Posted in Family, fear, forgiveness, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, loving others, prayer, Scripture, Southern born, thankful, Trials

I Hated Him

And be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving one another, just as God also forgave you in Christ.” Ephesians 4:32

His name was Richard Jackson and I hated him. I know, I know…hate is a strong word, and you aren’t supposed to hate someone or anyone.  But lying is wrong too and the truth is…I hated him.  Besides all that I was in the eighth grade, so it was a long time ago and it was also before I decided to follow Jesus. I’ve wanted to write this story before, but I’ve always put it off…until today.

Anyone who knows anything can tell you that junior high, or middle school as they call it now, can be difficult…and mine was.  I never was in the cool crowd at school…I just didn’t make the cut. And add to that I was a little too short and a little too pudgy and I guess that just made me a target. Richard Jackson wasn’t in the cool group either he was in that nether land where people go who aren’t really nerdy but aren’t cool either.  In another world, Richard Jackson would be a target like me…but he wasn’t.

Richard Jackson wasn’t a target because he was the one who targeted others.  By a twist of fate, he was big, real big.  I’m not sure if he was big because of his DNA or the fact that he probably spent too many years in the eighth grade.  Regardless, he was big and for whatever reason, when he looked for someone to push around and bully, he found me.  We didn’t share classes, we didn’t live in the same neighborhood, and we sure didn’t go to the same church.  Come to think about it, I’m sure Richard Jackson didn’t go to church.

Anyway, Richard Jackson, for most of my eighth-grade year made it his business to make me miserable. He would push and shove and threaten me almost daily.  To make matters worse, Richard Jackson had a lackey who would hang around him.  If Richard Jackson was big, Mark Williams wasn’t. He was skinny, almost scrawny, but all that didn’t matter because he belonged to Richard Jackson.  Well, Richard Jackson decided that Mark Williams should beat me up and one day he said just that. He promised to ride my bus and get off at my stop and pummel me.  That was a long day as I waited all day to get beat up.

Well, I got on the bus, they got on the bus and when it came to my bus stop…we all got off.  Richard Jackson instantly started in on me and at the same time encouraging his lackey to hit me.  Well, he did, square on the mouth and then we took to the ground and wrestled around a bit before it was all over.  Well, every day for months I would take my tongue and feel the large knot on my lip.  Every day for months I relived those few moments trying to make the outcome different.  It never was. To this day, I hate that day.

I think, though I am not sure, that soon after this Richard Jackson lightened up some.  In fact, by the time high school rolled around he was almost civil.  His lackey Mark Williams went somewhere…maybe parole school for all I know.  All I know is for a long time I allowed that day to define me.  For a long time, I allowed the fear of another bully showing up to cause me to live in fear.  And then finally, slowly, the fear disappeared but the scar remained.

As I write this, I still can feel the emotional pain that Richard Jackson and Mark Williams inflicted on me.  And, honestly, it wouldn’t be too hard for me to hate them all over again but then I realize that wouldn’t accomplish anything.  I’ve given them enough free rent in my brain already.  Besides all that since those days I had another important day—I met a Man who loved me enough to die for me.  I met a man who forgave me of everything I had ever done wrong.  I met a man who said since I have forgiven you don’t you think you should forgive him…forgive them.  And I realized He was right.  If I didn’t, I was no better than they were.

Is there a Richard Jackson or a Mark Williams in your past…for present?  Is there a scar on your heart the size of Texas because someone decided to put it there?  Maybe just maybe it is time to let it go.  Maybe it is time to forgive.  As I wrote this, I was amazed at the emotion that still lingers in my heart and in my memories and I realized this forgiveness thing isn’t as easy as it seems.  But that’s ok because the One who asked me to forgive stands ready to help me to forgive.  He stands there ready to help, whispering, “It’s ok, I’ve got this.”  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, loving others, prayer, priorities, Scripture, thankful, wisdom

At the Door

Look! I stand at the door and knock. If you hear My voice and open the door, I will come in, and we will share a meal together as friends.” Revelation 3:20

My doorbell can talk.  We are blessed at 217.  The original part of the house is well over a hundred years old. Back in those days it had a couple of bedrooms, a kitchen, a bathroom and probably a dining room.  Well, at the end of World War II a family bought it and totally remodeled it.  They added a living room, a couple more bedrooms and a breakfast area.  They took it from wood siding to brick and added a new front and rear entrance. And that is where my talking doorbell comes in.

I’ve always heard that backdoor friends are best and at our house that is the door we use and most of our guests use.  The front door is nice to look at, but it pretty much sits there looking pretty.  But just in case someone wants to use it, we have a doorbell there and at the backdoor.  Well, I’m not sure how it works but when that occasional someone comes to the front door and mashes the doorbell, inside we get a ding-dong sound.  But, when someone comes to the backdoor, we get a ding and skip the dong.  It’s a nice way to know which door to go to…if we can remember which is which.

For whatever reason, sometimes we don’t hear the doorbell, but we have a backup system.  On the front door we have a knocker and in the event, we don’t respond quickly enough, we get a rap, rap, rap. The back door is just a little more old-fashioned.  There the backup is a knock, knock, knock.  The important thing is that we know someone is at the door and would like to come in.

There is a scripture in the New Testament part of the Christian Bible that talks about knocking at the door.  It is found in the book of the Revelation, and it describes Jesus standing at a door and He is knocking…desiring to come in.  And the verse also says that if we are willing to open that door He would like to come in and have a visit.  For some folks, perhaps His visit would be for the first time.  He is saying, “Let Me come and be a part of your life.” For others, it is like a good friend coming for a visit—you know a cup of coffee and a piece of pie kind of visit.  Either way, He is courteous enough to wait for us to respond.

In today’s world, unannounced guests are not too common. In fact, show up unannounced and you might get a strange look or two.  But in the time of Jesus, guests are always expected and always welcomed.  It is just the way that it was.  In our busy, hurry-up world, we are often too busy to take the time for a visit—even from a man like Jesus.  Each time He knocks on the door, He brings more than He takes.  He isn’t there to bother but to love. He isn’t there to judge but to bless.  It is one visit you don’t want to miss.

I know each of us at one time or another, deliberately ignore the door.  We are either too tired, too busy, or too something else.  But the next time you hear the doorbell of your life, the next time you hear the knock, knock, knock at the door of life, I hope you will go and see who is standing there.  It just might be Jesus and a visit from Him is always worth the time.  Maybe you can settle down in the living room and chat a while…maybe share a few worries or concerns.  And then, because it is just what he does, He will smile and tell us not to worry because, as always, “He’s got this.” Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, forgiveness, friends, Grace, gratitude, Integrity, life, loving others, prayer, Scripture, sovereignty of God, thankful

Puff Graham

If you are faithful in little things, you will be faithful in large ones. But if you are dishonest in little things, you won’t be honest with greater responsibilities.” Luke 16:10

Puff Graham.  Those two words changed our world.  Many of us have heard of and admired Billy Graham.  He was a country boy who later became one of the world’s most renowned preachers.  His passion and love for God and people drew millions of people to hear what he had to say.  His message was simple—God loves you and he made it clear that if a person was willing to ask, God would forgive them and give them a home with Him in heaven.

Many books and plenty of documentaries have been written and made about Dr. Graham but one fact that amazes me is little known.  It was 1949 and he was out in Los Angeles conducting a series of revival meetings.  The crowds were good and the results incredible and the meetings when on for several weeks. Slowly, though, the meetings seemed to be losing momentum and I’m sure it crossed Billy Graham’s mind if it was time to move on.  About that time something happened.

One evening, as he approached the tent where the meeting was being held, he was amazed to find the largest crowd ever.  He wondered what had happened.  Well, what had happened was a two-word directive from publisher William Randolph Hearst.  The directive simply said, “Puff Graham.”  The directive ordered all of Hearst’s vast media holdings to start promoting the young evangelist. Almost overnight, Billy Graham attained “celebrity” status.

I suppose it would have been tempting for Dr. Graham to use that to promote himself but no…he used it only to promote the One he loved.  It is interesting that according to Dr. Graham, he really had no relationship with Hearst.  There was no real reason for this to happen except for one…the providence and sovereignty of God.  I believe God honored Billy Graham for his character and integrity.  He knew He could trust the young evangelist with success.  You see, the truth of the matter is riches are harder to handle than poverty and success is harder to handle than failure.

If we want God to bless us more then we need to be ready and able to handle those blessings.  The One who made us knows if we are ready to be “puffed” or not.  Jesus said, “If you are faithful in little things, you will be faithful in large ones. But if you are dishonest in little things, you won’t be honest with greater responsibilities.”  The story is told of a young man applying for a job.  After the interview, he and the man doing the interview went to the cafe for lunch.  The young man was first in line and the other man watch as he got a pat of butter and slipped it under his napkin so he wouldn’t be charged for it.  Well, he wasn’t charged, nor did he get the job.

“Puff Graham.” Two words that tell a big, big story.  Let’s be sure and be the kind of people that God can do whatever He wants in our lives.  Let’s live worthy of being “puffed” however that looks and whatever that means.  But let’s also be the kind of people who are willing to promote others.  Let’s look for opportunities to lift someone…even if it means not promoting ourselves.  One thing is certain.  We can trust God to do what is best for us and what is best for His Kingdom.  We can rest assured that, “He’s got this.” Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, forgiveness, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, prayer, Scripture, thankful, Trials

The Owner’s Closet

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends You and lead me along the path of everlasting life.” Psalm 139:23-24

It’s the one place.  My wife Judy is a really smart person and one day she proved that so clearly.  The place where we live has a two-bedroom apartment over the garage.  Off and on through the years, various members of the tribe have stayed there but finally it was just sitting empty.  Not only was it not earning its keep…it was costing us.  It has its own utilities so every month we wrote a check.  And then Judy had a great idea.  She researched and found out there was a pretty new company called Airbnb. It helps owners of properties rent them out as a short-term vacation type rental.  She wanted to give it a try…and she did.

On a shoestring budget and by watching several YouTube videos she turned that little apartment into a beautiful short-term rental.  I told her it wouldn’t work.  A couple of businessmen who attend our church told her it wouldn’t work.  After all, who comes to Harrisburg…a small town in Southern Illinois.  Well, we were all wrong and she was all right. Since 2016 when she opened for business, hundreds have stayed and instead of draining the check book, it now helps supplement our income.  Amazing.

People, book the place for a fee and we give them full access to the property.  They get the apartment, and trust me…it is very nice.  They also get to enjoy our beautiful garden (another Judy thing), the hot tub, and a nice patio area.  It is quite the deal if I say so myself.  Like I said…Judy had a really good idea. However, there is one place, one small room that the guests don’t have access to…the owner’s closet.

You see, in the hallway of the apartment, there is a small walk-in closet that we keep locked. No matter how much they pay, they can’t go in there. They can have everything else…but not that. No, nada, period.  Why?  Well…there are a couple of reasons but the main one is that it is filled with owner stuff.  It’s the storage closet where extra linens, cleaning supplies, mops, cleaning rags, decorations, things we don’t need and well, just things. If the guests were to see it, they definitely wouldn’t be impressed.  They might even say, “How can the rest of the place look so beautiful, and this look so…boring?”  And they would be right and that is why it is locked.

Every short-term rental that I have stayed in has an owner’s closet and I am sure none of them look as nice as the rental itself.  It’s just the nature of the beast.  But what about this?  What about our lives?  Do you have an owner’s closet in your life that no one, I mean no one, is welcome to open…to enter?  Your spouse? Nope. Your children? Nope. Your friends? Nope. Your parents? Nope.  God? Not even God.  Maybe especially not God. While the truth is all of us have that secret place, we need to know it can be a dangerous thing. When we are tempted to hide things, well, let’s just say bad things can grow in the dark.

Perhaps it is time we have the courage to unlock the door and let a little light in.  I know it can be difficult but as long as the door is locked, we won’t, we can’t change what’s inside. The best place to start is to invite God in.  If you are one of His kids, or especially if you aren’t, He won’t be surprised because He already knows everything.  In Psalm 139:23-24, a Book in the Jewish and Christian Bible, it says, “Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends You and lead me along the path of everlasting life.”

Now that is just some great advice. Remember this…if bad things grow in the dark…bad things die in the light. If we will just have the courage to unlock the door, open the door, and even flip on the light switch…well, healing can begin, and help will be on the way.  Why not take that giant step today?  As you reach out with the key and slip it into the lock and turn the knob on the door, just know this.  He is there with you, and He will help you all the way.  He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, forgiveness, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, loving others, prayer, Scripture, thankful

Thermostats

Adopt the same attitude as that of Christ Jesus.” Philippians 2:5

It just looked hot.  The other day I was lying on the couch in my living room. It is one of those nice long couches with plenty of room.  Even though I am not extremely tall, you might say, “height challenged,” it’s nice to know there is room to spare.  Our couch sits in front of a bay window, so I had a nice view of the trees outside and the clear blue summer sky.  It was good. I knew from a thermometer that registers the outside temperature that it was hot outside…really hot.  And, as I was lying there, I was just thinking how grateful I was for the guy who invented air conditioners.  Air conditioning is one of those things we take for granted and having been raised down south with only a window fan…well, let’s just say I’m grateful.

We are blessed at our house to have central air conditioning.  I have this thingy on the wall called a thermostat and it talks to my air conditioning…they are good friends and speak their own special language.  So, I tell the thermostat what temperature I like, and it tells the air conditioning. When it is needed, the thermostat prods the air conditioning and says, “Hey, we need some cool air” and just like that he fires up (no pun intended) and cools the room down.  It is a great relationship. Both are needed and I am grateful for both.

Now the thermometer and the thermostat are not the same thing.  You see the thermometer simply tells me the temperature, but it can’t do anything about it.  I could tell the thermometer, “Hey, I’m hot,” but all it can do is confirm the truth.  The thermostat on the other hand, has the ability to do something about it…and it does.  One instrument tells the condition of the room but the other has the ability to control the condition of the room.  How about that?

So, have you ever wondered if you are a thermometer or a thermostat?  Well, probably not, but the truth is all of us at one time or another is one or the other.  We find ourselves in a room of people and soon there is a discussion that goes south, and the temperature starts to rise.  If we are thermometers all we do is reflect the temperature and watch it rise. But if we are thermostats, we can help control the temperature with wise words and kind actions and maybe just maybe keep friends, friends.

Jesus was a great thermostat.  The four Books that talk about Him (Matthew, Mark, Luke and John) are filled with great examples. One time some rock chucking religious people wanted to stone a woman because she had sinned.  They asked Jesus what He thought and He told them OK but the person without sin had to cast the first rock.  Boy, that cooled things off.  One by one the rock chucker’s stepped away till it was only He and the woman left. He told her he wasn’t going to condemn her and invited her to go and sin no more.  Amazing.

Today, especially in these days, we need to be thermostats.  Every day there are situations that need a good thermostat and we Jesus’ people need to rise to the occasion.  Always be ready to set your thermostat to grace and then spread it around. Anybody can start a fire, or a fight or raise the temperature in a situation.  Anyone can reflect the temperature, but we are called to do more.  We are called to be like Jesus.

Paul, one of the guys who wrote the New Testament, said, “Adopt the same attitude as that of Christ Jesus.”  And what would that be?  It was His willingness to always go last instead of first. It was His willingness to forgive and not condemn.  It was His willingness to love the loveless, touch the untouchable, and care for the most unlikely.  It was being a thermostat.  I know that’s not always easy. It’s easier to tell a thermostat what to do than be one!  But don’t worry, God is ready and willing to help.  He loves it when His kids act like His Son.  No doubt…He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, loving others, Scripture, thankful

Learning to Speak Love

Remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how He Himself said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’” Acts 20:35b

It was, well, amazing.  I like to receive presents.  I love to receive presents.  Some guy wrote a book about the five love languages and basically, he said that everyone has at least one love language.  If you want to “ring someone’s bell” or “top off their love tank”, you do it by speaking their love language.  Well, my two primary love languages are gifts and words of affirmation.  Every time one of you leaves a kind comment about Grits, the nozzle goes in my love tank and fills it up.  How about that?

Well, my other love language is this gift thing.  When someone gives me something, it just rings my bell.  Several years ago, a friend visited Gettysburg and brought me back a set of coasters.  It was totally unexpected, and it just rang my bell.  He probably thought, “What’s the deal, dude?  It is only a set of coasters.” But no, it was more.  It said, “I thought of you.”  And, several years later it still brings a smile to my face.  We have a couple of good friends that like to travel, and they often bring me a souvenir of their travels and it is always blesses me. Boom—a full love tank.

Well, something happened last year that was pretty awesome.  We have a family who is part of our church family, and they are just a special group of people.  It is hard to put a finger on it but words like authentic and caring come to mind.  Well, after church one day, the mom in this family came up to me and was just beaming—and I mean beaming with joy and excitement. Her entire countenance said, “Something good had happened.”  I wasn’t sure what it was, but I couldn’t wait to hear what it was.  I was in for a surprise.

Here is what tumbled out of her mouth.  “We bought you something and I couldn’t wait to tell you.  I know I was supposed to wait but I just couldn’t.  I saw this on Facebook and said, “We have to buy this for Bro. Dewayne.”  She bubbled and bubbled, and I was in awe.  The gift was the “Fingerprint” of God.  It was a print in the shape of a fingerprint and the fingerprint was made from a scripture from each book in the Bible.  It sounded amazing and when it came in and they gave it to me, it was.  It will soon have a home in my church office, and it will have a story…this story.

You see, the gift really was amazing, but the unseen gift was equally so.  What was the unseen gift?  It was their—her—unbridled, unlimited joy and enthusiasm in not “getting” a gift but “giving” one.  Her joy in giving this special print to me, her friend, and her pastor, touched me and taught me.  It touched me that this special family made a sacrifice and bought me this gift.  It taught me that just like Jesus said, “It is more blessed to give than to receive.”  I have heard that verse for many, many years and have seen it on display at different levels.  But this time…this act of love taught me what it really means.

I have to wonder if this is what it is like when a person comes to follow Jesus for the first time.  I mean the Bible says God throws a party. The Bible says that all heaven breaks loose when someone comes home.  I can just imagine the smile on Jesus’ face when a person He loves and died for finally gets it and trusts Him.  I bet it looks at least something like the face of this family and especially my friend who shared the news with me, “We bought you something.”  We want to..wait for it…not get but give.  Amazing.

Though I love to travel and try and go to Africa once a year, I have always struggled with learning a new language.  But I wonder if that might need to change?  Maybe today, maybe this week, maybe I, maybe you, need to learn a new language.  No, I’m not talking Swahili—I’m talking about someone’s love language.  Someone in your world, your spouse, your kids, your neighbor ,or maybe someone else.  Learn what tops their love tank and do it.

The guy who wrote the book says the love languages are gifts, words of affirmation, acts of service, physical touch, and quality time. Why not learn and practice someone’s love language today?  If you are like me and struggle with learning (I can barely speak English), just ask the Father for a little help.  He will be more than glad to help you.  He loves it when His kids can speak love.  Yup…He’s got that too.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, fear, Grace, gratitude, life, love, loving others, Military memories, prayer, priorities, Scripture, Southern born, sovereignty of God, thankful, Trials

Daddy’s Heart Attack

We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God, who are called according to His purpose.” Romans 8:28

Thanks, Dad…for the heart attack. It was back in 1976, June 26th to be specific, that I married Judy Allen.  She was a Georgia peach that was quite the catch.  I met her when I walked into a strange, new church on a Wednesday night. I entered the side door and boom—there she was.  Standing in a circle of ordinary young ladies, this young lady was anything but.  Then, there was a phone call, a date and well, here we are forty-six years…she is still quite the catch, we are still in love, and we are still grateful for a God who has a plan.

I was talking with Judy the other day and said, “What if we had never met?” I honestly cannot fathom my life without her…but what if?  It was really a strange set of circumstances that got us together.  I was in the Air Force and my Daddy had a pretty major heart attack while I was home on leave.  It sure changed our Christmas plans, but it also changed my life.  My Momma, and don’t ask me how since this was way before the internet and smart phones, found out through the Red Cross that the Air Force would sometimes grant a “humanitarian reassignment” to airmen to the base nearest their home.  The conditions were strict, and the odds were long, but we (Momma and I) decided we should give it a shot.

It required all kinds of statements from the doctors and a bunch of other stuff that I don’t even remember.  At the time I was stationed at Minot AFB in North Dakota and trust me that is a long way from home.  Anyway, we applied and then one day I received a call from Base Personnel letting me know that my request had been approved and I was being reassigned to Moody AFB in Valdosta, Georgia. Soon, it was so long Minot and hello Moody.  I arrived at my new base in April of 1973.  I would drive home every weekend (about two hours) to see family and friends and come back Sunday evening.

Gratefully, God allowed my Daddy to live till midsummer of the next year when He decided heaven was better than here.  Of course, his leaving changed everything. I think my Momma went to stay with one of my brothers or sisters for a while and suddenly there wasn’t as much reason to go home.  I was a regular church goer, but it really wasn’t my desire to go to church that Wednesday night as much as it was…boredom.  Valdosta wasn’t a big town and Moody wasn’t a big airbase, so I just needed something to do.  And, as they say, the rest is history.

Which leads to my opening line…Daddy’s heart attack.  If it hadn’t had been for that and my Momma’s persistence, well, I would have stayed in Minot and probably froze to death. Smile. I would have never met Judy, there would not have been our three precious daughters and hence no eight grandchildren.  And, honestly, I probably wouldn’t be pastoring and wouldn’t be writing this today.  But God is a God of infinite details and design.  He tells us in the Bible that every day of our lives is planned before a single one of them is lived.  I like that…a lot.

He also teaches us that for those who love Him and are called by Him, He can take anything and everything and bring good out of it.  No, not everything is good…not even close and that isn’t what He said.  He said He can bring good and in the case of my Daddy’s heart attack, my life path is part of that good.  Have you ever thought of life that way?  Can you think of a situation where God did that for you?  I bet you can. You see, God is good, God is faithful, and God can be trusted.

One day I will see my Daddy again…in heaven.  I’ll probably chat with him and ask if he ever thought about the good that God brought about because of his heart attack.  And then, well, I’ll tell him all about Judy (if she isn’t there yet) and his great grandkids.  It’s gonna be a great reunion.  Till then, I hope I remember to trust my heavenly Dearest Daddy each day, and know that no matter what, no matter how big…He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, Scripture, thankful, Trials

Walking Together

Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their efforts. For if either falls, his companion can lift him up; but pity the one who falls without another to lift him up.” Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

“Love Will Keep Us Together.”  It is one of our songs from the 70’s and it has been a way of living for us.  We sleep in the same bedroom in the same bed.  We eat our meals together.  We go out and eat together.  We watch television…mostly together.  We travel together…doing vacations…together.  We are a together kind of couple.  The old saying goes, “the family that prays together, stays together” and I do believe there is truth in that statement. A nationally known speaker said that 80 percent of couples who pray together stay together.  Interesting…if nothing else.

Well, this week my wife Judy and I carried this together thing to a new level.  Tuesday of this week, after a week of being ill with traveler’s disease (there’s a Grits story on that), I began feeling a little puny.  As the day went on, I felt worse.  Of all days, it was Judy’s birthday, and she had a lunch party with several of her friends so we didn’t see each other till after I got home from work.  So, I walked in, and she was sitting at her desk. I think I spoke first and said I just wasn’t feeling good, and she responded with, “I don’t feel good either.”  We decided to postpone our birthday dinner plans and sat around each progressively feeling worse.

Being a COVID veteran, I had my suspicions but didn’t say much but the night and the next morning said it all.  We both tossed and turned, got hot and then cold, had headaches (her’s was mega) and body aches. I got up first and felt just miserable and then Judy came in.  Now Judy is one of those folks who rarely gets sick and rarely complains.  She came into my office and simply said, “I feel terrible. We need to go the doctor.”  Well, she took a home COVID test and it was a clear positive.  The long and short of it all, we both had COVID, and it was one more thing we did together.

I told her I was grateful she was sick with me.  Let me explain. First, because I didn’t have to walk this alone and, second, I knew she could identify with how I felt.  Her body hurt like mine.  When I had COVID over year ago she was sympathetic but this time she empathic.  What is the difference?  Think of it this way.  If a person on the shore sees a person struggling in water and throws them a life preserver…they are sympathetic. But when that same person jumps into the water and struggles with that person…they are empathetic.

Over the last forty-six years of marriage (we celebrate that on June 26th) we have had plenty to celebrate but it occurred to me that we sometimes miss reasons to “tip our glass.”  This might be one of those.  We walked the COVID valley together, caring for one another, helping one another.  We walked the dark road each shining light on the other’s path.  That is love and frankly, that is a little Jesus too. It probably is a great example of Proverbs 4:9-10, “Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their efforts. 10. For if either falls, his companion can lift him up; but pity the one who falls without another to lift him up.” It’s true in life, it’s true in marriage and it is true in COVID.

So, there you go.  It is wonderful to have a wife and a friend like Judy to walk with me, but did you know there is something even better?  You see my Dearest Daddy in heaven walks with me too.  Honestly, I felt so bad I couldn’t even think about praying but that is ok because the Bible teaches that the God’s Holy Spirit was praying on my behalf.  And, the Bible also says that Jesus is constantly interceding for us too.  Talk about a prayer team.  That might be why I just know that if I listened, I would hear the sweet whisperer whispering, “Don’t worry, son, We’ve got this!” Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, Grace, gratitude, life, loving others, Scripture, thankful, Trials

Songbird Stubbornness

Don’t be misled—you cannot mock the justice of God. You will always harvest what you plant.” Galatians 6:7

Some people…some things are just slow learners.  A couple of weeks ago, my wife Judy was “grand-dog” sitting for our daughter Jennifer and tribe.  It was a great opportunity to sit back and relax and have some space.  She read, she walked, and she just did Judy stuff. I was back home going to work so it is possible there was just a little jealousy on my part.  It just sounded like she was just having more fun than I was.

Where the tribe lives there is plenty of country and plenty of wildlife.  Deer are frequent visitors to the backyard with an occasional skunk, raccoon, and possum.  Oh and every once in a while, Bigfoot stops by for short visit.  There was one rather intriguing friend who showed up every day and did the craziest thing.  You see, there was this beautiful bluebird that would spend a large portion of the morning and a chunk of the evening sitting the patio.  There was food there, water was also available, so it was a good gig.  But that wasn’t the crazy thing…this was.

This bluebird would fly into the glass of the bedroom window by the feeder. It wasn’t a mistake, it wasn’t bad navigation…it was intentional. He would take off, fly straight into the window, bounce off and then return to his perch.  He would then do it over and over again.  Fortunately, and apparently, he didn’t have time to build up a lot of speed so there was no damage to the window and little to him…though he certainly had to have a splitting headache.  And the truth is if you were to go to their house this morning that little bird would be doing the same thing today.

This obviously caused Judy and I to try and figure this all out and I think we finally did.  You see, the window has a film on it that can make the window somewhat like a mirror.  The best we can tell, in the reflection caused by the window, he saw what he thought was another male bluebird and that was just not going to cut it.  So, he decided to do something about it and flew over to “take care of business.”  How about that?

There are two lessons in this little story and if we learn them, we should all be grateful to the little bluebird.  First, don’t think that everyone or, in his case, everything is your enemy.  It’s too bad that our friend didn’t think to have the bird in the mirror over for lunch.  He would have quickly learned that what he thought was an enemy…was himself.  It has been said, and it certainly is true, that sometimes we are our own worst enemies. And, hey, when the enemy is a reality, go ahead and extend just a little grace. After all, you catch more flies with sugar than salt.

The second lesson is more personal and personally profitable.  Our friend never seemed to figure out that the bird in the window wasn’t real.  Over and over again, he banged into the window appearing not too smart and getting a whale of a headache in return.  You see, it just doesn’t make sense to keep doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.  Paul, one of the heavy weights who wrote a lot of the New Testament said, “God won’t be mocked.  Whatever a person sows, he will also reap.”  Paul was right.  If you want a different result…you must do something different.  God advice…good advice.

So, this week as you journey, if you find yourself tempted to fly into a window or a wall, hit the pause button.  Ask yourself if the collision is going to be worth it.  Ask yourself if this headache is worth a bigger one!  Oh, and just in case you find yourself doing something over and over again with the exact same result…maybe, just maybe, you should try sometime different. After all, if you want something besides corn, you gotta sow some different seed.  And if all else fails, well, you can always ask the Dearest Daddy of heaven for some advice.  I think you will find His way is always best.  You know, “He’s always got this.”  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, fear, food, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, loving others, prayer, Scripture, sovereignty of God, thankful, travel, Trials

An Angel from Bowling Green

The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord…and He delights in His way.” Psalm 37:23

Did you know that some angels come from Bowling Green, Kentucky?  Well, my wife Judy and I recently returned from vacation.  Now, I really like vacations.  We are blessed that God has provided the means for us to go and our church (I’m a pastor) provided the time.  And believe me…it was time.  We saved, planned, and decided a return trip to Punta Cana sounded like just the thing we needed.  We bought tickets, made the reservations, and like the old Willie Nelson song says, we were back on the road again. And…we were excited!

We decided to stay at a place where we had stayed several times before.  We figured with Covid and all of that it might be better to go to a place we were familiar with.  We had a great flight down and soon we are were in paradise….well, sorta.  Truthfully, it was somewhat apparent that Covid had taken the wind out of the sails of our familiar place. It just wasn’t the same.  But, like we always say…at least we were away. The Dominican is a great place, but you still must be careful…stay at the resort, eat at the resort and above all…don’t drink the water. Most of the time Judy and I are good rule keepers…and we were this time, too.

Then came Wednesday.  That day I could tell my appetite was a bit off, but it was no deal. At supper that night I ate very little and as we walked back to the room, I told Judy I just felt a bit sad.  Well, in a few minutes, I found out I wasn’t sad…I was sick.  In spite of all my precautions, I apparently had the dreaded “traveler’s disease.”  If you don’t know what it is…I’ll let you look it up, but it is enough to say it ain’t fun. Period.  Well for the next two days I pretty much stayed in the room and by Saturday, going home day, I wasn’t much better.  We boarded the bus for the airport and things went from bad to worse.

As we sat there, my stomach got more and more queasy, and I was pretty certain I was going to quickly be the most unpopular guy on the bus.  Meanwhile as I doing my best to “keep my cookies,” Judy was having a great conversation with the mother of a family sitting by us.  She was talking to them, and I was talking to myself, “Don’t lose it, don’t lose it.”  Soon we arrived at the airport, thankfully with stomach intact, and got into a very long line to check our luggage for the flight.  I tried but I just couldn’t stand there so I told Judy I was going to the restroom and try and sit-down.  She kindly handled the luggage and both backpacks and I went and collapsed.

I watched from a distance.  I was praying, “God, I sure need Your help, but I know I need to trust you…so Your will be done.” While I was praying there, Judy was praying in line. Soon, but not soon enough, Judy was almost at the counter and waved for me to come on over.  I did and when I got there, the friendly family “just happened to be” in front of her.  I was standing there, more miserable than ever, and the mother’s mother, mouthed the words, “Are you ok?” I simply said I was not, telling her my stomach was very upset.  And then…it happened. The mother said, “I have some Pepto Bismol in my luggage, would you like some”?  I responded with a very grateful “yes”.

So right there, though she was next in line, she laid her luggage (which was the size of Texas) on the floor, opened it up, dug around (she packed like Judy…smile) and quickly produced a small bottle of Pepto.  I quickly opened it up and took a swig.  Borne on the wings of prayer, within a few minutes, and I do mean a few minutes, I was much better.  No, I wasn’t normal, but I knew I wouldn’t be losing my cookies.  A dose or two later and I was much, much better. I was going to survive.  And all of that…because a caring Dearest Daddy heard the prayers of His kids.

Some would be tempted to say it was happenstance, some would say it was just a nice person being nice, but for those of us who know God, we know differently.  It makes me go back to that great verse in the Old Testament part of the Bible, “The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord, and He delights in His way.”  You see this whole thing was all about God and not about me.  He took care of me…and it delighted Him to do so.  I love that.  So, while the vacation didn’t make the top ten…God did.  In fact, He is number one and the only One.  It just proves what we have learned together…He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne