.  Number one is food…and fried chicken…in particular.  I know there are pastors who don’t like fried chicken, but I personally tend to look at them with a little suspicion.  I mean, you know, chicken—preachers: preachers-chicken.  I once heard a couple of chickens talking and one was bragging to the other about her children. The other chicken asked why, and she said, “They are all “in the ministry.” Hmmm. That is a bad joke.

Now the other thing that kinda goes with being a preacher is golf.  It goes like this, “So you are a preacher?” “Why yes.”  “Do you play golf?” “Of course.” Well, unlike chicken, that is one preacher thing I don’t do and there is a logical reason—I’m terrible at it.  I’ve hit the ball a few times but that’s about it.  My golfing career came to a sudden stop after one particularly frustrating attempt to play. On that day, I was on the course with a very good friend who had invited me to try and play. After several holes, in frustration, I finally blurted out, “Why am I doing this?  I can stay at home and be frustrated for free.”  And that was it. Game. Set. Match. Oh wait…that is tennis…another thing I can’t do well. In spite of the demise of my golfing career, I have grown in my appreciation for the game.  It obviously involves a whole lot of practice and skill.

One time we were staying at a home in Vero Beach, Florida.  The home backed up to a very nice golf course.  In fact, it was a world-class course. Even with my limited knowledge, I could tell the fairways on this course were better than the greens on most.  It was magnificent. It had strict rules and you had better observe those rules.  I had learned the hard way that you don’t drive a cart on one of the greens. If you do you might be shot or at least chased off the course.

Well, we were at this place for about a week and every morning I would have a cup of coffee on the patio and watch all these people play golf.  Then something happened that totally surprised me. One morning, a crew with some specialty tractors showed up and began to tear up the part of the course behind our house.  They methodically destroyed the thing that only days before they had carefully cultivated and protected. The very thing that would get you thrown out if you abused it was totally messed over.  What was going on?

The answer was simple. The caretakers of the course knew that periodically you must come in and rebuild the course.  This involves hurting the thing they love so it can be made stronger. It restores the soil which in turn helps the grass to grow stronger and greener.  It really confused me but then I realized that is exactly what must happen in our lives.  We have a heavenly Father who loves us so very much.  Yet, just as the caretaker knew what was good for the course, our Father knows what is good for us. And that means sometimes He allows difficulties and adversity to come into our lives to stretch our faith and to teach us to lean on Him.  His activity in our lives, even when it involves painful experiences, is strong proof of His love. Read that again.  It means He loves us and cares for us.

God is love, God is good.  You can take it to the bank.  If we listen to our circumstances and the culture around us, we will be discouraged and disillusioned.  There are two things we can do that will keep us on track.  First, look back and count our blessings and second, spend time reading and meditating in His book, the Bible.  What we put in our brain sure tends to affect how we live.  One of the guys who wrote the book of Psalms in the Old Testament part of the Bible said we should trust in the Lord, delight in the Lord, and commit everything to the Lord.  That is just good advice.

So here is the end of the golf course story. What had been so torn apart on Monday was already healing and growing by Thursday.  Though we had to leave, I’m sure just weeks later, the course was better and stronger than ever—and you can believe and trust our Dearest Daddy for the same. He knows you better than you know yourself and no matter how difficult the day, you can believe that “He’s got this.” Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, fear, forgiveness, gratitude, life, Scripture, Southern born, thankful, Trials

The Antlion

Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour.” 1 Peter 5:8

Where I lived growing up, I could go fishing and lion hunting every day. It was such an adventure living at 6008 Carlton Road.  All the people who lived in the new subdivision being built across the street had no idea.  Imagine…lion hunting and fishing every day, any day, and it wasn’t my imagination.  You see, our house, like many older houses in northeast Florida was placed on blocks leaving a couple of feet of space between the house and the ground.  And that space was where lions lived, and fishing happened.

No, I wasn’t hunting the king of the jungle and my fishing didn’t involve a pole or water…for that matter. Living under our house was the fierce larva of the predatory antlion…and they were just waiting for me to come along and challenge them.  You see the antlion lives in and loves soft sand…just like we had under our house at 6008. They had a tricky way to catch their food.  They would burrow in the sand and make a cone shaped pit and then hide in the bottom.  Ants or other insects would come along, fall into the pit, and the antlion would reach up from beneath the sand and grab them with their long pinchers and…well, it was game over.  Rarely did an insect survive the pit or antlion. And rarely did an antlion escape from Dewayne the lion hunter.

To catch an antlion, you simply found a spider web, and trust me there were plenty, and twist it into a sorta thread thingy.  You would then attach that to a small stick and then…just go fishing.  I would crawl under the porch (one of my favorite spots) and look for the cone shaped pits of the antlion. After finding a good one—the bigger the pit, the bigger the prey—I would take my stick and ever so gently, and slowly, drag the spider web around the bottom of the pit.  The old antlion would think it was a poor trapped insect and latch hold of the spider web and I would “reel” him in by raising the stick and out would come the antlion. Now what’s really cool is that they would put up a pretty good fight.  Some of these guys were a half-inch long so it was pretty exciting!

What was kind of funny was that even after I pulled the antlion from out of the sand, he just kept hanging on. I’m not sure if he was just really hungry or half blind but rare was the day that he just let go of the spider web.  Now, the story does have a happy ending.  This was strictly a “catch and release” thing. I would study him a while and let him dangle a while before putting him back in the sand. If you are a regular Grits reader you know not everyone got off so easy. Many a “love bug” and ant suffered very different fates.

I was always amazed how easily these fierce hunters became the hunted and fell for the same old trick but then I realized how often we do the same thing.  Every day, or at least it seems that way, we are tempted to do something that just isn’t good for us or wise and yet time and again we fall for it.  Whether it is a food choice, a decision to put something in our brain that doesn’t need to be there, or to say something that is covered with barbs, we simply seem to fall for it time and again. Like I was intentional in my fishing for antlions, the Bible tells us someone, something is intentionally tracking us…hunting for us.

It was Peter (not Pan but the guy in the Bible) who talked about the devil being like a “roaring lion” and his mission is simple…find lunch.  Peter says that he prowls around “seeking someone to devour.”  No, he doesn’t actually eat us, but he does devour our character, our integrity, our legacy, our marriages, our careers and that is just the short list.  The good news is that there is a lion hunter who wants to be on our side…and His name is Jesus.  Lions can be scary but the fear quickly flees with your Lion Hunter, never loses and never misses, walks by your side.

So, if you find yourself like the ant who wandered around under my house and slipped into the pit, just know help is nearby.  Whisper a prayer or shout one out and the great Lion Hunter will be there.  He is never far away and always one step ahead of the antlions in our life.  Yup, you can rest assured, “He’s got this.” Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, fear, gratitude, life, love, loving others, Scripture, sovereignty of God, thankful, Trials

God’s Keen on You

Yet You made them only a little lower than God and crowned them with glory and honor.” Psalm 8:5

I never was really good at it.  I’m not really sure where it all started.  My wife Judy will occasionally ask me, “So where did it come from?”  And, my answer, is always the same, “I just don’t know.”  That thing, that “it”, is the issue of low self-esteem.  Now, in a world where too many people think too much of themselves, you might think that is a virtue…but it’s not.  In a world that could use a healthy dose of humility, you might think that is something to be valued…but it’s not. In fact, someone once said whether you are thinking too much of yourself or too little…you are still thinking of yourself and that is called pride.

But the real problem with a low view of ourselves is that we find it is in direct conflict with God’s view.  Now don’t let this go to your head…but He is pretty keen on you.  He thought so much of you and so desired a relationship with you, that He sent His Son on a mission to die for the sins of the whole world—including you.  Now that is amazing.  So even though I often doubt myself—God never does.  Even though I often think I can’t, He believes I can. And even though I was always the last chosen for the team, He picks me every time…and not last.

A guy named Matt Tullos wrote a story about all the reasons that God could have used not to choose us…and there are a lot.  But it is comforting to know that most everyone He used in the Bible was broken, flawed, or scarred.  I mean, I know we all are, but some of these folks were real, excuse me, losers. Look at this list from Matt’s story.

“There are many reasons why God shouldn’t have called you to be His child.  But don’t worry.  You’re in good company.  Moses stuttered.  David was too small, and his armor didn’t fit.  John Mark was a quitter and was rejected by Paul.  Timothy had ulcers.  Hosea’s wife was a prostitute.  Amos’ only training was in the school of fig-tree pruning.  Jacob was a liar.  David had an affair.

Solomon was too rich. Abraham was too old.  David was too young.  Peter was afraid of death.  Lazarus was dead.  John was self-righteous.  Naomi was a widow.  Paul was a murderer.  So was Moses.  Jonah ran from God.  Miriam was a gossip.  Gideon and Thomas both doubted.  Jeremiah was depressed and suicidal.  Elijah was burned out.  John the Baptist was a loudmouth.  Martha was a worrywart.  Mary was lazy.  Samson had long hair.  Noah got drunk. Did I mention that Moses had a short fuse?  So did Peter, Paul–well, lots of folks did.

But God doesn’t require a job interview.  He doesn’t hire and fire like most bosses, because He’s more our Father than our Boss.  He doesn’t look at financial gain or loss.  He’s not prejudiced or partial, not judging, grudging, sassy, or brassy, not deaf to our cry, not blind to our need. As much as we try, God’s gifts are free.  We could do wonderful things for wonderful people and still not be….wonderful.  Satan says, “You’re not worthy.”  Jesus says, “So what?  I am.”  Satan looks back and sees our mistakes.  God looks back and sees the cross.  He doesn’t calculate what you did in ‘78.  It’s not even on the record.”

I like that a lot.  Matt’s got one more thing to say. He says, “Sure.  There are lots of reasons why God shouldn’t call us to be His child…. to serve.  But if we are magically in love with Him, if we hunger for Him more than our next breath, He’ll use us in spite of who we are, where we’ve been, or what we look like.  Whether we are pastors, missionaries, teachers, deacons, ushers, or nursery workers, we should step out of our limitations into the limitless nature of who God is.  Then our passion for God and our passion to communicate Him will make mincemeat of our limitations.”

How incredible is all of that.  Let me shock you with what God’s word says about you. It says of us, “Yet You [God] made them [that would be us] only a little lower than God and crowned them with glory and honor.” Wow! So today, let’s tackle the day like we believe what God believes about us. Let’s charge forward like the starting quarterback that God says we are.  No, we are not perfect, not even close, but we do have a King who is.  And if are Jesus followers, well, our Dearest Daddy longs to whisper in our ears, “I love you, I believe in you and no matter what, “I’ve got this.” Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, fear, friends, gratitude, life, love, loving others, priorities, Scripture, Southern born, thankful, Trials

Ride a Cock Horse

Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins.” 1 Peter 4:8

I was chosen to ride a horse.  When I was in the third grade, our school was going to put on a musical.  Back in those days, being a part of something like a school musical was cool.  Today, in most circumstances, mention a musical to most boys and all you can see is the dust from their feet as they run away.  But this was a different time and being chosen wasn’t only cool…it was an honor.

I think the show was a variety thing and two other boys and myself were going to sing a song about riding a “cock horse” to “Banbury Cross” to “see a fine lady” who rode a white horse. She wore rings on her fingers and bells on her toes and she had music wherever she went. Well, anyway it was something like that. Our costume consisted of the three of us wearing white shirts with white pants.  They made us a hat like the one’s the soldiers wore in “The Nutcracker” and a cardboard white horse that we slipped over our heads and around our waists, so it appeared we were riding it. 

An important part of the costume were the shoes.  According to the director, we were to wear white buckskin shoes…and that was the problem.  I had a white shirt, and a pair of white pants were easy enough to come by but buckskin white shoes?  No way.  It is safe to say that no one who lived at 6008 Carlton Road ever owned or wore white buckskin shoes.  I also think it is safe to say they were out of our price range.  The best Momma and Daddy could do was a pair of white canvas tennis shoes.  I was mortified.  I knew, and I was right, that the other two boys would have on white buckskin shoes, and I would be the only one who didn’t and I was embarrassed.

As always, I should have known that Momma and Daddy had done the best they could do and that should have been enough but from my small world perspective it wasn’t. I’m sure there was a fair amount of pouting and applying an unfair guilt trip on my parents.  I’m sure they felt bad, and I am sure it was my fault.  The truth is…I was being very selfish.  Something like selfishness is easy to see in the rearview mirror when enough time and distance has passed.  And I’m sure that was not the only instance.

Well, the show must go on…and it did and guess what?  Not one person said anything about my white canvas tennis shoes.  Nope…we sang and danced our little cock horses across the stage and everyone clapped.  Of course, looking back, I shouldn’t have worried about the shoes but rather about the whole idea of prancing around a stage with a cardboard horse around my waist. Perhaps part of the humor in all of this is I still remember a lot of the words and the tune to my “Cock Horse” song.

I’m not sure when but somewhere along the journey I realized that what I thought was a big deal was not.  And, trust me, that was not the only time.  I’ve learned that we humans tend to made mountains out of molehills. And I’ve also learned that too often it revolves around relationships.  Too often relationships with family and friends are scarred or shattered over the smallest of things.  And, sadly and ironically, sometimes people don’t even remember what the deal was.  Walls were built and no one knows why, and no one has the courage to tear them down.

Got any walls in your life?  Still mad about something as silly as buckskin shoes?  If so, why not let today be the day when the walls come down?  Why not let today be the day when that relationship is restored?  Why not be the one to take the first “whack at the wall?”  As a pastor, I do a lot of funerals and sadly, there are often walls in the families and just like that…it is too late to fix it.

Peter, one of the guys that followed Jesus, wrote in the Bible, “Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins.” He knew that love makes a great sledgehammer for tearing down walls.  God knew that too because He loved us even though we weren’t close to being worthy.  It takes courage to take the first whack.  God willingly took the first swing to bring us home and it involved a Roman cross and His Son.  Need a little help swinging that hammer?  Not a problem…just ask because, “He’s got this.”  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, fear, forgiveness, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, loving others, prayer, Scripture, thankful, Trials

Unwanted Legacy

Do not be deceived: “Bad company corrupts good morals.”

1 Corinthians 15:33

It was an unwanted legacy.  My wife Judy and I have three adult daughters. It is a standing joke in our house that anything that is bad or negative (weight, cholesterol, heart issues, blood pressure, etc) always come from me…the dad.  The good stuff invariably is attributed to the mom.  Now there can be no doubt that our daughters get their good looks from her, but I think there might be a little prejudice about this other stuff.  I am sure it all can’t possibly come from me.  Or can it?  You see, sometimes I think that I might, accidentally, unintentionally pass on an unwanted legacy.  Let me give you an example.

So back in August of last year I went dancing with my worse girlfriend, Corena.  In case you don’t know that was my nickname for the COVID virus.  Yes, I had been vaccinated but regardless she asked if I wanted to dance and apparently, I said yes.  It wasn’t fun.  As COVID cases go, might wasn’t too bad but it was enough to make me glad when the dance was over. Fortunately, as far as I know, no one, including my wife, came down with it.  After a week or so, it was all over and in the rearview mirror.  No harm, no foul just a bump in the road of life.

Well, late this past fall I started feeling crummy again.  I checked in with my doctor and friend and he quickly diagnosed me with the flu—let’s nickname that “Flo”.  Now this wasn’t the stomach flu…this was the real deal.  I’m not sure if it was Type A or Type B but I do know it was the kind that made you want to die. It, like Corena, lasted long enough for me not to want to have it again and I was glad when she waltzed out of the room.

Well, it all started on a Friday evening. I developed a cough and just started crashing.  Unfortunately, three of my grandsons were spending the night and not knowing what the deal was…they just cuddled up with “Papa.” As the night went on it was apparent that I had something, but we just didn’t know what.  The next day they all loaded up and went home and I went to bed. At the time I didn’t know what I had but I hated that I might have infected them. My diagnosis didn’t arrive until Sunday and the bad news came on Monday.

Yup…my daughter called and two of the three had an unexpected, unwanted legacy.  It wasn’t high blood pressure, or cholesterol, or hair loss…it was the flu.  Fortunately, there weren’t any complications, but they sure felt lousy for several days.  I can remember Judy talking on her phone to our daughter with the speaker on and I could hear one of coughing and it just broke my heart.  Unexpected, unintentional, or not…I had infected, impacted them.  It was an unexpected, unwanted legacy.

Well, all that thankfully is in the rearview mirror but the whole deal left me with an important lesson.  Whether it is a health deal or some other sort of deal, we need to understand and realize that we are all impacting those around us.  And, often, it is the ones closest to us…the ones we love the most.  Of course, there are plenty of good legacies and for those we can and should be grateful and proud.  But there are others…actions and words that scar or habits that hurt…that we need to arrest so we can avoid passing them down and around.  Perhaps it would be a good idea to take our “legacy temperature” frequently. Perhaps we should ask and honestly answer the question, “Is there something that might be a story, a memory, a habit that might be an unwanted legacy?” If there is, we should take action to stop it or change it.  The good news is- rarely is it too late to stop before there is an unwanted impact or infection.

