Category: friends

Posted in Family, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, loving others, prayer, Scripture, thankful, travel, Trials

Grateful Grieving

Posted on by Dewayne Taylor

Enter His gates with thanksgiving and His courts with praise. Give thanks to Him and bless His name.” Psalm 100:4

I guess I knew it…but I forgot.  Cruising (like in a big ship) isn’t for everybody but after trying it, I discovered I was a fan. Oh, it has its drawbacks—like spending a week with 3,000 people you don’t know but it also has plenty of positives. One that surprised me was the lessons that you can learn…while eating dinner in the middle of the sea.

The dinner service on a cruise is amazing—as is the food.  During our time on the ship, we had the same servers each night.  We had two young men who served as our primary servers and another guy who was in charge of all the servers. The guy in charge was nice enough but I noticed that when he was at the table, he was always looking somewhere else. It seemed his mouth and eyes were sending different messages.  The other two guys told a whole different tale. We became well acquainted, and we learned a bit about their lives. The number one thing I learned was that I am grateful I am not a server on a cruise ship.  They were both from Indonesia and it turns out they work for seven months straight with no days off before going home for two months—but then without pay.  They worked hard and they worked long…until they didn’t.

One evening we were chatting, and the topic somehow came to the COVID outbreak.  I knew the cruise lines, along with the rest of the world, shut down. But that night I had a bigger, clearer perspective.  The server guy said, they sent him home with no pay, no benefits, no anything—for TWO years. Imagine that.  I asked what he did, and he said whatever he could find, including selling ice cream on the street. I was shocked that the cruise line didn’t at least attempt to care for those who were so loyal to them.  I grieved for them and what they went through but something else happened—it made me grateful. I was grateful that I could work.

I was also grateful that I lived in America and even though it was a wacky time, I knew help of some sort was close by.  I knew that my church would be there for me if needed and I knew God was there 24/7—ready and able to help me. I re-learned a valuable lesson—that hearing someone else’s story can often help us become more grateful.  This week when we are focusing on being thankful, perhaps we should take the time to look and listen at the lives and stories of others.  We might discover an opportunity to not only help—but to learn—learn to be thankful to a God who always says, “I’ve got this.”  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, loving others, priorities, Scripture, Southern born, thankful, Thanksgiving, travel

The Rock

Posted on by Dewayne Taylor

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights.” James 1:17

The Rock.  If you talk to someone that has done “hard time” they will probably think you are talking about Alcatraz.  If you talk to someone who likes action movies, they will probably think you are talking about Dewayne “The Rock” Johnson.  But if you are talking to me or my wife Judy, then we will know you are talking about “the rock.”  It’s a long story.

Judy and I met and fell in love in short order.  I walked into her church one Wednesday night. I asked her out the next week and ever since then we have been a “we”.  We were together as much as possible—we wanted to be together as much as possible. Since my Daddy had passed away that summer, Mama decided to spend Thanksgiving with my brother Joe up in the mountains, and I was invited to come join them.  It was a deal because I really wanted to be with Judy, but I knew my place was with family and my Mama especially.  So, I went.  I told Judy I would miss her, and I would bring her something back from the mountains.

Now I’m known for doing crazy things—it’s just me. While in the mountains I tried to think of something to take to Judy.  It didn’t seem appropriate to take her a typical souvenir, so I got an idea.  I would take her part of the mountains. I went out and found a rock. It was about the size of a pumpkin roll…elongated and was even orange with white stripes. As Thanksgiving rocks go…it was a pretty, good one.  I washed it up and put it in the car.  Game. Set. Match.

I’m sure in the book of love étiquette there is a chapter on what to bring your love when you go to the mountains.  I am also sure if I had read that chapter a rock would not have made the cut.  But hey, I was inexperienced.  So, I got back to Valdosta where I was stationed in the Air Force and where Judy lived.  After the appropriate number of hugs and kisses I presented her with her gift.  She seemed thrilled and seemed to appreciate my thoughtfulness.  Please note the word seemed.

Time goes by.  We were married a while later and the rock made the trip from her parent’s house to our new apartment.  We later received orders to Germany and the rock made the trip with us.  When we came home from Germany and moved to our new duty assignment in Warrensburg, Missouri, the rock came with us. And on and on it went.  To the home we built in Warrensburg, to the little parsonage in LaMonte, where I had my first full-time pastorate, to Cobden, Illinois where we pastored for 14 years.  Finally, it came with us to Harrisburg. It was part of the family. It was more than a pet rock it was “the rock.”

