Posted in Family, fear, friends, gratitude, life, love, prayer, Scripture, sovereignty of God, thankful

A Change in Plans

 “And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.” Romans 8:28

In a moment…everything changed. A long time ago, one of the young ladies in our church family asked me if, when the time came, I would perform her marriage ceremony. Her mom told me she had long dreamed of her wedding and part of that dream was for me to conduct the ceremony. Well, when I retired last year from the pastorate, she immediately came up and reminded me that retirement or not, I still had to be there for her on her special day. Well, not long after, sure enough, she was engaged and I was invited to be a part of the ceremony. The days, weeks and months until the day came and went and finally it was time.

She is one of those well organized people and she had planned everything down to the smallest detail. She found a beautiful wedding venue overlooking a lake. It was going to be a beautiful outdoor wedding and the weather for the wedding day was going to be perfect.  However, the evening of the rehearsal was another tale indeed. When the rehearsal time came it was raining those big, heavy drops but soon it passed and the sun at least made a cursory appearance. Rain or not, we were having a grand time. I’ve known this family a long time and was enjoying the time of fellowship and celebration.  

Soon, the rehearsal was over and we left to drive into the nearby town of Marion for the rehearsal dinner. Can someone say yay? As I was walking to my car to drive to the restaurant I noticed a very large and ominous cloud heading our way. We all got into our vehicles and drove the short distance for dinner. Just as we were nearing the restaurant, the tornado sirens started blaring and the tornado emergency signal sounded on my phone. It was ominous indeed. Arriving at the restaurant, we headed inside trying to ignore the increasing rain and blaring sirens. 

Soon we were seated at the dinner table feeling at least somewhat secure in the sturdy building. Well, as it turned out, we were safe but there was indeed a tornado and it struck the venue site head-on, completely destroying the main building along with everything that had been setup for the wedding. It had all the makings of a disaster. Just about then it was pretty hard to see the handiwork of God. After the initial shock the family began trying to piece the celebration scheduled for the next day back together. As it turned out there were several “blessings.” 

First, we were all safe. Had our departure been delayed by eight or ten minutes, we would have been right in the middle of the destruction but our Dearest Daddy made sure we were not there. Thank you Father. Second, one of the essential parts of the ceremony, the wedding dress, was in a small building very close to the larger one that was destroyed. The little building and the wedding dress survived. Thank you Father. Last, on this short list of blessings, as the family scrambled to find a new location, a new venue, which just happened (smile) to be available, was located not too far from the original site–and with no damage. Thank you Father.

Despite all the difficulties, I believe most of the wedding party soon began to see how our Dearest Daddy was working even when it was hard to see. And that is just what He does–always working. I am writing this the morning of the wedding ceremony. I’ve got some editing to do to the ceremony because this is a story that needs to be told and certainly won’t be forgotten. It reminds me that no matter what it looks like, God really is good…we just need to be sure to look and see it…and find it.  This is a wonderful example of how God causes everything to work for our good and His glory. It is also a wonderful example of how, no matter what, “He’s got this.”  Bro. Dewayne 

Posted in Family, gratitude, love, loving others, Mother's Day, Scripture, thankful

Remembering Momma

 “Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also praises her: Many women have done noble deeds, but you surpass them all!” Proverbs 31:28-29

Each year I observe Mother’s Day with Grits by publishing this story.  Why? Well, it pretty much says it all.  Mother’s Day is a day to celebrate our mothers, our wives and other ladies who have poured their life into our lives. But the problem is time can make that harder.  Let me explain. You see, time can be a bane and a blessing. It is difficult to live with but we sure can’t live without it and as we get older, it can begin to fuzz the brain and our memories. Things that at one time were vivid and clear become a midst and sometimes disappear into the fog.

That seems to be true of so many of my childhood memories—my Momma memories. Things that I am sure were so valuable, so definitive at the time, are now simply not there. I am sure that is the case with my memories of my parents as a child. When that happens, I simply fill in the gaps with hints and clues from the things I do remember. As the pieces come together, it quickly becomes obvious that my Momma was one of my anchors and a huge blessing in my life.

