Posted in birthday, Family, forgiveness, friends, Grace, gratitude, Holidays, July 4, life, love, loving others, prayer, priorities, Scripture, sovereignty of God, thankful, Trials, USA

Happy Birthday, America!

If my people who are called by My name humble themselves, and pray and seek My face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land.” 2 Chronicles 7:14

Happy birthday, America! Today, we celebrate the 248th anniversary of the signing of the Declaration of Independence.  It was the time when brave patriots, and not just the ones who signed the document itself, said, “enough is enough.” It was the time when they dared to dream of something bigger and better than the life they had. It was the time when they wished something more not only for themselves but also for the generations to come.  They wished for something more for us.

Yesterday a friend invited me out to breakfast at Cracker Barrel. Since it was the day before the big day, I went to my closet and pulled out my second favorite patriotic shirt—I was saving number one for the birthday party—July 4th. The shirt is a full-blown declaration of love for this great country.  It is colored with the colors of our country…red for the blood that has been shed that we could be free…white for the purity of the motive of those who have served…and died for this great country…and blue for their loyalty to the American ideals—such as we are all created equal. I know we are still working on that one but regardless it is a standard worth working for.

The shirt also has stars and stripes and an imprint of part of the Statue of Liberty and across the chest it boldly has three letters—U.S.A. It is a statement of patriotism—of love and commitment to America.  Before I walked out the door, I grabbed my favorite veterans cap.  It is old and a bit floppy, but I love it too.  It carries the emblem of the Air Force on the front and the letters U.S.A.F on the bill and the back.  Finally, also across the back, it says above all. To me that is a testament of this veteran and every Air Force veteran that our service and willingness to sacrifice could and should be second only to our sacrifice and service to God.

I love America. I am proud that, by God’s grace, I was born an American. I am grateful that I was given the opportunity to serve America in her Armed Forces. The tragedy today is that too many have come to the conclusion that because she is not perfect, that she hasn’t lived up to all her ideals, that somehow that makes her less than.  Well, the truth is America is like us because America is us. And like us she never will be perfect but that doesn’t mean we should walk away from her. If America is her people, then perhaps we should complain less and step up to make her more.

My prayer would be that God would continue to bless this great land…not because we deserve it, because we don’t, but rather as an act of His amazing grace. The song says it best, “O beautiful for spacious skies, For amber waves of grain, For purple mountain majesties, Above the fruited plain! America! America! God shed His grace on thee, And crown thy good with brotherhood From sea to shining sea!” The second verse continues, “O beautiful for pilgrim feet Whose stern impassioned stress, A thoroughfare for freedom beat Across the wilderness! America! America! God mend thine every flaw, Confirm thy soul in self-control, Thy liberty in law!”

Let me suggest that we make a prayer for our country a daily matter of prayer.  After all, the One who made us is the One who can fix us.  Don’t forget, even in and especially in matters of our country, He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, forgiveness, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, loving others, prayer, Scripture, sovereignty of God, thankful, Trials

Thermostats

Adopt the same attitude as that of Christ Jesus.” Philippians 2:5

It just looked hot.  The other day I was lying on the couch in my living room. It is one of those nice long couches with plenty of room.  Even though I am not extremely tall, or as you might say, “height challenged,” it’s nice to know there is room to spare.  Our couch sits in front of a bay window, so I had a nice view of the trees outside and the clear blue summer sky.  It was good. I knew from a thermometer that registers the outside temperature that it was hot outside…really hot.  And, as I was lying there, I was just thinking how grateful I was for the guy who invented air conditioners.  Air conditioning is one of those things we take for granted and having been raised down south with only a window fan…well, let’s just say I’m grateful.

We are blessed at our house to have central air conditioning.  I have this thingy on the wall called a thermostat and it talks to my air conditioning…they are good friends and speak their own special language.  So, I tell the thermostat what temperature I like, and it tells the air conditioning. When it is needed, the thermostat prods the air conditioning and says, “Hey, we need some cool air” and just like that he fires up (no pun intended) and cools the room down.  It is a great relationship. Both are needed and I am grateful for both.

Now the thermometer and the thermostat are not the same thing.  You see the thermometer simply tells me the temperature, but it can’t do anything about it.  I could tell the thermometer, “Hey, I’m hot,” but all it can do is confirm the truth.  The thermostat on the other hand, can do something about it…and it does.  One instrument tells the condition of the room but the other can control the condition of the room.  How about that?

So, have you ever wondered if you are a thermometer or a thermostat?  Well, probably not, but the truth is all of us at one time or another are one or the other.  We find ourselves in a room of people and soon there is a discussion that goes south, and the temperature starts to rise.  If we are thermometers all we do is reflect the temperature and watch it rise. But if we are thermostats, we can help control the temperature with wise words and kind actions and maybe just maybe keep friends, friends.

Jesus was a great thermostat.  The four Books that talk about Him (Matthew, Mark, Luke and John) are filled with great examples. One time some rock chucking religious people wanted to stone a woman because she had sinned.  They asked Jesus what He thought, and He told them OK but the person without sin had to cast the first rock.  Boy, that cooled things off.  One by one the rock chucker’s stepped away till it was only He and the woman left. He told her he wasn’t going to condemn her and invited her to go and sin no more.  Amazing.

Today, especially these days, we need to be thermostats.  Every day there are situations that need a good thermostat and we Jesus’ people need to rise to the occasion.  Always be ready to set your thermostat to grace and then spread it around. Anybody can start a fire, or a fight or raise the temperature in a situation.  Anyone can reflect the temperature, but we are called to do more.  We are called to be like Jesus.

Paul, one of the guys who wrote the New Testament, said, “Adopt the same attitude as that of Christ Jesus.”  And what would that be?  It was His willingness to always go last instead of first. It was His willingness to forgive and not condemn.  It was His willingness to love the loveless, touch the untouchable, and care for the most unlikely.  It was being a thermostat.  I know that’s not always easy. It’s easier to tell a thermostat what to do than be one!  But don’t worry, God is ready and willing to help.  He loves it when His kids act like His Son.  No doubt…He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, forgiveness, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, loving others, thankful, wisdom

Living Loud – Living Love

“I give you a new command: Love one another. Just as I have loved you, you are also to love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” John 13:34-35

Have you ever wondered what people think…of you…of Christ because of you.  I recently attended the Southern Baptist Convention in Indianapolis, Indiana. Contrary to what you may have heard on the news, overall, the tenor of the convention was almost Christ like. It would have been nice if a stranger could have walked into the meeting and figured out quickly that these people were different…different in the way we talked, walked and spoke. I love what Jesus said in John 13:35. There He said, “I give you a new command: Love one another. Just as I have loved you, you are also to love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”

It’s ironic that He tells us it is a new command but in reality, it has been the message all along. What is different is the measurement of that love—love as Jesus loves—unconditionally and without limit. And, of course, it is the same love for all the people…All.The.People. And here comes the best part.  He tells us it is this love that will show, and people will know, that we are Jesus’ people.  Not where our car is parked on Sunday morning at 10:15, not our dress, not our bumper stickers or our tee-shirts—nope, it is His love lived out in us.  When we finally figure that out and do it—well, we had better keep the baptismal tank filled.

Something that will help us to remember to live this love out is something that Watchman Nee said.  Here it is, “Outside of Christ, I am only a sinner, but in Christ, I am saved. Outside of Christ, I am empty; in Christ, I am full. Outside of Christ, I am weak; in Christ, I am strong. Outside of Christ, I cannot; in Christ, I am more than able. Outside of Christ, I have been defeated; in Christ, I am already victorious. How meaningful are the words, “in Christ.” What is unusual is that he doesn’t mention love, but he does describe a life filled with Christ’s love. And when we get that, we will start loving like we should.

Someone said, “Live in such a way (filled with love) that those who know you but don’t know God will come to know God because they know you.” How true…how powerful. I hope today we will ask God, through the Holy Spirit, Jesus in us, to help us love like Him. No, we can’t, but with Him by Him and through Him…we can because, “He’s got this.” Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, forgiveness, friends, Grace, gratitude, Integrity, life, loving others, prayer, pride, Scripture

Soccer and Judging Others

Do not judge others, and you will not be judged.” Matthew 7:1

It happens far too often…but the latest occurrence happened in my living room and sparked this story. My wife Judy is the Missions Director for our Baptist Association and that makes her in-charge of this summer’s soccer camp. The camp is staffed by four young adults from an organization called Sports Crusaders.  They come in and teach soccer and talk about Jesus.  The goal is to give the kids something far more than new soccer skills.

The four staffers were due around four in the afternoon. The first young man who came in was just about what I was expecting—polite and willing to share. The other group of three arrived a little later. They consisted of a young lady, the team leader, and two rather tall and lanky guys. From my perspective they definitely looked like soccer players to me.  Judy had told me that one of the team was from Arkansas. We thought (wrongly) that it was the first guy to arrive, so I told him a corny joke that goes like this. “Which state is mentioned in the Bible?” The answer is Arkansas which is always followed by a quizzical look.  I then say, “You know, Noah looked out of the ark and saw.” Now isn’t that great. I thought so, guy number one thought so and when the rest of the team arrived, I tried it again.

Well, I should have quit while I was ahead. The lady team leader thought it was great but the other two guys with her looked at me like a “calf at a new gate.” My prize joke had not even garnered a smile. Hmmm. So, while Judy explained the week the two guys, seemed to hardly pay attention. It kinda rubbed me the wrong way. He kinda struck me as detached—disinterested. Well, right there and then, I judged them as unworthy ambassadors. Why, I bet they couldn’t even play soccer.

Well, hang on.  After explaining the week, Judy asked the guy in the middle his name and his story about Sports Crusaders. As soon as he spoke it was apparent that his heart language was not English. He spoke with a thick accent and since his name was French, I assume that was his accent. The story repeated itself with the other guy, but his name was not French, but his accent was just as thick.  And that is when this judge got fired. I realized that they weren’t rude, they weren’t detached, and they weren’t disinterested.  The fact is I think they were struggling to even understand the conversation.  I had wrongly judged these two young men and yes…I bet they could even play soccer.

My big truth, which I keep repeating in the classroom of life, is that it is so easy to misjudge both people and sometimes a situation.  I hope one day I will finally learn to leaving the judging to the Judge—the Lord Jesus.  I have learned that most of the time when I set myself on the judge’s bench, I miss the call.  Do you find that true too?  So, let me suggest that we learn to hang tight and get the whole picture before we act.  And even then…leave the judging to the Judge.  He always gets it right…right after all, “He’s got this.”  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, food, forgiveness, friends, life, love, loving others, Scripture, thankful, travel, Trials

Traveling Heavy

Let us lay aside every hindrance and the sin that so easily ensnares us.”  Hebrews 12:1b

I thought it felt heavy. You might remember I told you a story about a group of friends from our church in Cobden, Illinois who took a trip up to hike Mount Leconte in North Carolina.  In that story I slipped on a slippery rock and earned the name, “Chief Wounded Cheek.”  Well, that wasn’t the only story from that trip.  There was at least one more.  You see, even though we were only staying one night, most of us still had a backpack full of stuff to tote up the mountain.

What do you carry up a mountain?  Well, I guess it all depends on the person.  I know one lady in our group had her husband carry just about everything but the kitchen sink.  I remember we laughed when we found out she was taking her curling iron.  It wasn’t that it was inappropriate, it’s just that the top of the mountain didn’t have any electricity! In my case, I decided to leave the curling iron at home (smile) but did have a good selection of food.  I mean can you ever have too much food? I didn’t think so.

So finally, with our packs on our backs, we headed up the mountain.  The climb took us most of the day.  It was about five and a half miles and a lot of it was…up.  We went up and up and up and finally we made it.  The lodge was rustic, but the feeling of accomplishment made it all more than worthwhile.  Bob, our leader, said when we got there, they would give us some of the best hot chocolate in the world.  Well, they did but honestly, I think it was some of the best only because we were tired, chilled, and pretty desperate. 

For supper he told us we would be having canned horse meat.  Remember there was no electricity and that meant no refrigeration.  As it turned out, it really wasn’t horse meat, but I do believe it was canned and for the record…it was pretty stinking good.  Pretty soon it was time for lights out…well, there really weren’t any lights because…well, you know why.  We slept well, got up and had breakfast and soon started our journey back down the mountain.

I threw my backpack on my back and started the journey down.  I remember being surprised how heavy my backpack felt.  Again, a lot of what I carried up was food and it was no longer there…well, at least not in my backpack.  Anyway, we continued walking and after about an hour or so, it was time for a break.  I found a place to sit down, being careful of my “wounded cheek,” and opened by backpack for a quick snack.  And I found a surprise.

Yup, my backpack was heavy all right.  It turned out that some of the guys in the group had put several grapefruit size rocks inside.  They were just waiting for me to make the discovery and when I did, they laughed—we laughed until we couldn’t laugh anymore.  I love practical jokes regardless of what end of the stick I am on—giving or receiving. Well, needless to say, the rocks came out and the pack was considerably lighter, and we had a new story to tell along with my new “wounded cheek” name.

I learned a great lesson that day.  First and foremost—check your backpack—especially when you are traveling with a group of guys who love practical jokes.  I also learned that you should never carry extra weight up or down the mountain. Period. And in hindsight, that is true with hiking and that is true in life.  All of us have the tendency to carry extra weight around…and I’m not talking about around our waist.  I am talking about things that tend to weigh us down.  It might be a bad habit, or it could be the consequence of not starting a habit we should have, like exercise.  It might be misplaced priorities that steal time away from family.  Whatever it is, the truth is we need to chuck the unneeded and unnecessary.

Paul, one of the big writers of the Christian New Testament, said that we should lay aside every weight and the sin that slows us down.  Now that is good advice.  As we travel through this life, let’s get ready to go but let’s also be sure and check our backpacks.  We never know what might be in there and weighing us down.  If you need help figuring it all out, just ask the One who made it all.  You know, “He’s got this.” Bro. Dewayne

Posted in forgiveness, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, Military memories, prayer, priorities, Scripture, sovereignty of God, thankful, Trials, wisdom

Teach Me to Abide

I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing.” John 15:5

It is a beautiful song. Music has long played a major part in my life. Oh, it’s not that I am way talented and can play multiple instruments it more that I just love music. There are only a few types of music that cause me to push away…most seem to draw me in…move my soul. And trust me…I count it as a gift. I can stomp my foot with the best at a good country song and marvel at the harmony of a gifted bluegrass group. I love the blending of voices of southern gospel and barbershop. Music can cause my memories to soar as John Denver belts out Rocky Mountain High and another pair sings about laughter in the rain.

Even as I write this I’m smiling. During my one winter in Minot, North Dakota (courtesy of the United States Air Force) only one guy had a car, and we would stuff it full every two weeks on payday and would drive the twenty miles into town for two cheeseburgers, a fry, and a coke at McDonald’s. Two things were gimmes on the trip.  We would play “freeze out—rolling down all the windows with the thermometer hovering at ten degrees as long as we could stand it. The other was all of us singing at the top of our voices the hits of the day—especially John Denver singing about country roads that one day would take us home.

Take.Us.Home. Nothing stirs my soul more than songs about a God who loves me more than any words can express and one day will take me home. I’ve come to realize that music is the best language to encourage a broken heart and a longing soul. I was at a conference a couple of months ago and bumped into one of those game changing songs.  The worship team sang a song called, “Abide.” It is a mellow but hopeful song about God and how He watches over us in our day by day walk about life. One of the many key thoughts is based on what Jesus said in John 15:5. The songwriter put it this way, “You’re the Way the Truth and the Life, You’re the well that never runs dry, I’m the branch and You are the Vine, draw me close and teach me to abide.” How lovely…how thoughtful…how moving.

I love to go to YouTube and watch and listen as Arron Williams passionately sings these words. In the room with him is a guy playing keyboards. I watch as his fingers dance over the keys. Also in the room is a woman playing the cello. Oh my, at her command the rich tones fill the room and cause me to worship. Finally, there is the lead vocalist playing the guitar and artfully singing the beautiful lyrics.  All of this comes together and soothes my heart. This is a song I shared with my sister who was battling cancer and a dear friend who is also doing the same. She loved it, he loves it, and I love it too.

One of my favorite lines in the song says, “When I pass through death, as I enter rest, I depend on You, I depend on You. For eternal life to be raised with Christ…I depend on You, I depend on You. What wonderful words of promise. We will all face death one day but each one of us who knows Jesus will not stay there…we will pass through…depending on Him. So, I hope you too will discover or rediscover the world of music…especially the wonder of worship.  Allow it to teach you, fresh and renew the truth that, “He’s got this.” Bro. Dewayne

Abide (with lyrics)  https://youtu.be/BLDEt9KP2O0

Abide (live video) https://youtu.be/BA-Wi4fdcVE

Posted in Family, forgiveness, friends, gratitude, life, love, loving others, Scripture, sovereignty of God, thankful, travel, Trials, wisdom

Mountains or Monuments

Where there is no vision, the people perish.” Proverbs 29:18

It was on my bucket list. I confess…I am a pretty big fan of America. I mean, even with all of its warts, and there are plenty, with all its flaws, surely a bucket full, it is the best place to call home. Over the years I have visited over twenty-five countries—some in Europe, some in Asia and some in Africa. Some were affluent, some were poor, and some were somewhere in between. All had something to offer but none
could match this land I call home. While some of my visits were brief, my wife Judy and I lived three years in Germany and the final word was…wait for it…home is better… there is and was no place like home.
I think the secret to learning to appreciate where you live is to learn to look for the good and not bad, the whole and not the broken. The way we look at things can vastly change how we experience things. A few days ago, I mentioned a quote from a movie that I had watched which, by the way, was based on a true story. The guy said, “There are two ways to live—either nothing is a miracle, or everything is a miracle.” He opted for the latter and I think I will too.


Last year, we were out west on a trip with part of our tribe. The main, but not only, destination was to see Mount Rushmore. I’ve seen a chunk of America, but I hadn’t seen that…and yes, it was on my bucket list. So, the day came. As we drove toward the monument, suddenly, around a curve we were face to face, if you will, with Washington, Roosevelt, Jefferson and Lincoln and it was amazing. We parked the car and frankly, the closer we got, the more amazing it became.
This great tribute to America (no, it wasn’t just a tribute to four men) took over fourteen years to build. As you keep in mind it was about ninety years ago, you begin to appreciate the vision, work, and skill that it took to turn a mountain into a monument. I was amazed to learn that many of the workers, who often had 12 hours days, were paid about $14 dollars…a week. Those were hard times, and they were grateful to have a job. But for many…the job became a passion…a mission…a cause to believe in.


Somewhere along the journey, they stopped seeing a mountain and began to see presidents. Somewhere along the journey they began to see what Gutzon Borglum saw. While the project wasn’t his idea (that belongs to a guy named Doane Robinson) he was the one that chose that mountain. The quality of the stone led him there and, honestly, where others saw just a mountain, he saw presidents. He.Saw.Presidents.

So, perhaps, just perhaps, it does matter what we see around us. Perhaps if we choose to see miracles…or like Borglum to see monuments where others see just a block of stone, perhaps we can help make this world a better place. Perhaps our lives, regardless of our messy circumstances, will take on a deeper meaning and a deeper purpose. Perhaps if we learn that it is not about us but about others…things will change…for the better.


One of the writers in the Old Testament part of the Bible said that when people don’t have a vision, when they choose to see desolation rather than miracles, well, they perish. It is true individually and it is true corporately. If we are going to see a better world, two things need to happen. First, we need to learn not to just see a mountain but what that mountain can become. Secondly, and this one is for God followers, we need to believe again that with God nothing is impossible. As we stand on the edge of the new normalcy, with that stinking COVID in the rearview mirror, let’s choose to believe again. And why stop there? Why don’t we determine to see presidents where others see mountains and believe that “He’s got this.” Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, forgiveness, friends, gratitude, Integrity, life, loving others, prayer, Scripture, sovereignty of God, Trials

Hard Prayers…Harder Prayers

My heart is filled with bitter sorrow and unending grief for my people, my Jewish brothers and sisters. I would be willing to be forever cursed—cut off from Christ!—if that would save them.” Romans 9:2-3

There are prayers and then there are hard prayers. I sometimes think that prayer is one of the most misunderstood things in the Bible.  A casual glance at prayer can give a person the wrong impression of prayer…and I get it. Several times in the gospels and in Paul’s writings we get the idea that all we need to do is ask and God will grant our every wish. While I am certain I don’t fully understand all the ins and outs of prayer, I’m pretty sure that isn’t the way it works.

The other morning, I was having some Jesus time, and I was giving prayer my best shot. A friend of mine who is struggling with life crossed my mind. He is a great guy but if life was a baseball game, the score would be dramatically in the other team’s favor. So, I decided to pray and pray a little more boldly than normal. Because I care for him and his family, I prayed a big but hard prayer.  It went something like this, “Lord, I thank you for Steve, but he is so struggling with life.” That was the easy part—then it got harder.  I said, “Lord, I am asking you to do whatever is necessary to bring him home to you and not only him but his wife and children.” Wow…that was a pretty strong prayer.

I knew I was releasing God (not that He needs releasing) and in fact was asking God to work in a way that could be good…but might well be difficult.  That is the kind of prayer that just might not be appreciated…especially by the person you are praying for.  But here’s what I knew—the most important thing in life, and in his life, and in their life, is God’s redemptive work.  Even with all those good intentions…it was a hard prayer. But then…it got harder.

Part two of this prayer time was even harder and it was unplanned and for the most part unexpected. I began to pray this, “Lord, I want you to do whatever is necessary in my life” and it was just about then I paused.  Dare I continue, dare I pray this prayer.  Well, I did continue, “Lord, I want you to do whatever is necessary in my life to bring my friend Steve home to you, and his wife, and his kids.” Whoa.  Did I really pray for that? Well, I did and I’m not too sure it didn’t frighten me. But I just knew that love demands those kinds of prayers.

Well, that is where I left it with God. When I get brave enough, I will probably pray the same again..and again. I’m reminded of something that Paul, the guy in the Bible, said about the Jewish people. He said, “My heart is filled with bitter sorrow and unending grief for my people, my Jewish brothers and sisters. I would be willing to be forever cursed—cut off from Christ!—if that would save them.” Wow…I can’t imagine saying that, much less praying that.  That is a bold, love filled prayer.

So, if you have a prayer life and list, why not check, and see how your list looks.  Is it a wish list or bold list—prayers for you or prayers for others? We probably won’t totally figure this prayer thing out this side of heaven but until then, we can trust the One to whom we pray.  After all, He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, forgiveness, friends, Grace, life, loving others, prayer, Scripture, Trials

Not a Good Night

Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.” Proverbs 12:18

There is pain and then there is pain. We know that some people can be a pain in the neck…or worse. We also know about different levels of pain. There is the pain a woman must bear to bring a new life into the world.  There is the pain that a person endures when they have a kidney stone.  There is the pain of being hit by a semi-truck going sixty-five miles an hour.  And then there is the pain I experienced one night.

My wife Judy and I go to bed at different times, but we are usually within a few minutes of each other.  So, it is not uncommon for one or the other to walk into a dark room.  It’s not a big deal, really, because we have a light in the hallway that casts a little light into the dark room.  And perhaps that is the reason we do it.  “It” is we put a small pillow or some other something in the doorway to keep the door from closing all the way.  It is more a habit than anything though in the summer it ensures good air circulation. And that night, it was a setup for a painful good night.

Judy was in bed and the room was dark.  Uncharacteristically, the door was closed all the way so when I entered the room I couldn’t see very well. I knew she was still awake, so I asked her, “Where’s the pillow?” It was understood I wasn’t talking about the one for our heads but the one for the door.  I believe she responded, “I don’t know.”  Well, I looked in the dimly lit one side of the room and could see it wasn’t there.  So, I began to walk over to the dark side of the room and that, dear friends, is when it happened.

As I walked over, in the dark, to look for the pillow that should have been in the doorway, I hit…no, I sledgehammered, my shin and foot into the end of the bed frame. Let me explain.  Our bed frame is designed so you can attach a footboard if you want to.  Well, a long time ago we wanted to and then one day we removed it because we didn’t want to.  That left the bracket just sitting there waiting to cause pain. Part of the bracket got my foot and part of it got my shin. And when flesh collided with iron…it hurt, and it hurt bad.

I’ve never had a baby, but I have had several kidney stones.  I’ve never been slammed by a semi-truck going sixty-five, but I am almost certain that none of that hurt as badly as my shin and foot did.  I hollered…maybe even screamed! I hollered, well, I’ve already said that, and then I blamed…not me, not the iron frame but poor Judy.  My pain filled logic was it had to be her fault because she didn’t put the pillow in the door. Well, I did find the stinking pillow and I did put it in the stinking door. And I did one more thing.

As my shin and foot throbbed, as Judy apologized for what clearly wasn’t her fault and as she prayed for God to take the pain away…I realized I needed to apologize…and I did.  It was all fine in a few minutes as we drifted off to sleep…gratefully not mad.  Well, the next morning I looked at the wounds again and there were two gashes and one bruise. Ouch.  Did I mention a semi-truck doing sixty-five miles an hour or having a baby?  Judy stuck her head in my home office a little later and I showed her the bruise and apologized one more time for good measure…and I meant it.

This unfortunate encounter caused me to realize that we must be careful about pain. You see, whether it is emotional or physical, when we are filled with pain we can say or do things we later regret.  Someone said that hurt people hurt people. I know that is mostly speaking of emotional pain and scars, but it is also true when our foot and shin are sledgehammered into the bed frame. In addition to fixing or removing the problem, we need to plan, to practice how we are going to respond when pain walks into the room—or when we walk into pain. We need to plan, or practice hitting the pause button or yanking on the emergency brake of our words. If we do maybe we will stop before we let our hurt—hurt others.

Solomon, one of the wisest men to ever live, wrote in Proverbs, “Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.” Those are certainly wise words from a very wise man, but it is encouraging to know that even he didn’t always get it right. And guess what? Despite our best efforts, we won’t either.  But the good news is that when we don’t there is a graceful God who’s just waiting to forgive us and help us.  So, the next time you run into pain, hang on–He’s got this. Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, fear, forgiveness, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, loving others, prayer, priorities, Scripture, thankful, Trials

Unkept-the Look

Guard your heart above all else, for it is the source of life.” Proverbs 4:23

It was unkept…but it was cool. Ok, let’s just lay it out there.  I am just a tad on the old school side.  I was a teenager in the late sixties and early seventies with a daddy who wasn’t fond of anything countercultural—and that included longer hair.  That was phase one.  Phase two was twelve years in the United States Air Force.  They and my Daddy would have gotten along well since they weren’t fond of anything countercultural either.  Phase three was being a Baptist pastor.  Back in the days, Baptists were pretty much not fond of anything countercultural either.  Suits and ties were the norm and facial hair was basically a no-no.  So, you can probably understand that I wrestle with some of the new fashion norms. It’s not that I don’t like them—it’s just that I don’t understand some of them.

As an example, part of my morning routine is having a time with God.  Part of that is watching a short video of someone speaking.  This morning it was a pretty successful young pastor from somewhere.  As the video began, I noticed a couple of things.  First, his hair had the now fashionable “unkept” look.  It was like he got out of bed, ran his fingers through his hair and went to work.  Again, that’s cool.  Hang with me.  Second, he sported the wildly popular beard stubble look.  I mean if you don’t have a stubble… you’re not ready to rumble.  He had a good stubble.  Hey, that’s cool.  I wish the Air Force had discovered that when I was in. Again, the cool “unkept” look.

Another fashion statement with the “unkept” look are jeans with holes in them.  They are crazy poplar.  When I was growing up jeans with holes were tossed out and people who wore them were poor.  Now, people pay big bucks to have jeans with holes.  Hey, just buy a regular pair and give them four years—bam—another cool “unkept” look.  And you save a few bucks.  Another “unkept” look that is popular with the “we don’t own an iron” crowd is the wrinkled look.  You just grab your shirt or whatever and throw it on and you are in. Again, totally cool—totally in.

I’ve even seen this in yards.  There are folks who have unkept yards because they just don’t like to mow grass or trim their yards but there is another group that simply loves that look.  To them unkept is “unkept—the cool kind.”  To some folks an “unkept” yard is all about nature.  I really liked that when I was young—my Daddy did not.  It just wasn’t his thing.

So, what’s up?  Well, through the years different things have come and gone.  It’s just the way culture works.  Things are fashionable for a while, and they move on.  I know there was a time I couldn’t imagine preaching without a tie.  I even said one time that I didn’t think I could preach without a tie.  Nowadays, I usually preach with an open collar.  Things change.  Right now, “unkept” is cool and one day it probably won’t be and I’m good with it either way.  But wait.

While “unkept” is cool, fashion wise…it is not cool or healthy to like an “unkept” life.  You ask, “What is that?”  It is a life that is lived solely in the moment.  In the sixties it was the “if it feels good, do it” thing and each decade has had its version of that thought pattern.  But the bottom line is that when we live “unkept” lives there are usually consequences and regrets.  I said this morning to my wife Judy that “success is not accidental, it is intentional.”  That almost sounds deep.  I also think that God’s peace, and joy, and happiness, and a host of other things that make life worth living aren’t accidental either…they are intentional.

For me, as a Jesus follower, that intentionality involves checking in with God on a regular basis to see what He thinks about my day…my life.  For me it is a daily dose of His Book, the Bible. Trust me on this one…there is a reason why it remains one of the best-selling books of all time.  The truths and teachings of Jesus are found in the second part, the New Testament, and they were groundbreaking two thousand years ago and they still are today.

Ok, so I don’t know if I will ever do the “unkept” thing or not.  It took me a long time to figure out I could teach without a tie.  But I do know this. When it comes to life, a “kept” life is just better—fewer consequences—fewer regrets.  That is probably why the Book says, “Guard your heart above all else, for it is the source of life.” God really wants what is best for us…He loves us that much.  If you find yourself in an “unkept” mess, just remember that He is there waiting and no matter what it is, “He’s got this.”