It’s probably not the best verse for this story but it sure rings true.  Paul, the one who wrote a bunch of the New Testament Bible said, “Do not be deceived: “Bad company corrupts good morals.” Usually, bad company is intentional, and unexpected and unwanted legacies are not…but the outcome can be same.  So, starting today, ask the hard questions and make sure what you are leaving behind is not only worth sharing but a story that would make others smile.  Need a little help?  I know just the one…my Dearest Daddy. He is always there, always willing to help.  He’s got this too. Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, fear, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, loving others, prayer, Scripture, sovereignty of God, thankful, travel, Trials

Life From Ashes

The Lord Himself will fight for you. Just stay calm.” Exodus 14:14

It was a night that will not be forgotten.  For many years, my family has visited the Pigeon Forge, Tennessee area for vacation. It has not been every year – but occasionally.  We love the trails and the mountains and, of course, all the places to eat.  In some ways it is like a county fair because fair food and rides are everywhere.  Several years ago, we began joining my daughter and son-in-law with the grandkids in the fall…usually in November.  In a word, it is fun.

In 2016 something happened that changed that area forever.  A fire started by human hands near Chimney Tops on November 28th of that year and quickly spread through the dry, tinder forests.  The results were catastrophic and have been cited as the worst natural disaster in Tennessee history.  Before it was all said and done, 14 people lost their lives, 2,460 buildings were destroyed, and 17,900 acres were burned.  We watched on the news as it happened but also saw from a distance some of the devastation years later when we visited.  There was safety in that, on television and from a distance, but what happens when the tragedy gets more personal?

A couple of years later we once again returned to the Gatlinburg area.  Rebecca, my daughter, always makes the reservation, and she did again this time.  As we were driving to the cabin, we passed through an area that had obviously been damaged by the wildfire.  Judy made the comment that according to the GPS we were not too far from our cabin.  We could look up on the ridge and see many cabins far above the valley floor.  What we did not see was a lot of trees.  Apparently, the fire had destroyed them.

As we made our turn on the road that would lead to our cabin, it soon became apparent that we would see the power of the fire from that night up close.  The higher we climbed, the more we saw.  There were trees scarred by the flames and only the foundations remaining where cabins worth hundreds of thousands of dollars had once stood.  Some cabins had been rebuilt, some were being rebuilt, and some, well, stood as silent witnesses of destruction.  It was harsh, it was sad, it was awakening.  Suddenly the memories of what I saw on the news four years ago came to life like the dry bones Jeremiah saw in the Bible.

After an almost two-mile trip up the mountain, we came to our cabin.  There it stood, looking strangely new in one of Gatlinburg’s esteemed older rental areas.  It was indeed new because it, like almost every house in the area, had been destroyed by the fire that night.  In front of the house was a twenty-foot section of tree that, while not alive, still sends a message.  Carved into the massive trunk were the words “Smoky Strong.”  I’m sure the tree was alive and well the night the fire swept the mountain, but even today it sends a message…we are not done.

All around the area were signs of destruction…of what used to be.  But wait…don’t miss this.  Also, all around the area were signs of new life, of renewal, of rebirth.  New trees are replacing those lost, new homes are replacing the damaged, and many foundations will one day bear a new building.  The pain and suffering of that night is being replaced by the hope of the future.  I think we all can learn a lesson from Gatlinburg.  Over the last couple of years, a fire of sorts has swept thru our nation.  It bore several names, names like COVID, disunity, racism, and its flames were the flames of fear and hatred. The question is what will we do with this hot mess?  That is a question we have been asking now for too many months.

I’m sure many have concluded that life will never be the same, and that is probably true.  But why do we have to assume that this also means it won’t be better?  Why do we have to assume that our best days are behind us?  I know this.  God is still God, and the last time I checked, He has not given up control to His enemy the Devil, or fear, or COVID.  Moses, speaking for God, said, “The Lord Himself will fight for you. Just stay calm.” You see, He still reigns, and as long as that is true then the best is yet to come. The.Best.Is.Yet.To.Come.

I’m sure the house that once stood there was beautiful in its own rights.  I never saw it, but I sat in its successor, and it was beautiful.  I stood on the deck and had a clear view of the mountains and the valley below—a view that may have been obscured by the trees of the old normalcy.  Perhaps the ability to see clearer is a gift.  Perhaps the ability to trust God deeper is a gift from our Heavenly Father.  No, as I have said before, COVID and all its side effects are not good, but God can and will bring good from it.  For some of us, that means a deeper trust in Him. For some, it means a clearer view of what really matters in life.  For some, it will be the realization that it is good to have a Dearest Daddy we can rest in—knowing He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, fear, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, loving others, missions, prayer, priorities, Scripture, thankful, travel

Trust Your Purpose

For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things He planned for us long ago.” Ephesians 2:10

His name was Scott, and he was doing God stuff in Africa.  In my office there is a picture.  It shows a group of people under a tree, and it is very apparent that we are not in Kansas anymore.  There is a lady dressed in African attire with her hand on the head of an African man. There are four African folks sitting and watching.  Next to the man are two men…myself and a man much my junior, Scott.  And indeed, he was there doing God stuff.  In fact, that is why we were under the tree.

You see, under the tree was a man who said he was possessed by a demon and, needed, wanted, our help.  So, we laid hands upon the man asking Creator God, the One that is not bound by time, space or borders, to intervene in this man’s life.  Soon, our time was finished. The man was at peace, the other Africans probably mystified by it all and we, the three from another time and place, were grateful for the opportunity to represent God in this hard place called Mali.

So exactly how did two American men so different in starting points, backgrounds, and generations end up under a tree in Africa?  Well, it was a God thing.  My wife Judy and I have led teams to Africa for years and that’s why we were there.  Scott, the younger man, had decided to give up a chunk of his life and go live in Africa to share Jesus with the people there. For some reason, we just hit it off.  The common denominator was Jesus and that was enough.  Our time together was marked by wandering the various villages where we would visit and tell stories from the Bible to people who had never heard them before.  It was profitable…both for them and for us.

Soon, too soon, our time on African soil came to an end and it was time to leave.  We talked about another time…perhaps next year.  Time came and went and before we knew it…it was next year.  That year we were going to do several things, but one thing was new…we were going to do an eye clinic.  We would have an eye doctor with us and with a few incredible tools we could test eyes and give away glasses.  I took the training to use one of the devices and agreed to work in the eye clinic.  And off we went to Africa.

When we arrived, there was my friend Scott.  He was excited to see me and was looking forward to wandering the villages and telling Jesus stories with me.  I told him that I would be working in the clinic and watched as disappointment filled his eyes. Over the next few days we did clinics and once or twice Scott stopped in to see if I could get away to wander. I told him I couldn’t since I was one of just a few that knew how use the machine.  Finally, on our last day of the trip I did manage to sneak away, and we wandered for a few hours, telling stories.  And that is when I got it.  I had missed an opportunity to use my calling, my purpose, my giftedness.  I wasn’t called to check eyes…I was called to wander…and tell stories…of Him. It was a powerful lesson for me.

I still wonder how I missed it that year in Africa and the picture in my office reminds me to be careful not to miss it again. Oh, and that is not only true in Africa…it is true here in my hometown.  God made each of us and in His wisdom, He gifts us to make a difference.  That is true for people who believe…and people who don’t.  All of us are created to make a difference and that is what we need to do.  I have found and know that becomes much more powerful when we ask God to come into our lives in a personal and real way…through His Son Jesus.

Someone gave me a small, white plaque that now sits on my desk.  It has three words on it, “Trust your purpose.”  That too is a reminder for me to be sure and seek and do what God has created for me.  Sometimes that looks like wandering and telling stories, but sometimes it is something as simple as being kind or giving someone a break in traffic.  We need to find our purpose and then trust that purpose…do what God on purpose created us to do.  It says in His Book that we are a masterpiece created by Him and for Him to do the things He planned for us. Trust me, that will make you get out of bed in the morning!

So today, this day, trust your purpose.  If God is your Father, trust Him to lead you as you wander today.  Not your Father?  Well, He would love to fix that.  Just ask.  And then you can have the confident assurance that He will lead you into some adventures that are bigger and better than you can imagine.  Trust me…He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne