Posted in Family, forgiveness, friends, gratitude, life, marriage, priorities, school days

Happily Ever After

 “You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in Your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.” Psalm139:16

Cinderella and happily ever after.  Most of us grew up knowing at least something of fairy tales. Mr. Disney was just getting started and there were few animated films but slowly things changed.  Over the years, what was once only printed on the pages of a book became alive on the screen before our eyes…and it was amazing.  For years there were the classics, Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Pinocchio, and Peter Pan to name just a few.  And the list has grown and grown.  When we watch them, we often want to be them. As the story plays out and ends with the dramatic “happily ever after” we sigh and long…if only.

Each fairy tale, every animated story begins with a “once upon a time…” It sets the stage for the story and then slowly, and almost invariably, the plot develops and oh so often there are plenty of bumps and bruises along the way.  There is usually a bad guy or guyette and they slosh their mess all over the screen, hurting and wounding.  And then, right when it seems that they are going to win…things turn around.  Good overcomes evil, the weak become strong and the impossible becomes…possible. Just about then the “happily ever after” music begins and we smile at the end, we savor the redemption, and we leave feeling good but knowing that story could never be our story.  Or can it?

You see, all our lives begin with a “once upon time…” All of us have a beginning—even me.  On that day a grand story began to be written.  A little boy with dreams about a big future. A teenager trying to figure out what life was all about.  A husband and later a father trying to figure that out—still trying to figure that out.  Twelve years in the service of his country and forty-two years in the service of his King. Mountains and valleys, wins and losses, victories, and defeats—fighting monsters and dragons and loving his fair maiden and their princesses. Whew…what a journey.

And honestly, there were times when I would ponder how all this would play out.  Having watched a whole lot of “redemption” movies where the end is always exactly how we would want it, I wondered, “What about this story?”  Perhaps you have done the same.  Perhaps you have wondered how your story will end.  Perhaps you have longed for a different story…a different prince or princess, a different role, something, anything different.  Well, I have some good news for you.  The Playwright for your story never makes a mistake and never gets it wrong.  He has been writing stories since before the beginning of time.  In fact, the Bible says that He wrote every scene of your life before there was a “once upon a time.”  In Psalm 139:16 it says, “You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in Your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.” Wow…how about that?

But wait…it might just get better.  So, every story, including yours, can be like every fairy tale.  A beginning, a story filled with up and downs, bumps and bruises, toads, and princes.  But here’s the best part—every story can have a “happily ever after.”  No, really.  You see the same book and the same God who promises that every day, every scene in your story has been written and planned promises a “happily ever after.”  Oh, it is not always here, though sometimes it is.  It is in eternity.  When we are willing to put our faith and trust in the Prince of Peace and the King of Kings we have the promise of an eternity that is beyond our wildest dreams.  Believe what He did and choose to follow Him and heaven is the end of the story.

It is nice when the story, our story, plays out like we want and wish. It would be nice if every detail was just as we would have written it. Perhaps, but maybe not, because the One who writes the story, our story, is far wiser than us.  We probably won’t be able to understand or see that entirely till the end but, well, that is what faith is all about.  So, trust Him for the grand finale. It is going to be a wiz-bang finish.  And until then…enjoy the show…savoring the good scenes and trusting in the hard ones.  He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in forgiveness, Grace, gratitude, life, Scripture, thankful, Trials

Messes to Masterpieces

 “For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things He planned for us long ago.” Ephesians 2:10 

Messes. Yup…been there and done that. All of us have made a mess at one time or another. Sometimes it is a spilt drink at the dinner table. Sometimes something slips from our hand and onto the floor. Sometimes we get way too much paint on the brush or roller and we go from masterpiece maker to mess maker. The old saying says, “We shouldn’t cry over spilt milk” and I get it but sometimes it is just so frustrating. But wait! A spilt glass of milk or a splattering paint roller is one thing but what if the mess is a broken marriage?  A broken heart? What if the mess costs you thousands or a couple of years of your life? You see messes can have huge consequences.

I’m glad to let you know that when there is a mess on aisle three there is someone who can clean it up.  I’m glad to let you know that there is someone who can take the mess on the wall and turn it into a masterpiece. The other day I was reading a story that is pretty amazing and the best part is that it is true.  It all happened over a hundred years ago when a group of fishermen were relaxing in the dining room of a Scottish seaside inn, trading fish stories. Well, one of the men gestured widely, depicting the size of a fish that got away. Accidentally, his arm struck the server’s tea tray, sending the teapot flying into and on the whitewashed wall, where its contents left an irregular and very large brown splotch.

The innkeeper heard the commotion and came out of the kitchen and into the dining room. With a groan of dismay, he surveyed the damage and sighed, “The whole wall will have to be repainted.” “Perhaps not,” offered a stranger. “Let me work with it.” Having nothing to lose, the owner agreed. The man pulled pencils, brushes, some jars of linseed oil, and pigment out of an art box. He sketched lines around the stains and dabbed shades and colors throughout the splashes of tea. What happened next was almost too hard to believe.

After an hour or so, an image began to emerge: a stag with a great rack of antlers. It was nothing short of amazing. Then, the man who had turned the mess into a beautiful picture, signed his name at the bottom, paid for his meal, and left. His name: Sir Edwin Landseer, famous painter of wildlife. And what was not obvious soon became so.  In his hands, a mess became a masterpiece. Wait…think about it. A.Mess.Became.Masterpiece. Amazing.

But here is something more amazing.  You see, in God’s hands this happens time after time after time.  As He works in the messes of our lives He can take the biggest mess and turn it into the most magnificent masterpiece rendering them as beautiful expressions of His great love. The result is our lives become a gallery of pictures—examples of the incredible wealth of His favor and kindness towards us.

So let’s be honest. Messes are going to happen and no that isn’t an excuse for sloppy living but neither does it mean we are worthless and hopeless. No, we are His masterpieces—trophies of His amazing grace. Each day we see examples of His creative grace that are always signed—I’ve got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in forgiveness, Grace, love, loving others, priorities, Scripture

Dare to Believe…to Love

 “Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are My disciples.” John 13:35

Do you ever wonder why? You know, one of the most important, and dare I say essentials, in my life is my belief in God. I have written many times how I am a pretty simplistic guy and I guess that is one thing that makes it easy for me to believe in God. It seems that no matter where I look I see evidence for God. On the other side of the coin as hard as I look I just can’t find a good reason not to believe in Him. Which leads to my thought for today. Why is it so hard for so many to believe and trust in God?

Well, get ready for an ouch. I think it might be us. I am fearful that too often we are too inconsistent with the God stuff in our lives. Too often it seems were are saying one thing and living another. A saying from decades ago says, “We have met the enemy and he is us.” The saying comes from Walt Kelly, a cartoonist who worked as a Disney animator before launching “Pogo” in 1948. 

True historians may recognize it as a play on a famous quote by U.S. Navy Master Commandant Oliver Perry during the War of 1812, written in a letter to Major General William Henry Harrison: “We have met the enemy and they are ours.”

Both quotes hold powerful truths that we can and should have the courage to face. Yes, in many ways, we can be our own worst enemies—and that true in many ways and areas of lives.  It is definitely true in the church world. Jesus said that the world would know we were Jesus people by our love.  Ask yourself, “How evident is Jesus’ love in your life and in your church?” Jesus didn’t say loving was easy but as Bob Goff said in a devotion, He did say it would work. Nice.

So what do you do with the “not easy” part? Well, the quote from 1812 helps us here.  It says, “We have met the enemy and they are ours.” What does that mean. Commandant Perry was saying that the battle had been fought and won. And when we put this battle, the battle to love like Jesus, in the hands of Jesus—we will win.

If you are one of those who are still struggling to buy into the God thing, if you are one of the ones who has simply seen to many inconsistencies to believe, here’s a thought.  Blaise Pascal, the famous French philosopher, physicist, and mathematician, said, “Belief is a wise wager. Granted that faith cannot be proved, what harm will come to you if you gamble on its truth and it proves false? If you gain, you gain all; if you lose, you lose nothing. Wager, then, without hesitation, that He exists.”

Wow—I like that a lot. Believe—if it all proves false, you lose nothing. Choose not to believe and if it is true (and I totally believe it is) you will lose everything. Please don’t let the inconsistencies of Jesus followers keep you from believing. After all, none of us are perfect.

So whether you are on the verge of believing or whether you are a Jesus follower—remember this. The faith to believe and the strength to love like Jesus loved doesn’t come from us—it comes from Him.  He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in forgiveness, Grace, Scripture

The Scars Remain

 “Fear not; you will no longer live in shame. Don’t be afraid; there is no more disgrace for you. You will no longer remember the shame of your youth and the sorrows of widowhood.” Isaiah 54:4

Gnarled trees stood twisted and broken along the road.  Several years ago, Judy and I had to make a trip to Florida to participate in my aunt’s funeral.  She was my Daddy’s baby sister and the last of that generation.  It was a long trip but worth the journey.  I saw it as a way to honor my father while also honoring my aunt.  Like every person her life had its ups and downs and bumps and bruises.  And like every person there were a few scars left along the road.

It was while traveling West in Florida that I began seeing the gnarled trees.  Mile after mile of trees that were either broken in two, forever bent over or simply lifeless, like dead men standing. I knew the area had been brushed by a recent storm or two, but this damage was caused by something far worse—and not so recently.  Suddenly it occurred to me.  I had seen this before about two years ago.  It was the result of a storm, a terrible storm called Michael.

If you remember in 2018 a compact yet incredibly powerful storm came ashore at Mexico Beach, a small town on the Florida panhandle.  It was so devastating that it literally destroyed that small town and the path of the storm with its destruction moved well inland.  That is where we saw the scars.  When we were here a couple of months after the storm for miles and miles inland there was debris piled everywhere along the highway.  What wasn’t broken off or blown over, looked like it had been given a perm—twisted and turned.  That was years ago.  

The scars of that harsh and horrible day remain today and will remain for many years to come.  Only time is going to slowly erase the damage as trees regrow and underbrush hides what has fallen.  It looked devastating two years ago when I saw it and remains so today.  Sometimes the scars are almost as bad as the wounds.  Sometimes the memories are worse than what caused the pain.

Many of us have caused scars and most of us bear them.  Some are still healing while others, like the gnarled trees, will remain.  We are left to wonder what to do…how to heal.  The answer I believe lies with Creator God.  It is He who can give us the strength to forgive, and it is He who can lead us down the path to healing.  Like a good recipe, it will include a measure of grace, a measure of mercy, and a measure of choice.  Forgiveness is never about the one who caused the scar rather it is about the one who was hurt. When we forgive, we truly begin to heal.

Forgiveness also involves forgetting…but not the kind you are thinking.  This forgetting simply means that we choose to not allow the past to control our present.  We choose to let go, so we can be set free.  When we determine that the past won’t reach into our present…we find a freedom.  While the scar will remain, slowly but surely the pain eases and we are eventually left whole.

This, of course, is a faith path.  We must believe that God can and will heal us.  We must believe that God can forgive us if we were the one who caused the scar.  We have to believe either way that His grace is sufficient, and do you know what?  It is.  The scars I saw that day along the highway spoke of a devastating storm, but it also spoke of hope.  You see, at the base of the gnarled trees stood dozens and dozens of new growth trees.  One day, someday in the future, they will rise to overcome the past with its scars.  That is our hope.

As I stood before those gathered at my aunt’s funeral there was a mention of mistakes and regrets. I also spoke of forgiveness and grace which was and is a game changer.  No matter how difficult your past and no matter how uncertain your future, His grace will see you through.  I hope you will keep trusting Him day by day.  I hope you will look up for hope, look around to see that you aren’t by yourself and look down, yes down, but only to see the new life surrounding you.  Hey, you can trust Him, you can rest in Him because no matter how hard the wind blows or how long it howls…He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Christmas, communication, Family, forgiveness, loving others, school days, Scripture

Gifts and Lizards

“Love keeps no record of wrongs.” 1 Corinthians 13:5b

 It was a lizard but when you’re eight—it’s a dinosaur.  Growing up in North Florida, which is a somewhat, semi-tropical area, there were always all kinds of insects and reptiles to watch or capture.  One of these was a small lizard…a sort of dinosaur in miniature.  It seemed they were everywhere.  Sometimes they were brown and sometimes they were green but always they stirred my imagination and when that happened, they were always bigger and more vicious than they were in reality. But it is amazing what an eight-year-old mind can come up with when he has too much time on his hands. I know I captured more than a few…usually by grabbing them by their tail.  I was always amazed when their tail broke off and while he managed to scurry away, his tail remained…still wiggling.  I later learned that their tail would slowly grow back and I guess I’m glad they did.

As I grew older, it seems the lizards got smaller and soon became a sense of novelty and nothing more. Gone was the fear of what they could do to me as I realized what I could do to them.  I’ve found out that not only applies to lizards but memories from days gone by. About the time I was a chasing lizards and yet being a little fearful…something happened.  It was Christmas time and as the day approached, I knew I didn’t have anything to give to my Momma. Poking around the house, I discovered a plastic flower arrangement sitting in the corner of the breezeway that connected our house and a garage turned into a bedroom.  Partly out of desperation and party through the eyes of an eight-year-old, I decided I would wrap the well-worn and faded flowers and give them to my Momma for Christmas.  So, I put them in a box, wrapped it all up and put it under the tree.

Christmas morning came and as was tradition, we all gathered in the living room as the presents were handed out and I watched as Momma was handed the box and unwrapped it.  Probably speaking to no one in particular, I heard her say, “Well, these are those flowers from the porch.” I was devastated. I knew it wasn’t much but I was hoping that something ordinary would be magically transformed by Christmas.  Now, let’s be clear.  Momma wasn’t being mean or hurtful.  Her words that day were just a statement of fact, and she might probably was not aware I had heard them…but I had…and a scar was born.

For years and years, I carried those words in my heart…and with them came the rejection that only an insecure eight-year-old can feel.  A few words casually spoken left a wound that for years refused to heal.  Listen, I know my Momma and I know she loved me but sometimes the best of us can utter words that get stuck in our memories and like those lizards…seem to grow into monsters.  Probably all of us have them…probably all of us have said them…probably all of us regret saying them.

I can’t remember if I ever told Momma about that Christmas and those words, but I can tell you it is no longer a deal.  Yes, there is a small scar on my heart, but that scar reminds me of something important.  Scars are wounds that have healed.  As I grew older, I was able to let go of the hurt because I grew to understand that no matter what words she spoke that day, her actions over the years more than proved her love.  If nothing else, those words remind me that she wasn’t perfect…just like me, just like you and just like the last person who wounded us.

Remember this.   Christmas is about love and love is about forgiveness.  My favorite verse in 1 Corinthians 13 reminds me that “love keeps no record of wrongs.”  It turns out that love makes choices possible.  We get to choose what to do with the things that are tossed into our laps.  We get to choose what we do when someone else’s mess gets sloshed on us.  I’ve learned I can’t control others; I can’t always control the circumstances around me; but I can always control my response…and that is important.

So about sixty Christmas’s have come and gone.  Momma is long in heaven, and I am grateful that I can sit and click keys on my keyboard and smile at all the precious memories I treasure in my heart.  And some of those memories that used to be dragons are now simply little lizards.  In case you are wondering how that works…well once you’ve experienced God’s grace and His forgiveness…it is a no brainer.  After all, He’s got this. Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, forgiveness, Grace, gratitude, life, Scripture, thankful

Peanuts and Grace

 “Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” Hebrews 4:16

I think you really don’t appreciate grace until you really need it. It was probably around 1984. I was a young pastor squeaking by on a salary of $12,000 a year and trust me that was lean times. There was no health insurance or any other benefits. With that said, my wife Judy and I decided to load our two kids up in our car and drive to Kansas City to the mall there. It was only about 45 minutes and would be a cheap outing—almost.

Well, we soon found ourselves in the Sears and Roebuck store at Independence Mall. We also found ourselves in the part of the store where they sell things that taste good and things that break. The taste good part was the candy department. For those of you who missed this great part of life, Sears actually had a place where you could buy candy by the pound.  They also happened to sale the best double-dipped chocolate covered peanuts you ever ate. Even on our budget that was tighter than a new pair of cheap shoes, we splurged and bought a half-pound or so. They were heavenly.

As I mentioned, the part of the store that had the candy counter also had things that break—things like table lamps—things like expensive table lamps. Now keep in mind we were not in that part of the store because we wanted a lamp rather we were there to eat our half-pound of the world’s best double-dipped chocolate covered peanuts.  Did I mention that already? Any way, we were munching away and we were so enraptured by the peanuts we sorta lost track of three year old Sarah. Well, Sarah was soon captivated by all those beautiful, big lamps and just could resist touching them. Oops.

As we munched, we suddenly heard a crash—a big crash. We took a couple of steps and there was Sarah and at her feet was one of the very expensive, big lamps. Just like Humpty Dumpty it had taken a big fall and also like Humpty Dumpty all the kings men was not going to put it together again. Thankfully Sarah was fine but I looked at Judy only to find her looking at me. We were in a financial crisis. We had no credit cards and no money in the bank—at least not the kind that it would take to buy an expensive broken lamp.

Just about then—grace showed up. A sales lady came over and saw the lamp. I explained how sorry we were and before I could explain we had no way to pay for it—she simply, gracefully said, “Don’t worry about the lamp. Accidents happen.” It might have been the desperation on our faces but more than likely it was Rebecca’s angelic smile. Regardless, grace saved the day. You know, Judy and I have never forgotten that day. The taste of the savory peanuts has long faded but not the grace that was extended to us that day.

The lady was right…accidents happen and by the way there weren’t any lectures about not being more mindful of the children.  There was just plain old grace. And that dear friends is just like our Dearest Daddy. When we find ourselves in the middle of our messes or when we step in something we should have avoided—there He is—ready and willing to extend His amazing grace to us. No matter what—He never stops loving us. No sin, no mess is bigger than His grace. So, yes, we should and need to be careful but we also should bask in His love. Go ahead and enjoy the world’s best double-dipped chocolate covered peanuts and rest knowing that—He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Christmas, Easter, forgiveness, Grace, gratitude, life, Scripture, spiritual battles, spring, thankful, Trials

Paradise Lost and Found

For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through Him.” John 3:17

It was paradise lost. I’m not sure why it happened.  I’m not even sure how it happened…but it did.  Several years ago, we had accumulated a great collection of large tropical plants to accent our patio during the summer.  Our guests love our garden, and I suppose they love our plants too.  But then something happened.  You see; to keep them alive through the winter, we had to move them into our garage and nurse them during the cold weather.  We would install special lights, water them, and learn to squeeze our car in between them.  It was a hassle, but we did it…until we didn’t

One year, well, we didn’t. It all started when we had a light frost early in the season and since Judy was gone…I didn’t mess with it.  That’s the bad news.  The good news is that somehow, they survived. Since it happened on my watch, I breathed a sigh of relief.  That opened a pandora’s box because when the next frost came, and I believe it was on my watch again, I found a reason to throw caution to the wind.  Once again, they survived and so did I.

Then, fast forward a little while later, we were deeper into fall and nudging winter.  With Judy back, the plants were in safer hands.  When the temperatures threatened to move from frost to freeze, we braved the cold wind and moved them inside displacing the car to the fate of the cold.  Sure enough, it warmed up again, and out they came.  Well, that year we decided to go on a cruise.  We knew the forecast called for a couple of cold mornings, but we were pressed for time and couldn’t think of anyone to gather the plants for us…so we left them to their fate.

Sure enough, it froze and so did they…all of them.  At first, it wasn’t too bad but then it was.  Some quickly, some slowly began to show the damage of a freeze on something that was never meant to see or feel the extreme cold.  Some leaves wilted and some turned dark brown.  The result was a paradise lost.  What was once beautiful looked like a tropical war zone.  It also meant a lot of whacking and cleaning up to do.  It was sad in one way but wait there is a silver lining.

You see, first, there was more room in my garage this winter.  Yay.  It also meant that there was a fresh start…a new beginning when spring came.  Yes, there was a cost involved…there usually is for a new beginning…when something is reborn. But it was worth it. Several plants showed their age, and the new ones will be stronger than the old ones. It.Was.Worth.It.

You know God said the same thing about us, don’t you?  You know that God knew we needed a lot more than a time in the “garage,” we needed a fresh start, a new birth and yes, it came at a great price.  It meant there had to be a Christmas and there had to be an Easter.  It meant His Son leaving heaven for a stable and a feeding trough and it meant a rugged Roman cross, a horrible death but gratefully…also a resurrection.  It meant we could go from eternal death to eternal life—that we could go from war to peace—that we could call Him…wait for it…Father. But all that was possible only after the price was paid. Like the song says, “Jesus paid it all, all to Him I owe.  Sin had left a crimson stain, but He made it white as snow.”

White as snow. From death to life. How amazing is that?  Each fall, I scour the yard and remove the death…preparing for spring and new life.  I chose to look past the present and forward to the new…to spring.  And, if your world looks a little like my backyard with more dead than alive, remember that God waits to bring new life into your life.  He said in John 3:17 that His Father didn’t send Him to condemn the world but rather through Him we, you, could be saved…rescued…redeemed.”  That is good…that is really good.  So, no matter the mess, write it down…He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in communication, Family, fear, forgiveness, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, loving others, prayer, priorities, thankful, Trials, wisdom

Don’t Be a Worrywart

Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank Him for all He has done.” Philippians 4:6

She comes by it naturally. My wife Judy and I have three daughters. One of my great pleasures in life was to watch them grow into beautiful young women—both inside and out. I told them the other day that they should be very grateful to us—and especially their mother Judy—because they are each so attractive. In each one of them, you can see things that they have picked up from either me or Judy.  I have one daughter who is a natural born worrywart. She manages to worry about just about everything.  I wonder who she got that from? Well, let me just say it was not her mother. While I am not a worry wart, I could probably qualify as a worry something.

In a culture that is obsessed with appearance, guess what? I’m certain that a lot of those lines that people get Botox treatments for come from worrying. Wait…that isn’t all. Surely a lot of those gray hairs the ladies (and some men) try to hide also come from worrying. Now that I think about it, that might be why so many pastors have gray or white hair. It isn’t about worrying as much as it is trying to care for all the members that do.

It has been reported that 90% of the things that we worry about never even happen. Think about that. I was reading a devotion the other day and it included this very insightful quote by some unknown author.  It said, “Worry is a conversation you have with yourself about things you cannot change. Prayer is a conversation you have with God about things He can change.” Isn’t that awesome. We worry about things that are usually totally out of our control.  Jesus said in His Sermon on the Mount, “Can any of you add one moment to his life span by worrying?” Now how is that for irony.  Obviously, Jesus knew that the opposite was true.  Worrying never adds—it always subtracts.

 For years I have had plenty of long conversations with myself and they were often about things that I couldn’t change. Let’s read the first part of that quote again—“worry is a conversation you have with yourself about things you cannot change.”  Check—been there—done that. Now let’s focus on part two. It says, “Prayer is a conservation you have with God about things He can change.” Wow—how powerful. It looks like it boils down to four simple words—worry less, pray more.

Paul gave us something better than anxiety pills and Botox.  Here is what he said in Philippians 4:6, “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need and thank Him for all He has done.” So, we need to discipline ourselves to worrying less and also pray more. Simple and powerful. There is one more element.  Did you see it? Paul also said for us to adapt an attitude of gratitude—let Him know what is messing with us and then be sure and thank Him for all that He has done. Now there is one more thing we should do.  We need to be sure and believe that our God is a “I’ve got this” kind of God. Do you know why?  Because He is.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in communication, Family, forgiveness, friends, Grace, gratitude, love, loving others, school days, Scripture, spiritual battles, thankful, Trials

My Amazing God

As the Father has loved Me, I have also loved you. Remain in My love.” John 15:9

If He can’t, why am I surprised that I can’t? Do you know what still amazes me?  Creation…and not just part of it…all of it.  I’m amazed when I stop and look at the colors of the leaves in fall.  I’m amazed that the sun rises and sets day after day.  I’m amazed that my heart beats about 70 times a minute.  That is, wait for it, 100,800 times a day.  In case you are interested that is 36,792,000 times a year.  And, so far, it’s done well for 70 years.  Oh, and I’m amazed that out of all the galaxies, solar systems, and planets—zillions of them—only one can support life as we know it.  Earth.  And it is no accident.  It is an intentional act of creation.

God is really good at creating things.  He made us.  The Bible says that we are “fearfully and wonderfully made.” In another place in the Bible He says we are His masterpieces.  Now granted some are Rembrandt’s and some are Picasso’s, but we are all masterpieces.  Handcrafted by the Creator of the universe—a “one of a kind” miracle. I know He made me with a few quirks and several warts and that is the point of this story…one of my quirky warts.

You see, from the time I was a little kid I have wanted people to like me.  I have craved approval from the time I can remember.  Whether it was from my Momma and Daddy, my brothers or sisters or the guy who picked up our garbage…I wanted approval.  Let me tell you if you are going to have a quirk…there are a lot better ones than this one.  The problem with “approval-itis,”the need for people’s approval is that it leads to a far worse disease—the passion, the drive to please people.  Now if I lived out in Montana where my nearest neighbor was 20 miles away, this wouldn’t be such a big problem.  But my life revolves around people—I was a pastor for goodness’ sake.  And to be honest, I wanted everyone to be happy and I wanted every one of them to like me. Sigh.

To be clear…the deal isn’t their deal…oh, no it lands right in my lap. The wart with all its bumps is right here.  For years I have been learning, or trying to learn, that I will not ever, never, please everyone.  But like an alcoholic craves the bottle—so we people pleasers crave approval.  And, by the way, I’ve gotten a little better.  Now, if I’m driving down the street and I wave at someone and they don’t wave back, I don’t write down their license plates and put a contract out on them. Smile.

If you can identify in any small way with “approval-itis” I have some good news that is sure to help you.  No, it is not seeking counseling and paying someone $200 dollars an hour to tell you that you can’t please everyone.  No, it is not moving to Montana…that wouldn’t work anyway because you would think the horse didn’t like you!  No, it is something that I read in one of my devotions one morning. It is a simple truth.  Are you ready?  Here it is, “You can’t please everybody.  Even God couldn’t please everybody.”  Now isn’t that just profound…and true.  I mean God is like all powerful, all wise, all knowing and can be everywhere at the same time and a majority of the world is always mad at him.  How about that?

Think about it.  If God couldn’t pull it off, then who am I to think that I can? I guess God could snap His celestial fingers and make everyone like Him, but He has this thing about free will.  He doesn’t want to make people love Him—He wants them to love Him because they want too.  Because.They.Want.To. He loved us so much that He gave His only Son to die on a Roman cross and He did it knowing that many…maybe most…would never even respond.  Amazing.

So, here’s the deal.  I understand that I will never please everyone…probably not even a fraction of the people I bump into.  I can’t do that, but I can do this.  I can love like Jesus loved. He said, “As the Father has loved me, I have also loved you. Remain in my love.” He was saying, “Hey, when it comes to loving people…I’m all in. Sit back and enjoy it.”  I can give my best not because a person will respond like I want, but rather because that is what my Dearest Daddy wants me to do.  And guess what?  His approval is the only approval that matters.  We should live, love and long for the audience of One—Jesus.

Well, truth be told, I won’t get this one right in this lifetime because I probably won’t live that long—like a million years.  But with His help I can be more like Him, every day.  Love God, love people.  It’s that simple.  If you are “plum wore out” from “approval-itis,” well, why don’t you just take a rest.  You can, you know—because “He’s got this.”  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in fear, forgiveness, Grace, gratitude, life, loving others, prayer, priorities, Scripture, spiritual battles, travel, Trials

Light at the End of the Tunnel

I have come as a light to shine in this dark world, so that all who put their trust in Me will no longer remain in the dark.” John 12:46

There’s light at the end of the tunnel.  I have heard that saying all my life (well, at least a chunk of it).  But the truth is the light at the end of the tunnel just might not be enough.  You see, about 20 miles from where we live, there is a bike trail with a tunnel that is 543 feet long.  It’s located in beautiful Southern Illinois.  Oh, I know, I say beautiful and Illinois in the same sentence and all people can think of is flat corn fields and Chicago.  But tucked away in what we call the “real” Southern Illinois are many trails with beautiful hills and rock bluffs in the Shawnee National Forest.

Tunnel Hill Trail is a gem in our area and perhaps the highpoint of the trail is its tunnel. For several years, our church had an annual bike ride that began at the tunnel.  At its peak we would have over a hundred riders—big and little, young, and old. What makes it even better, the small town of Vienna (where we had our picnic) was only ten miles or so from the tunnel and that part of the trail is either flat or slightly downhill.  I told the church riders that, but I’m sure after riding it they thought I might have stretched the truth.  Well, maybe a little.  But the truth is—ten miles on a bike seat is still ten miles on a bike seat.

I have learned over the years to respect every foot of the tunnel there.   As you enter the tunnel, two things are apparent.  One, there is plenty of light so it is easy to assume that there will be plenty of light all the way through.  That would be a mistake.  Second, you might assume that since you can see the “light at the end of tunnel” that would be enough to get you through.  Uh, that would be a mistake too.  Let me describe it…though words really can’t do the job.  You must experience it.

Whether you are riding your bike or walking, as you enter the tunnel you really do think, “Oh, this isn’t too bad.”  There is plenty of light and of course, you can clearly see the light at the end of the tunnel.  Slowly, very slowly, almost without noticing, the light fades away and suddenly, just shy of halfway, you find yourself in a total, eerie, darkness.  What seemed so easy now seems increasingly difficult.  Even with the light at the end of the tunnel, you can’t tell where you are going.  You think you are in the middle of the trail when in fact you can easily be heading straight for the walls.  Over the years, everyone who has ridden with our group has made it through the tunnel.  It’s just that some of them came out with a few bruises and scrapes…courtesy of “the walls.”

Well, after about a hundred feet, light slowly starts appearing around you and before long the light pouring in from the end of the tunnel envelopes you…and you are glad. I’ve even ridden in the tunnel with a flashlight, and it still seems difficult.  You see, light at the end of the tunnel or not, darkness is difficult.  You simply lose all sense of where you are.  That is true in tunnels…and it is true in life.  Too often we are faced with choices and decide that we can handle what our common sense tells us is a bad idea.  We enter the tunnel with plenty of light and assume we have escaped the blight of our choice.  Only later do we see what we couldn’t see—the consequences of our decision.  Only when we “hit the wall” do we understand the pain of our decision.  It is only after we emerge back into the light that we can see the wounds from the walls and realize the scars that we will bear.

Life will have its valleys and not all tunnels in life are caused by our misguided choices, but the good news is regardless—we can find help.  Imagine what it would be like to take sunlight with us into the valleys—into the tunnels of life. What if the deepest valley and the darkest tunnel could be lit as noon is on a sunny day?  Well, it can.  You see, there is a light that defies darkness and is brighter than the sun—in fact, it is the Son.  Two thousand years ago a Man was born that claimed…and proved…that He was the Son of God and His name is Jesus.  Have you ever wondered why this simple carpenter from an obscure village in the Middle East commands center stage on the stage of history?  The reason why?  He is the real deal. The Bible describes Him as the Light of the world…and He is.  And when a person follows Him, he walks in His light.

Jesus said, “I have come as a light to shine in this dark world, so that all who put their trust in Me will no longer remain in the dark.” That is a claim, a promise, worth checking out.  When we were kids a lot of us were afraid of the dark. As adults most of us have outgrown that fear, but we still have reason to fear the phantoms of the dark…things that are bigger than us.  Jesus drives the darkness and phantoms away when we chose to follow Him.  He’s waiting right now to bring light into your life…your tunnels.  When we find ourselves in our darkest moment, you will hear the Whisperer whisper, “Fear not…I’ve got this.  And He does.  Bro. Dewayne