As I scan the landscape of my childhood, as I piece the pieces together, I realize that I had a really good childhood, and it was largely because of my parents and in particular, my mother. One of my daughters wrote to my wife Judy, “Daddy may be the head of the house but you are the one who makes it a home.” Amen. Well, anyway, as the baby of eight, by the time they got to me, two things were obvious: they had it down to a science, and I was pretty spoiled. 

Because of our finances, we didn’t get everything we wanted (not by a long shot), but Christmas, birthdays, and usually even ordinary days were special. Momma was often the one who made that happen. She was a stay-at-home, hold the fort down, mom and was always there when I needed her. Perhaps you have heard of a Swiss Army knife.  It is one crazy invention where a simple pocketknife becomes an all-purpose, whatever you need tool. And that describes Momma. Whatever the occasion she was there for us…for me. Well, truth be known, while she didn’t wear a habit like Mother Teresa or a nurse’s uniform like Florence Nightingale or banish a sword like Joan of Arc, she was that and more in my eyes. 

I wonder how many times was I sick, and she became Doctor Momma?  On so many occasions I can remember her pulling me into her lap and holding me. On one particular occasion when I was over five and under ten, I was very sick— fever, nausea, and a young body that felt like it had been beaten.  I know now it was probably the flu and probably contagious and yet there she was in our old rocking chair, at two in the morning, cradling me and holding me.  That was Momma.

Sometimes Momma put on her Leonardo da Vinci hat and showed a designer flare. I can remember as a teenager I had a rather new pair of jeans—ordinary to some—valuable to me. I was horseback riding one day, and the horse cut a corner too sharply and ran me into a pole, ripping my jeans right above the knee. Bummer. My Momma simply cut the legs off the jeans where they were torn, put in some bright red cloth, and sewed them back together. There you go…good as new, and since it was the 70’s, it made a statement. I had a one-of-a-kind pair of jeans.

Two or three times a day Momma always put on her chef’s hat. A couple of years ago I made a thoughtless and inaccurate comment about Momma’s cooking not being “the best in the world.” Can someone say, “Dumb?”  Can someone say, “Really?” No, Momma was a great cook and my waistline still proves it.  She had the amazing ability to take the ordinary and make it extraordinary. To me, her chicken and dumplings and blackberry dumplings were both legendary.  Oh, and did I mention her fried corn beef hash?  No, Chef Momma was amazing…and we loved her for it.

Yup, my Momma was amazing and the longer I live the more I realize just how blessed I was to have her.  It has been said that men often marry women like their mothers.  Well, that at least helps to explain the amazing wife that God has given me.  In so many ways she too is that wife, that mother, that grandmother that so many wish they had.  I don’t have to wish…Judy is my wish come true. Someone once said that a person who has one good friend in their life is blessed.  Well, without going any further than my home I know I have had two—Momma and my precious wife Judy.  Thank You, Lord…a bunch.

Remember, there is no such thing as a perfect Momma but a lot of us have been blessed with great ones. On this Mother’s Day, if Momma is still around, be sure and let her know how much you appreciate her.  And if she isn’t…well, be sure and thank the Lord.  And one more thought…be sure and thank your wife, for all she has done. Guys, trust me, we would be lost without them.  Oh, and do remember this, there is a God who loves you more than your Momma ever could or did.  It’s good to know that no matter what…He’s got this. Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Easter, friends, Grace, gratitude, love, Scripture, spring, thankful

One Ugly Cross

 “For the word of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but it is the power of God to us who are being saved.” 1 Corinthians 1:18

Good Friday and Easter are right around the corner and I want to share something that happens every year at our church. It is the story of a cross.  I know all Christian churches have crosses, in fact, we have several.  But each Easter there is a special cross that sits at the entrance of our church.  And it has a story to tell.

A while back our church had two services on Sunday morning—one early and one later.  When people came to our early service on Easter morning, they were greeted by what can only be described as one ugly cross.  It is made of weathered 2×4’s and covered with…chicken wire.  I am sure more than one person sees that cross and wonders how the custodian could forget to store it before services started. What they wouldn’t know is something is going to happen to that old rugged cross…something that will make it beautiful.

Long ago, there was another old rugged cross and it too was ugly.  It was “repurposed” as criminal after criminal was hung from it.  Nails were driven through human flesh and blood was spilt.  Rome didn’t take kindly to those who rebelled against their stern and unfair system of “justice.”  Like the cross in our foyer, it didn’t need to be displayed…it needed to be hidden.  Then, one day, something different happened. Something different indeed.

So, what about the ugly cross at our church?  Well, you see during the time in-between our two services a wonderful transformation would take place.  The ladies would take dozens of beautiful flowers and completely cover the cross and piece by piece, bloom by bloom, that ugly old cross became beautiful.  And two thousand years ago, the same thing happened.

I know, the thought of Jesus, the Rose of Sharon, the perfect Lamb of God, nailed to a Roman cross, well, is anything but beautiful…until we remember.  We remember that He was no held by nails of iron but by love.  We remember that He was there not for His own sin but for ours.  He was there so that we could call His Father our Father and suddenly His old, rugged cross takes on a new beauty.  It is a beautiful picture of love, sacrifice, and redemption.

Perhaps that is what led the hymn writer to write, “On a hill far away stood an old rugged cross—the emblem of suffering and shame. And I love that old cross where the dearest and best for a world of lost sinners was slain.” Perhaps the author was able to see past the blood and gore to a Savior’s blessed glory. Perhaps he saw what we should see…what we need to see. Paul saw it…that is why he wrote, “For the word of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but it is the power of God to us who are being saved.” No doubt.

Well, at the end of our second service, people would stop and pose by the now beautiful cross and its beautiful blooms.  Its beauty reminds us that instead of an instrument of death, it was an instrument of redemption.  Its beauty shouts that He is no longer hanging on a cross, He is no longer tucked away in a borrowed tomb, no, He is alive…He lives.  Hallelujah…what a Savior…what a Redeemer…what a Rescuer.

Each year on the Monday after Easter, our cross was stripped of its now dying flowers and it was stored away to be rediscovered next year.  But let’s make a point to never forget what the old, rugged cross is all about…redemption, rescue and love.  Let’s gather each week, whether it is Sunday or another day, and celebrate an old rugged cross and an empty tomb.  Because they are both empty, we have a reason to celebrate.  Need a little help with that? Don’t worry…He’s got that.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Easter, Family, gratitude, life, love, Scripture, thankful

The Easter Suit

 “But God demonstrated His love for us in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:8

It’s just another one of those special memories.  It was spring in Jacksonville, Florida and number fifteen or so in my life journey.  Back in those days, Easter was a big deal, and so was what you wore.  We were raised in the tradition that Easter meant a new outfit…it is just what we did.  But just like Christmas beliefs and traditions sometimes change…so did this Easter tradition.  As we got older…the new outfits got fewer but then, for some reason, it happened.  One year, when I was about fifteen, Momma and Daddy loaded me up in the car, drove across town to a men’s store for the sole purpose of buying me an Easter suit.

I’m not sure what prompted this or a hundred other sacrifices they made for us but it happened.  The name of the store is lost to time but it may have been Tatum’s—a store known for quality men’s clothing at a good price.  So we arrived and went in and soon I was trying on suits.  They say some things never change and that is true.  Today when I shop for just about anything it isn’t the label that matters or even the style—price takes the day.  It is a matter of practically and budget.  It is true today because it was true then.  Remember, somethings don’t change.

Soon, with the help of our salesperson, we had settled on a subtle green tweed suit.  It was a very nice suit and the price was very reasonable.  I would later realize that might have been because it was a rather heavy wool material and there wasn’t a lot of demand for it in Florida.  Regardless, it was soon mine.  But Momma and Daddy weren’t done.  The salesman led us over to the shirt department and we picked out a creamy yellow shirt that matched the suit perfectly.  But wait…there was more.  Next came a tie.  To this day I can remember this—my first tie—bought just for me.  It was a linen, striped tie made of pastel colors.  Again, a perfect match for the new suit and tie.

There was some tailoring to the done but by Easter morning I was set and dressed to the nines.  That morning, I assembled my new outfit and proudly headed off to church.  I was so proud but for a special reason…one you have read before in Grits.  I was proud because of all my parents had done to make sure I had a new Easter suit. Why that year? I don’t know.  Maybe it was because I was stepping into manhood.  That year, and most years that followed, the subtle green wool suit was too warm to wear but that never stopped me from wearing it.  It was special and that was all that mattered. It was a suit of love…a suit of sacrifice.

Looking back their Easter sacrifice is made even more special. You see, that gift and sacrifice was at least a little like the gift and sacrifice that God made for us that first Easter.  He gave His best, His only Son to a Roman cross so we could be forgiven and dressed in His righteousness.  And unlike my suit that was a little too warm for Florida…His gift was perfect…in more ways than one. A perfect sacrifice for an imperfect world filled with imperfect people. And why? Because of love.

Easter, Resurrection Sunday, is just around the corner but it would serve us well to remember that every time the sun rises, it reminds us of the resurrection.  It is no accident that Christians worship on Sunday…by design it is a celebration of the resurrection. I’m not sure how long I held onto that subtle green, too warm, suit but I have never forgotten the love that bought it for me.  And, I’m sure I will never forget the love of a God who cared enough to give His very best so that we could call Him “Dearest Daddy.” 

Paul, one of the writers of the New Testament wrote a letter to the Christians in Rome.  In it, he gave them an Easter suit of sorts, a reminder of God’s great love.  He wrote, “But God demonstrated His love for us in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.”  Imagine that—broken and unworthy—and yet He loved and He gave.  Today and each day, don’t leave the message of Easter behind.  He loves us, He cares for us, and He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, gratitude, life, love, prayer, Scripture, sovereignty of God, thankful, travel

A Dream and A Prayer

 “But, as it is written, “What no eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor the heart of man imagined, what God has prepared for those who love him.” 1 Corinthians 2:9

We had to have the wrong address. Judy and I came home from our Air Force assignment in Germany in 1977. After visiting family for a couple of weeks, we headed to our new duty assignment. We were assigned to Whiteman Air Force Base near Knob Noster, Missouri.  Yes, friend, there is a Knob Noster.  We arrived there only to find out that the state fair was being held about twenty miles away.  There were no hotel rooms. Nada. None. Period.

Knob Noster only had a couple of small hotels, and both had said they were full.  Judy was expecting and I was starting to feel like the Bible story of Mary and Joseph.  You know, the whole no room deal.  Well, the one place said try back that afternoon and maybe someone will check out.  They did and we had a room.

First, you need to understand this was back in 1980 so there was no internet to check ratings and all of that.  Second, it was the only room in town.  Third, it was bad—as in not good.  Bad as in bugs.  Bad as in bad.  Oh, well, it wasn’t a stable so we were grateful.  It was a place to sleep.  God was good. Probably though, I needed to be more specific next time when I ask for a place to stay. I needed to learn from Judy.

So, the very next day we start looking for a place to live.  There was a town called Warrensburg about ten miles from the base.  It had a university and was a nice, yet small, midwestern town.  Unfortunately, housing options were very limited.  The few places the real estate person showed us were small, dated, and pricey.  Now Judy had this prayer thing down.  She had asked God for a house with a fireplace.  My expectations weren’t that high. I had asked God for a house without bugs.  She was much more creative than me.  Honestly, I wasn’t sure God was going to pull off either one of our requests.  And then he came along.

No, it wasn’t God, but he was God’s delivery man.  His name was Mario—like the brothers. He kinda looked like Danny DeVito. He too was a real estate agent and he had heard us talking with the other agent.  He came over and introduced himself. He said, “You know, I have a house that I had built but haven’t been able to sell.  I might be willing to rent it to you.”  He gave us the address and told us go and check it out. It was just outside of town in a neighborhood called, “Valley View.”

We drove out and turned in and started checking addresses.  At the end of the first road, we had to go left or right on Valley View Circle.  We went left and began looking for house number 209.  Soon, on the right, was number 209.  But wait…this couldn’t be the right place.  It was a new, beautiful three-bedroom split level brick home.  We were shocked and said, “No, this can’t be right.”  We went and peeked in the windows.  “No, no way. Must have the wrong address.” And then we saw it.  A massive chimney connected to a big fireplace.

Well, this was too much. Judy and I were beyond excited. This was more, so much more, than we ever expected in our wildest expectations.  We immediately went back to the real estate office and hunted down Mario.  “Well,” he said, “I’ve changed my mind.  Sorry, no deal.”  Naw…just kidding.  He said he liked us, trusted us and would be willing to work with us.  The bottom line is he rented it to us at below market value.  He said he would need a security deposit and we told him we didn’t have anything saved up.  He readily agreed to tack $25 a month onto the rent till we had that covered.  Oh, and of course, it was refundable.  

So, that is how Judy and I moved into our Cinderella castle at 209 Valley View Circle. Oh, and the yard needed landscaping, so he paid me to do that and took it off the rent. Amazing.  You have probably already guessed that this is one of our favorite God stories.  I still smile as I write this because it is just one example of how God has showered us with His love and grace.  A fireplace? Really? New brick home?  Yup. God is good.

Now God wasn’t good because He gave us a very nice house when there was no way we could afford one.  God wasn’t even good because He gave Judy a fireplace.  No, God is just good.  Sometimes it is very obvious and sometimes it takes a little faith to see it…but He is good.  Someone once said, “God is good, and He is good at being God.”  I was thankful for the Knob Noster Motel (bugs and all) because it was better than sleeping in our car.  But I was also thankful for the time He gave us our wildest dream.

1 Corinthians 2:9 says, “But, as it is written, “What no eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor the heart of man imagined, what God has prepared for those who love Him.” I know that is probably talking about heaven, but I think it has to apply here too. Over the years there have been some real winner mountaintops when God just showed off. But do you know what?  There have been some valleys too. Hard times when we couldn’t see the next step.  The big take away has always been, “God is good. God is faithful. God can be trusted.”  So, I’m gonna lay my head down tonight and rest in Him believing that.  After all, He’s got this.” Bro. Dewayne

Posted in friends, gratitude, life, love, Scripture, thankful, travel

The Captain and the Wind

 “Oh, Lord God! You Yourself made the heavens and earth by Your great power and with Your outstretched arm. Nothing is too difficult for You!” Jeremiah 32:17

 It was the gift of a lifetime. It was 1997 and we were experiencing the gift of a lifetime—the trip of a lifetime. The church where we pastored had honored us with a massive trip to the Holy Land in celebration of our tenth anniversary as their pastor.  I’ve shared some of those incredible times once or twice before in Grits. Recently though I was reminded of a part of the trip that was a small part of a big story and teaches a powerful lesson about us and God.

After a quick visit to Greece and a long visit to the Holy Land, we found ourselves in the land of Pharaohs.  How incredible to stand where the children of Israel once slaved and worked.  How amazing to stand where Moses stood as he spoke for the great, “I AM,” and spoke the words on behalf of God, “Let My people go.”  The pyramids, the great sphinx, the museums, the history all were breathtaking and then there was—the Nile.

Though my wife Judy and I have now seen and been on the Nile several times…back then it was the first time…and there’s nothing like the first time.  As part of our trip, we took a day trip on this ancient and mighty river.  There were all kinds of vessels on the river that day from small to very large, from very old to newer and from those powered by sails and those powered by massive engines.

Ours was powered by diesel.  As we prepared to leave the port, the captain of the vessel fired up the engines and soon we were underway.  With the powerful engine, the vessel went in the direction and speed that the captain desired.  It was impressive but there was something else there on the river that was equally so.  All around us were boats not powered by gas or diesel but by the wind.  Silently and gracefully, they cut through the water…not as fast as others but somehow more impressive…more desirable.

What was it that was so attractive?  It was the fact that they did not depend on their own power—they depended on a power outside of themselves—bigger than themselves.  They moved at a pace and the whim of the wind. Oh, there was a human hand on the rudder and there was skill in the positioning of the sail but still it was the wind that moved the boat. And, unlike our vessel, the captain and crew never had to worry about breaking down or running out of fuel.  And somehow, that just seemed better…richer.

I read a devotion by a guy named Aussie Dave (you have to love that name) that pointed out this vast difference.  And I learned that it wasn’t about boats at all…it was about us…and our lives…and how we choose to live our lives.  Oh, we can motor along through life, seemingly controlling our fate, our direction, our speed, and all that might work, will work, until the engine breaks down or we run out of fuel. And, trust me, there will be a time in life when both will happen and it is just about then we will realize the value of trusting something bigger, Someone bigger, with our journey. That, of course, is Creator God—the One who created it all—including the wind.

If I’m guessing right, a lot of us wrestle with letting the Creator of the wind propel our vessels…our lives.  We simply want to be in charge…to determine the direction and details of our trip but remember this.  Along the shores of Nile were abandoned vessels…broken down and wore down and long abandoned. And while there may have been a few sailing vessels along that same shore, they were always a candidate to be rebuilt—to be redeemed and that too is the story of those who trust in a Captain that made it all. With this Captain…nothing is impossible.

Judy and I will never forget that journey or the people who made it possible. It was a generous and sacrificial gift given from our friend’s hearts.  We will also never forget the generous and sacrificial gift of our Dearest Daddy who makes life, our lives, so rich and purposeful and our eternity so…well, sometimes there just aren’t words.  I hope you have chosen God as your Captain and I hope you will pause even now and listen.  Even when the wind goes still and your progress so slow, listen carefully as the Whisperer whispers, “I’ve got this.”  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in communication, Family, friends, gratitude, life, love, Scripture, thankful

Sharing Grits

 “Don’t neglect to do what is good and to share, for God is pleased with such sacrifices.” Hebrews 13:16

My Momma taught me to share.  When there are a bunch of kids and other family members in a family you learn two contradicting lessons.  First, you need to share.  Often, especially when it comes to the good things on a dinner table, the demand usually exceeds supply.  You know, nine people and eight pieces of pie.  So, you cut the pieces smaller.  That is sharing.  The other lesson is you need to act fast.  We all know the adage that the early bird gets the worm or the one who eats his or her pie the fastest gets a shot at the last piece.  That is not sharing.

Sharing and putting others first are Jesus things.  He was the only guy who could go to any event and be the star of the show.  Be it a wedding, a funeral, or a banquet and bam…He was the most important person in the room.  But the funny thing is you never see that.  You always see Him at the back of the line.  The only time He was first in line was the line for the cross.  That was a very short line—in fact, it was only one deep, and He was ready and willing to go because He loved us so much.

He was willing to share His righteousness too.  We didn’t have any of our own, so He gave us His.  The Bible says that our righteousness was like filthy rags, so He shared, in fact, He gave.  It’s pretty amazing.  There are some things we shouldn’t share like something told in private and maybe a cold.  But, as a general rule we should be people who love to share.  And that is where I need your help.

Since Grits started in March of 2020, lots of folks have been reading Grits.  Through our church email list, the Grits Facebook page, and through the gritswithgrace.com blog, people have been reading.  I want you know just how incredible I think that is.  My goal is to be an encourager and maybe even make you smile.  But most importantly, I want to share a big truth that helps us as we do life…together.  

So, that is where you come in. I am wondering if you would be willing to share Grits with those in your world. The guy who wrote Hebrews (great name for a coffee shop by the way) said that we should do good things and share because God is pleased with that.  That might even apply to Grits.  Sign up for the blog at http://www.gritswithgrace.com, share on Facebook, or share in an email, it’s all sharing a word of encouragement. 

Something happened a while back that I thought was so cool.  I was notified by email that someone had read one of the Grits’ stories and decided to start following the blog. That means every day they will get an email with that day’s story.  Sometimes, people just stumble onto the Grits blog, who knows how that happens? But what made this so special was this someone was a cabdriver in Southampton, England.  What? Yup. And I thought that was cool.

Also a while back, my wife Judy checked (the blog tracks locations) and we have had Grits’ readers from several countries and from a chunk of the states here in America.  And it usually happens because someone searches and finds a story, or someone shares it.  So, would you be willing to make it a daily habit to share your Grits?  It isn’t about just getting more readers but rather, it is about maybe encouraging someone who needs a lift on any given day.  Together we can be encouragers and hey, the more the merrier.

Each year is a challenge, but I love the fact that God is bigger than any challenge we face.  I try and make that a regular theme as I write.  Life is pretty tough to go it alone and I believe that He is more than ready to walk with us.  So, thanks again for reading and thanks for sharing.  Oh, and by the way, for those of you who comment…thanks for that too. While some things change this is one that doesn’t. Always, “He’s got this.”Bro. Dewayne

Posted in communication, Family, love, loving others, marriage, priorities, Scripture

Valentine’s Day, Football and Love

 “I give you a new command: Love one another. Just as I have loved you, you are also to love one another.” John 13:34

Today is Valentine’s Day. It is a day that makes a whole lot of money for all the people who sell that kind of stuff—flowers, jewelry, eating, candy, gifts and all kinds of other stuff. I’m not sure who came up with the idea but like anything it has its good points and bad. If Valentine’s Day is just a day when you gotta do something special for  someone special—well that isn’t very meaningful. But, if it is a day when we “get to” do something special for someone special—well that is a game changer.

Did you know that Valentine’s Day is kinda like a game of football? Well, I think it is. You see, my wife Judy and I have been married for a pretty long time—almost 49 years. If the Lord is willing that means next year we will be celebrating 50 years of doing life together. Five decades—that is just unbelievable. Now there are two things I know. First, I believe we both would say it has been a great journey—not perfect, not by a long shot—but a great journey. Second, just like a football game has its up and downs—so does any marriage.

As I look back on the Valentine Days we have celebrated, it reads like a romantic barometer. There have been years when we have done a pretty good job celebrating this day. As an example, one year I remember I cooked a meal (imagine that) and set our living room up like a nice restaurant. I then had our daughter Sarah serve us dinner and then, get ready, we played some soft music and we danced. Trust me it was pretty romantic. Another time we went out to dinner and came home and watched one of our favorite movies, “Sleepless In Seattle.” That was a good one two.  The secret ingredient seemed to always have to do with quality time—when we made time for each other. You might want to write that one down.

And what was the biggest flop. Well, one year we decided that we really wouldn’t do anything for Valentine’s Day. It was probably one of those times when our pastor life led to a packed calendar and we were just wore out. So, I followed the plan, which was a bad one, and didn’t get a gift or a card. Like I said…bad. Well, anyway, I think Judy got a card for me card but I had nothing…did nothing. Judy was so disappointed. I should have known better. Did I mention bad? Well, the next day, I went and bought a gift and a card but it was way too late. hat day that I learned to never let Valentine’s Day be just another day. 

Like I said marriage and Valentine’s Day are a lot like a football game. No game is going to be perfect but trust me it is so important to win the game…to win the day and the best way to do that is to do your best and that day was not my best. It is not a matter of dollars and cents—it is often a matter of common sense. The one you chose and the one who chose you needs to know that you care—that you love them. So let’s be sure and not fumble the ball. The songwriter said that “love is a many splendid thing” and they were right. Sometimes the simplest thing can be the most splendid of things. 

God didn’t invent Valentine’s Day but He is the author of love and the creator of marriage. Today is an opportunity to show Him that we understand His love for us but showing our love for our special someone. So go ahead, grab the football today (metaphorically speaking) and run for the end zone. Not very good at romance? Me either but even in that department, we can know that, “He’s got this.”  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in communication, food, life, love, loving others, priorities, Scripture

Where’s the Beef?

 “All the Law and the Prophets depend on these two commands.” Matthew 22:40

Well, the Super Bowl has come and gone again. We all know that the Super Bowl really isn’t about football.  It is really about all the great food and of course, the great commercials. Did you know that thanks to the Super Bowl that wings are now one of the most expensive parts of the chicken? And the commercials are a show into themselves. Get this. This year a 30 second spot during the big game will set you back a whopping eight million dollars.  Can you believe that?

Super Bowl worthy or not one of my favorite commercials from years gone by showed a little old lady asking the question, “Where’s the beef.”  It was a poke at some of the hamburger chains whose burgers had gotten smaller and smaller till they had virtually disappeared. And that prompted the question, “Where’s the beef?” It seemed that the hamburger world had forgotten the main point of a burger was not the bun, not the pickle, not the sauce, nor the cheese. The main point of the burger was the burger. Forget that and you might as well start cooking and selling something else.

And do you know what?  It sure seems that in our crazy and busy world, it sure is easy to lose the burger—if you get my drift. Whether it is our family, or more specifically our marriages, our priorities, our values or a half dozen other important things—we seem bent on not keeping the main thing the main thing. I believe that is often most obvious in our faith. Think about yours just for a moment.  What is the most obvious thing on your faith list.  Religious rituals? Attending church? Do’s and Don’ts? Too often, even God, if He makes the list, is somewhere near the bottom. Isn’t that strange?

It would seem obvious that God has to be the center of our faith world. And by that I don’t mean just the fact that there is a God but that He impacts our world in a real and meaningful way. Jesus said something that is so important. When He was telling His followers the most important thing about being His follower, it was a four letter word—love. He said in John 13:35, “By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” Wow…all the religious stuff didn’t even make the cut—but love led the way.  In other words…the most important thing about our faith, besides simply believing in Jesus, is love.

Jesus, in Matthew 22:40, said that we are to love God and love people and then He said this, “All the Law and the Prophets depend on these two commands.” Don’t miss that. Love God, Love people—that is where the dust settles when it comes to who we are as Jesus people. It is far to easy to get lost in all the religious hoopla of today’s world but Jesus commands to keep love at the center of our God universe.

So…don’t let your burger get lost under the pickle. Make sure when people see you they see Jesus and make sure when they see Jesus in you they see His love. If we don’t keep the main thing the main thing—we will never be able to see the world changed for His good and glory. Instead of asking, “Where’s the beef?” we should be shouting, “Here’s the love!” Loving like He loves isn’t easy but it is always possible because, “He’s got this.”  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Holidays, life, love, New Year, Scripture, thankful, wisdom

Shrek…Once Too Many

 “If you love Me, obey My commandments.” John 15:13

It was just hilarious…till it wasn’t. In May of 2001 a film was released.  It was simply titled, “Shrek.” I don’t have time to go into the details but it was an animated film.  One of my friends asked me if I had seen it and I told him I had not.  He told me it was a must see.  So…I did. Well, the bottom line is it turned out to be one of the funniest films I have ever seen.  So, when I got to our small group at church, I joined the, “you gotta see it” club. We would sit around the room telling our favorite parts of the movie, all the while laughing till our sides hurt.  I watched it again and again and again.  And then…it happened.

A while later, I sat down in from of the television to watch it again. As the film started, as the credits rolled, I waited for the first hilarious scene.  It came and went but the most I could muster was a slight chuckle.  And so it was for the rest of the movie.  Somehow I had become so familiar with the movie that it had lost its appeal…its humor.  And, to this day, I watch Shrek with only a mild interest.  Like I said, it was funny, till it wasn’t.

I’m not sure how that happened but it might be like tuna casserole.  You see, when I was in the fifth grade our school served tuna casserole…which, at that time I liked…a lot. That day, I enjoyed the hefty helping they plopped on my plate but later that evening I got food poisoning.  It wasn’t pretty.  From then till now, I rarely if ever eat tuna casserole.  I guess I was scarred for life.  Now I didn’t get food poisoning from Shrek but you might say, rather than remembering what made me laugh…I remembered what didn’t.  So long Shrek!

Familiarity can be a great thing as long as it doesn’t keep us from loving and enjoying the things that matter.  The whole “familiarity breeds contempt thing” can be a dangerous separator.  Let’s make sure we guard the things that matter.  Whether it is your family, or your faith, or your career, make it a habit to look for the good while choosing to ignore the not so good.  Choose to remember why you love someone or something and never allow the dullness of familiarity to creep in. If you do keep it fresh, the result will be a renewing affection for the things that matter and a fleeting attraction for the things that don’t.

Jesus said, “if you love Me keep My commandments.”  He wasn’t trying to grow a “let’s keep the rules club” but rather a way to help us keep our love for Him ever before us. He wanted to help us keep our love like a fresh wind blowing through our lives and not like a funny line heard too many times in a movie. So, in 2025, let’s work to keep our love for Him like the first time I saw Shrek—ready to see it again—ready to experience it again. Of course, if you find yourself struggling with all of this, just remember how much He cares and His desire to help you do life.  You can rest assured that, “He’s got this.” Bro. Dewayne