About ten years ago, around 2010, somehow the topic of the rock came up. I was sharing how endeared I was to the rock—how important it was and then it happened.  Judy told me she never liked the rock.  She told me that she wasn’t thrilled all those years ago. She only pretended to be thrilled to make me happy.  The bottom line was the rock was just a rock.  Oh, the agony.  Oh, the pain. Oh the “you’ve got to be kidding me.”  Here I’ve been hauling this rock all over the world for nothing.  I knew I should have gotten her one of those Smoky Mountain snow globes!

Well, like a pet who’s forgotten how to be potty trained, the rock was moved to the yard. It was still special to me, so it now sits on the grave of one of my favorite pets.  Somehow that just seemed appropriate and if I were to move tomorrow—yes, the rock would go.  If nothing else, it is a monument on what not to bring the girl you love from the mountains.  I’m glad that God is better at gifts than I am.  It seems—no, it more than seems, that He always gets it right.

He talks a lot about gifts in His Book.  He loads us up day after day.  Every sunrise and sunset are a gift.  Every breath is a gift.  Every fall leaf that floats to the ground full of color is a gift.  We need to look and recognize all that He gives us.  James, one of Jesus’ half-brothers, wrote that every good gift, every perfect gift comes down from our Dearest Daddy.  He just loves to shower us with His best and He does it again and again.

Well, it was no accident that I brought a souvenir rock home that year, it was no accident it was orange with white stripes, and it was no accident that it is still with us. In fact, the word souvenir is from the French, meaning “a memento, keepsake, or a token of remembrance which a person acquires for the memories the owner associates with it.” How about that! Still, I guess it wasn’t the right gift for her on that day. Today though, it was the right motivation to remind us of this year, above all years, to be grateful for a God, a Heavenly Father who is oh so generous to His kids.  Why not sit down today and make a list of all the things God has provided and all the needs He met?  Take your time…enjoy the moment and when you are done…read the list to Him and say “Thank-you, Father.”  And then for all the things that are bigger than you or for the things that just look like rocks, gratefully give them all to Him because, as always, He’s got this.     Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Christmas, Family, forgiveness, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, loving others, missions, Scripture, thankful, travel, Trials, wisdom

Oops

Posted on by Dewayne Taylor

We must pay more careful attention, therefore, to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away.” Hebrews 2:1

I should have paid closer attention.  This past week our church took its annual trip to Atlanta to work at the Operation Christmas Child distribution center.  Samaritan’s Purse heads up this amazing ministry that encourages people to pack a shoebox with toys, toiletries, and the like.  The boxes are then collected and shipped around the world to kids everywhere…last year 10 million of them! To the kids it is the greatest gift ever.  But the best part is that each box contains the story of Jesus and how much He loves them.  Every child loves the gifts, but many also hear about Jesus for the first time and love Him too.

So, we take a day and travel on our church bus from Southern Illinois down to Atlanta.  We work a full day at the processing center preparing the boxes to be shipped and then the next day we travel home.  It is a busy three days and frankly the day we work at the processing center is a long, but wonderful, day.  The travel days are easy thanks to our great bus driver Brent.  Brent is on staff at our church, and He loves people, loves Jesus, and loves to drive!

Well, we left early, really early, Tuesday morning and travelled all day before arriving in Atlanta in the late afternoon.  After we checked into our hotel rooms we loaded back up on the bus and went to a mall that was close to the hotel to get supper.  We went our separate ways but several of us ended up at a Greek restaurant.  It was good.  We took our time enjoying the meal and soon it was time for us to leave.  My wife Judy was going to pay our bill and I told her I was going to go to the restroom.  Having not been there before I looked for the sign and headed in that direction.  It was down a small hallway.  I only saw one sign and it said men, so in I went.

No one else was in the restroom and in just a minute I was ready to leave.  When I opened the door, a lady from our team was just about to push the door open.  I looked at her and she looked at me…something wasn’t right.  My first thought was that she obviously was confused and was going into the wrong restroom.  But then I had a thought.  It was odd that the restroom didn’t have the usual equipment you find in a men’s restroom.  And then it hit me. Oh no!

Well, I blurted out to her, “Am I in the wrong restroom?” And she confirmed my worst nightmare…I was.  Fortunately, I knew her and fortunately no one else was in there, I began to apologize all over myself.  Crazily, in my 69 years of life, this had happened two other times—both years ago.  Each time, I wanted to die.  This case was no different.  I swore her to secrecy but then realized this was too good of a story to pass by.  The big question is how in the world do you end up where you don’t belong?  That’s a great question.  In my case the signage just wasn’t clear, and I was tired, and I just wasn’t paying attention.  Put those three together and know that social disaster is right around the corner.

Maybe you have never gone in the wrong restroom, but perhaps you’ve headed the wrong way on a one-way street. It’s frightening when you’re seeing headlights and you’re supposed to be seeing taillights. It is one thing when we accidentally go in the wrong direction, but too many times we find ourselves in the wrong place—by choice.  The wrong movie, the wrong relationship, the wrong side of the law, or more importantly, on the wrong side of God’s Word.  Truth be known it happens way too often.  And it usually happens when we get tired, or busy, or sloppy, in our faith.  In my case there really were no consequences besides my being incredibly embarrassed, but that is not always the case.  Too often our sloppiness ends up in broken lives, broken marriages, and broken hearts.

The Bible has a lot to say about wisdom and staying on the right path. It says, “We must pay more careful attention, therefore, to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away.”  If I had been paying careful attention, I would have noticed that the sign was intended for the other door…not the one I took.  If I hadn’t been sloppy, I could have passed on a very embarrassing moment. Well, they say that hindsight is 20/20.  So, what about it?  Are we willing to watch where we go and where we step?  I think you will find that it is just the wise thing to do.  And, by the way, when we do mess up, well, it’s good to know that His grace really is sufficient and to know that always, He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, friends, gratitude, life, priorities, Scripture, thankful, travel

Hold Those Grits

Posted on by Dewayne Taylor

And my God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:19

Supply chain issues—it seems it is everywhere. There were a lot of crazy things that came out of the COVID mess.  In fact, the sane list is very, very short.  I do know in our church our new Wednesday night gatherings are a big hit and it all happened because of COVID and all its circumstances. Can someone say, “Yuk?”  Anyway, one of my least favorites was the craziness with supply chain issues.  We would go to stores, and this was out of stock and that was out of stock.  Honestly, it seemed there was more out than in. Remember the dozens (or hundreds) of ships that were anchored out in the bay off the coast of California?

Things are some better, but it does seem that there are still some things that get choked up somewhere. Sometimes it is still things like bread or milk and sometimes it is things like building supplies.  And then, sometimes it is things like Grits—not the fine Southern cuisine but the kind that I write, and you read.  You remember about a month ago we had to take a couple of weeks off from Grits because we were going to England for a mission trip/vacation.  Well, here we go again.

We had previously scheduled (as in long before our England trip) a cruise and as it turned out they are pretty close together and as it turns out we are just not going to have time to write and publish enough stories to cover those days. So, we are going to publish this week, through Friday, but we won’t be publishing the next week, November 13-17.  And this time the boat causing the problem won’t be parked off the coast of California but rather it will be floating somewhere in the Southern Caribbean.

So be sure and visit our website, http://www.gritswithgrace.com and remember all our stories from the past three and a half years are there. You can search by keywords, topics, or scriptures. This should be our last supply chain holdup this year…but hey, who knows. These are crazy days…can someone say COVID?  So, God bless you guys, thanks for being faithful readers and we will be back before you can say, “salt and butter only.”  Oh, and remember this, God never has a supply chain issue.  He got this…always. Bro. Dewayne

Posted in fear, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, loving others, missions, prayer, priorities, Scripture, sovereignty of God, thankful, travel, Trials

Chilled to the Bone

Posted on by Dewayne Taylor

And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.” 2 Corinthians 9:8

If it wasn’t the coldest night of my life…it was close.  Back in 2008 we began a journey of doing mission work in West Africa.  While I had traveled to several, and some would say many, countries nothing compared to West Africa.  Even a trip to the third world part of Bulgaria with the Roma people couldn’t compare.  When we arrived in Niamey, Niger late one night, I thought I and my teammates had landed on the far side of the moon.  It was that different. Rarely am I had a loss for words, but that trip like no other caused me to appreciate my home country but also the people and places on a continent called Africa.

Niger is in what is called Sub-Saharan Africa.  The Sahara Desert is a stone’s throw from Niger’s capital city.  After we had taken a day to acclimate, we headed north into the desert to a small town literally in the middle of nowhere.  We were visiting with a couple of single guys who were living there and doing some work with the local people.  The goal was to share with the people about someone many of them had never heard about.  That someone was Jesus.  We were really limited to what we could do, but we did prayer walking and would try and talk with some of the folks through an interpreter.  It was incredible.

On the eight-hour drive into the desert (and keep in mind we flew for hours and hours to even get to Niger) our missionary casually mentioned that we would need to buy some blankets because it was likely to be cold at night.  I laughed.  If you are like me you think Africa and the Sahara and then you think hot, dry and then hot again.  I told her I doubted very seriously that I would get cold.  She just smiled.  Late in the afternoon we arrived at Tchin-Tabaraden.  In case you are wondering I am pretty sure we could see the end of the world just outside of town. Smile.

We had a great time talking with the two guys that lived there and before long it was time to set up our sleeping arrangements.  We were going to sleep out in the courtyard.  There was a small house, but we chose to sleep under the stars.  We set our cots up and each one of us had a blanket.  I was sure I wouldn’t need mine, but being the team player I hung on to it.  Before long, it was dark…really dark.  There was no running water and no electricity.  After a while we decided it was time to settle down for our long winter’s nap.  It seemed just a bit cooler.

Soon the stars were simply brilliant. I am sure there are places in America without light pollution that really shows off the stars.  With that said, there is simply nothing as beautiful as the stars above Africa.  Then, slowly a huge full moon came up over the horizon. If you can imagine it, it was almost too bright to sleep, and I am not kidding. Then it happened.

It?  What was it?  It was the desert cold.  Slowly, almost without warning, the dry “winter” air settled in.  In just a few minutes I had spread the blanket lightly over me.  In another few minutes, I had tucked the blanket around me.  A little later I was trying to figure out how to put the blanket under me and over me.  Apparently, there was too much of me and too little blanket.  Then, well then, I just got bone chilling, you’ve got to be kidding me, am I really in Africa, COLD.  Let me just say, I spent a large part of that night wishing for daylight.  Oh, how I couldn’t wait to see my old friend the sun.  It was the coldest night I have ever spent.

Finally, at about the 4:30 in the morning the mosque right across the street began the first call of prayer for the day.  Of course, I had long beaten them to the punch.  I had been praying since about midnight for the sun to come up.  I figured if Joshua could pray for the sun to stand still, maybe I could pull off it coming up early.  Nope.  When the sun did come up and began to warm the compound, the first thing I did was apologize to the missionary for doubting her forecast of a chilly night.

Ironically, that wasn’t quite the end of the story.  For our second night at the compound, we decided we would cram into the little house where certainly it would at least be warmer.  Well, the joke was on us.  Just like that, the weather turned and that night in the little house, no one used a blanket.  In fact…it was downright warm…too warm. After the freezing night and then the too warm night, back-to-back, you might be wondering would I go back?  Well, the answer is absolutely.  Over the years, it has been my privilege to return time and again and each time the blessings far outweigh the hardships. No contest. I long for the day when my feet will be on African soil once again, sharing the Good News.

We have made wonderful friendships, experienced many diversified cultures, and seen countless people come to know Christ as Savior.  We have seen more than a few miracles and watched as God changed lives—most notably the fair skinned men and women from America.  I am sure it is impossible to go on a trip like this and not be changed.  It has a tendency to put things like we have experienced recently in perspective.  We whine because bathroom tissue is out of stock.  Go to West Africa…they don’t even have bathrooms.  Smile.

Well, there you go. As we enter this most wonderful time of the year, be sure and be thankful for all the blessings you have.  Paul, a guy who wrote a bunch of the New Testament in the Bible said, “And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.” That’s right, Paul.

You see, many of those people who lived in Tchin-Tabaraden didn’t face one cold night, or warm night, they experienced them all and without a blanket or the air conditioning humming quietly.  We are indeed blessed. The old hymn says, “Count your blessings, name them one by one.”  That is good advice and there is nothing like a trip to a third-world country to help you do it.  I am grateful that we never travel alone.  Our Dearest Daddy goes with us each time.  He provides rest in the midst of restless nights and no matter the obstacle or hardship, we know, “He’s got this.” Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, food, friends, Grace, life, priorities, Scripture, thankful

Slow Down Horsey

Posted on by Dewayne Taylor

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable—if there is any moral excellence and if there is anything praiseworthy—dwell on these things.” Philippians 4:8

I once knew a guy who was one of the fastest eaters I have ever seen.  If we were having a meal at church, he would get low and close to his plate and begin to shovel the food in.  It was amazing. I know at my house when I was growing up, we had to learn to eat fast too. With so many mouths to feed sometimes there was just enough to go around. You know, five people, six biscuits. Five people, seven pieces of chicken.  So, the bottom line was, if you wanted seconds, you better be the first one finished.

I heard a story once about a family just like mine and they too were having chicken. Well, there were five people and six pieces of chicken, and everyone got their piece. A few minutes after they started eating, the lights went out and when they came back there was a hand on the last piece of chicken with five forks stuck in it! Sometimes it just pays to be fast—but not always.

I don’t know why it is but when I am reading the Bible during my morning Jesus time, I tend to speed and skip through the text.  It seems to mostly occur when I know the text well. If it is John 3:16 I sometimes get the “For God so loved” and the next thing I know I’m reading, “everlasting life” and I totally miss all the good stuff in the middle.  Strange.

It also happens with verses that have a list.  Verses like Galatians 5:22-23 that list the nine fruit of the Spirit suddenly become a list of two or three.  I might get love and joy but rarely make it the last one which is self-control. Oh, and guess what?  One of the things that I seem to always be lacking on is—self-control.  No surprise there. The other verse that I can’t seem to get in my head is Philippians 4:8. Paul, the guy who wrote a big chuck of the New Testament, gives us a list of things to think on—like, “whatever is true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable.” Now that’s a great list—if you take the time to read it.

Let me suggest that we learn to slow down—whether it be at the table and especially when it comes to the Word of God.  We can’t learn it and apply it if we don’t take the time to fully read it. So, rather than worrying about who gets the last piece of chicken or the last biscuit—just enjoy the one you have.  When it comes to reading the Word, go ahead and hit the brakes.  If you need some lessons on braking, just ask the One who knows all about—our Heavenly Father.  Remember, He gave us the Sabbath to slow us down, so you know—He’s got this. Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, food, forgiveness, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, loving others, prayer, priorities, Scripture, Southern born, thankful, Thanksgiving

Bring on the Gravy

Posted on by Dewayne Taylor

In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that He lavished on us with all wisdom and understanding.” Ephesians 1:7-8

It just makes good things better!  Just imagine…Thanksgiving is right around the corner. For most it will be a time together with family and friends— to rejoice and remember.  I know from this side of the fence the Taylor cooks are off the scale good.  Our menu, especially the one that lists the side dishes, is almost set in stone.  Homemade (is there any other) mac and cheese, sweet potato casserole, strawberry pretzel salad and other salads that makes you like salads, Apple pie…well you get the idea.  There is one thing that deserves more recognition at our Thanksgiving table and that is the gravy.

Now I am a Southern boy and gravy has always been a big part of my eating life.  Momma would regularly make both brown and white gravies for our supper and they were incredible.  I remember one time I was reminded that you can have too much of a good thing.  When she cooked a roast I loved to take two slices (one wouldn’t do) of bread and then smother, no drown, the bread in gravy.  Well, one time it got me.  I guess all the goodness in the gravy was too much and I got sick, real sick to my stomach.  It wasn’t pretty.

Momma also made a great giblet gravy at Thanksgiving.  She would take all those things that are tucked inside the turkey when you buy it, cut them up in tiny pieces and put them in her gravy.  Yup…it was incredible.  That’s when I began to learn the value of gravy.  It could take the driest dressing (never my Momma’s mind you) and make it the best dressing in the world.  It worked even better on leftovers.  You go back later that afternoon, fill your plate for round two of the feast, warm up the gravy and let her fly.  The dressing, the potatoes and the turkey all were reborn with a little gravy.

Gravy also can play the role of redeemer with biscuits.  Now even the best biscuits almost always need a little help to become great.  It might be a smothering of butter or butter and syrup and good becomes great.  By far the best soul mate of a biscuit is a flood of good sausage gravy.  On my goodness—that combination is its own food group.  Any good restaurant that serves breakfast is always sure to include that in its offerings. The bottom line is that gravy makes things better.

I know something else that does the same thing—even more so.  That is grace.  Grace is when we choose to extend something good to someone they really don’t deserve.  It might be an act of kindness, a measure of forgiveness or a kind word or two. As a pastor I know people have extended a measure of grace when they commented on some of my sermons.  “Best sermon this year, preacher!”  Well, truth be known it wasn’t that good—they were just being graceful.

Now hear this.  Just like a good gravy can make ordinary or less than extraordinary food taste incredible—grace can do the same thing for life.  Families are stronger, relationships are better, teams at work are more productive when grace is poured all over them.  You probably can remember how political opinions and COVID fractured relationships like crazy.  It divided families, friends and, yes, churches. Looking back, I know we needed to pour some gravy—some grace—all over it.

If you are a Jesus follower then you should be a grace expert.  You know that God extended that grace, His unmerited favor, to you and forgave all your failures, sins, and warts.  If you understand redemption right you know you didn’t deserve it—He just did it because of His love for broken people.  Grace makes the impossible possible.  Grace, like a good gravy, can redeem the worse and restore the driest.  God talks a whole lot about grace in His Book.  I encourage you to Google it and be amazed at grace—God’s grace.  It is so amazing they even wrote a song about.  Perhaps you’ve heard it—Amazing Grace.

Sometimes when I order at a restaurant, I will order my gravy on the side. Let’s be honest—not every place can make good gravy.  But when it comes to God’s grace don’t ever get it on the side.  Just ask God to pour it on heavy—flood the plate of your life. The Book says that through faith in Jesus we have redemption through His death on the cross.  When we believe that God forgives our sins through His grace that He lavishes on us…. wow bring on the gravy…bring on the grace. So, if your life is like a dry biscuit take a break and ask God to pour on the grace.  And if you are overwhelmed by circumstances that have left you like a 3:00 pm pile of dry turkey, ask God to pour on grace and you will soon be revived because…He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, friends, Grace, life, love, loving others, prayer, Scripture, sovereignty of God, Trials

Approval-itis

Posted on by Dewayne Taylor

As the Father has loved Me, I have also loved you. Remain in My love.” John 15:9

If He can’t, why am I surprised that I can’t? Do you know what still amazes me?  Creation…and not just part of it…all of it.  I’m amazed when I stop and look at a spring flower.  I’m amazed that the sun rises and sets day after day.  I’m amazed that my heart beats about 75 times a minute.  That is, wait for it, 108,000 times a day.  In case you are interested that is 39,420,000 times a year.  And, so far, it’s done well for 69 years.  Oh, and I’m amazed that out of all the galaxies, solar systems, and planets—zillions of them—only one can support life as we know it.  Earth.  And it is no accident.  It is an intentional act of creation.

God is really good at creating things.  He made us.  The Bible says that we are “fearfully and wonderfully made.” Another place in the Bible He says we are His masterpieces.  Now some are Rembrandt’s, and some are Picasso’s, but we are all masterpieces.  Handcrafted by the Creator of the universe—a “one of a kind” miracle. I know He made me with a few quirks and several warts and that is the point of this story…one of my quirky warts.

You see, from the time I was a little kid I have wanted people to like me.  I have craved approval from the time I can remember.  Whether it was from my Momma and Daddy, my brothers or sisters or the guy who picked up our garbage…I wanted approval.  Let me tell you if you are going to have a quirk wart…there are a lot better ones than this one.  The problem with “approval-itis—the need for people’s approval” is that it leads to a far worse disease—the passion, the drive to please people.  Now if I lived out in Montana where my nearest neighbor was 20 miles away, this wouldn’t be such a big problem.  But my life revolves around people—I am a pastor for goodness’ sake.  And to be honest, I want everyone to be happy and I want every one of them to like me. Sigh.

To be clear…the deal isn’t their deal…oh, no it lands right in my lap. The wart with all its bumps is right here.  For years I have been learning, or trying to learn, that I will not ever, never, please everyone.  But like an alcoholic craves the bottle—so we people pleasers crave approval.  And, by the way, I’ve gotten a little better.  Now, if I’m driving down the street and I wave at someone and they don’t wave back, I don’t write down their license plates and put a contract out on them. Smile.

If you can identify in any small way with “approval-itis” I have some good news.  It is sure to help you.  No, it is not seeking counseling and paying someone $125 dollars an hour to tell you that you can’t please everyone.  No, it is not moving to Montana…that wouldn’t work anyway because you would think the horse didn’t like you!  No, it is something that I read in one of my devotions the other morning. It is a simple truth.  Are you ready?  Here it is, “You can’t please everybody.  Even God couldn’t please everybody.”  Now isn’t that just profound…and true.  I mean God is like all powerful, all wise, all knowing and can be everywhere at the same time and a majority of the world is always mad at him.  How about that?

Think about it.  If God couldn’t pull it off, then who am I to think that I can? I guess God could snap His celestial fingers and make everyone like Him, but He has this thing about free will.  He doesn’t want to make people love Him—He wants them to love Him because they want too.  Because.They.Want.To. He loved us so much that He gave His only Son to die on a Roman cross and He did it knowing that many…maybe most…would never even respond.  Amazing.

So, here’s the deal.  I understand that I will never please everyone…probably not even a fraction of the people I bump into.  I can’t do that, but I can do this.  I can love like Jesus loved. He said, “As the Father has loved me, I have also loved you. Remain in my love.” He was saying, “Hey, when it comes to loving people…I’m all in. Sit back and enjoy it.”  I can give my best not because a person will respond like I want, but rather because that is what my Dearest Daddy wants me to do.  And guess what?  His approval is the only approval that matters.  We should live, love and long for the audience of One—Jesus.

Well, truth be told, I won’t get this one right in this lifetime because I probably won’t live that long—like a million years.  But with His help I can be more like Him, every day.  Love God, love people.  It’s that simple.  If you are “plum wore out” from “approval-itis,” well, why don’t you just take a rest.  You can, you know—because He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, loving others, priorities, Scripture, thankful, travel

Sports Card Heaven

Posted on by Dewayne Taylor

I love those who love Me, and those who seek Me diligently find Me.” Proverbs 8:17

Well, it sure wasn’t my thing.  Until a couple of years ago, each November we tried to take a short vacation with the Guest tribe.  Their tribe consists of my oldest daughter, Becca, her husband, Jonathan and three of my grandchildren, Faith (and her husband Dalton) Hope and Ethan.  It’s usually a three or four-day trip to the Smoky Mountains but this year the tour guide, Becca, decided we would go to Branson, Missouri.  So, over the river and through the woods we went, and we all ended up in that Southwest Missouri vacation mecca.

The first day we went shopping before heading to the Sights and Sounds theater to see a production on the life of Jesus—more on that in another Grits. Shopping just isn’t my thing.  We got to the outdoor mall and the boys went one way and the girls went another.  I figured my chances were better with the guys.  I mean whatever they wanted to look at had to beat girl stuff.  Well, Jonathan and Ethan eat, sleep, and breathe sports so naturally our shopping selections curved in that direction.  The first stop was a shop that specialized in hats and shirts for the various team sports.  We poked around for a while, liking this one and trashing another one—you know, the right team, wrong team thing.  Soon, it was time to move on.

So down the mall a way, there was another sports shop called, “On the Ball Sports.” This store sold a good variety of sports memorabilia.  It’s funny…neither store sold the tools of the trade but rather things that indicated what team or player you liked.  We entered “sports heaven” and it was soon apparent that this was not going to be a short visit.  We were there for the long haul, and it wasn’t what you might think that held us there.  It wasn’t jerseys or hats; it wasn’t pictures or mugs—it was sports cards. I’m not even sure of the official name but they had guys, or mostly guys, pictures on them and described who and when they played.

It turned out that I discovered my grandson Ethan was totally into sports cards.  This store had a very large selection and the young man working there was helpful and friendly.  We looked and looked and then we looked some more.  I discovered there might be, oh, a zillion cards for each player and based on their popularity and condition, they could be quite valuable.  The most expensive card we saw was worth $850 dollars.  I’m not sure why.  I asked a lot of questions and got lots of answers but quickly determined I should stay with my day job and try some other investments.

Well, two days later, ok, that is an exaggeration, about an hour and a half later, we walked out of the store.  While I had to take a couple of breaks from “card heaven” I did manage to stay there even though the Bass Pro Shop was next door.  You might ask, “Dewayne, why didn’t you just go next door.  Why did you stay in the card shop for so long if it wasn’t your thing?”  Well, the answer really is quite simple.  While it wasn’t my thing…it was my grandson’s thing, and I learned a long time ago that we should learn to love the things that those we love… love.  Did you track with that?

Well, it goes like this.  If you don’t like to shop but your wife does, you learn to love shopping.  And, on the other hand, ma’am if your husband loves to fish, you might want to give it a try. And here is the great part.  When you do that, you are showing love.  The whole tribe made jokes about my stint in “card heaven” for the rest of the trip.  It was fun and it kept the memory alive.  Into the days, weeks, and months, I’m sure we will occasionally remember our time together in “card heaven.”  Oh, and guess what Ethan is getting for Christmas.  I promise you it is something he loves.

What is true in our human world is also true in our spiritual world.  If you happen to be a Jesus follower, one of the surest ways to a close and personal relationship with Him is to learn to love the things that He loves.  And the amazing thing is the things He loves always make life better and they never carry any regrets or consequences.  It is like following a guide who always knows the best fishing holes, the best golf courses, or the best places to hike.  It is always…good.

Solomon, one of the smartest guys to ever live, wrote about God. Writing for God, he said, “I love those who love Me, and those who seek Me diligently find Me.” Just like the time I spent leaning over the counter with my grandson, it is valuable to spend time with Him, leaning at the counter of life, asking questions, learning, and loving what He loves.  Yup, it is always…good.  And why not take it a step further and just believe and trust…even if you don’t understand, that, “He’s got this.”   Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, loving others, prayer, priorities, Scripture, thankful, travel, Trials

Seeing Isn’t Always Believing

Posted on by Dewayne Taylor

And he looked up and said, “I see men, but they look like trees, walking.” Mark 8:24

He was still there the next morning.  A while back, a couple of really awesome friends allowed us to use their camper for a whole week.  It was a pastor appreciation thing even though I haven’t been their pastor for a long time.  But trust me…we sure appreciated it.  Now I need to tell you this wasn’t one of those camper campers—this was one of those fancy ones—the kind that moves you from camping to glamping.  They set it up for us in a beautiful campground in the Land Between the Lakes.  The leaves were falling, the weather was “fallish”, and we were two happy campers…no pun intended.

One evening I went out to find my car covered with a healthy crop of wet leaves.  With nothing important to do at the time, I begin picking the leaves off my car.  There were lots of different kinds of leaves.  As I worked my way around the car, I found something unusual on the driver’s side rear door.  It was a small stick about three inches long and it was stuck to the side of the door.  I thought that was kind of odd, so I took a closer look.  What I saw was what appeared to be one of those insects that look like a stick.  It had a small head and several joints down its body. It was amazing.  I said, “Hey Judy, come look at this cool insect.  It looks just like a stick.”

Well, she came over and took a look and she said, “Are you sure that is an insect?”  I assured her that it was since I am an amateur entomologist.  Oh, in case you are wondering, that is someone who studies insects.  I know because I looked it up.  So, me, the amateur entomologist, left this fine specimen of the insect world to spend the night on my car.  I really couldn’t believe she had questioned my judgment.  After all, what does she know about entomology anyway?  Well, apparently a lot.

The next morning, we were leaving. As I carried our stuff out to the car, I took the time to pick the remaining leaves off my car and guess what?  My stick friend was still there.  I told Judy, “Hey that stick insect is still on the car.  How cool is that?”  She gave me that “Are you sure it isn’t a stick” look and I gave her the “I know what I am talking about” look.  There was only one way to prove to her that I knew what I was talking about.  It was time for the touch test.  I went over to the car and looked again at my friend.  Head.  Check. Body. Check.  Legs.  Well, real small looking legs, but check.  So, I gave it a poke.  It fell off the car.

Yup.  I hate to admit it, but it was a stick.  I had to do the hard thing but the right thing. I went in and told Judy, “Hey you know that stick insect?  It was a stick.”  How about that?  I tried to lightly brush it off but no, I got a full load of the “I told you so” looks.  The bottom line was, she was right.  She knew her sticks and I obviously didn’t know my insects.  I think it is kinda funny that something I thought that was supposed to look like a stick really was.  No wonder it didn’t move all night.  I guess those weren’t legs after all.

I realized that morning that not everything that looks like a stick insect is in fact, a stick insect—it might just indeed be a stick.  Things are not always as they appear.  Seeing sometimes is not believing.  Our eyes can deceive us.  Our hearts can deceive us. Our minds can deceive us. Things can be deceiving.

There is a cool scripture about Jesus healing a guy who was blind.  Jesus touched his eyes and said, “What do you see?”  The man said, “I see men, but they look like trees walking.”  Well, Jesus touched his eyes again and basically said, “What about now?”  And guess what?  He could see just fine.  Now obviously the man wasn’t seeing trees walking but that is what he thought he could see.  In a world where things are upside-down, we should take the time and carefully examine something before we buy into it.  If I had poked that stick sooner, I would have discovered the truth sooner.  Things are not always as they appear.

However, there is One we can trust who is always spot on and that is God.  He is the real deal and the lens that we view Him is through His Word.  Don’t trust what people say about God—read it for yourself.  God gave us His Word to show Himself to us and then invites every person to read for themselves.  And how often do you get to talk to the Author while you read His book? That’s pretty cool.  And if you choose to read about Him, you will be amazed at what you find.  You won’t find a God that looks like a god.  You will find a God that is God and Who can do what He says.  You will find a God who loves you—a lot.  You will find a God who is not afraid of our investigation of Him because He will stand any test.  So, go ahead.  Read up.  You will find the real deal.  A God that invites you to rest in Him.  A God who’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne