Posted in Family, friends, gratitude, life, love, loving others, prayer, priorities, Scripture, Southern born, thankful

Daily Reminders

For this is how God loved the world: He gave His one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16

It was the great adventure.  I don’t know what your experiences with going to grandmother’s house were like…but mine, well, it was a great adventure.  Granddaddy and Grandmother lived in Gainesville, Florida and we lived on the west side of Jacksonville.  And, more than occasionally, we would load up in our car and drive down to Grandmother’s house.  It’s funny…it was never Granddaddy’s house…it always seemed to belong to her.

When we got there, we have our time of greeting and then, usually, there would be work to be done…at least for Daddy and me and our domain was the yard.  Grandmother had some beautiful flowers and my Daddy loved flowers too. We would walk around the yard admiring the handiwork of our Creator and planning what needed to be done.  And, before long, we would get to work.  There was weeding, mowing, picking up debris left over from the last Florida “frog strangler rain” and a host of other chores.  Fortunately, it wasn’t an all-day deal because there were adventures waiting.

Grandmother’s house was located on a main street but in a quiet neighborhood.  From the large front porch, with large white rockers, you could sit and watch the traffic go by.  If you went out the back door, there was the quiet world of the garden.  Beside the house was one of those narrow side streets that you only travelled if you knew it was there.  We went down that road and the blocks behind the house to collect coke bottles for the two-cent deposit.  Two cents meant two pieces of penny candy…what a bargain. Besides the bottles, there was another treasure trove that we visited every time we visited Grandmother.

I remember we would go into the backyard and there was trail of sorts going through some woods.  At the other end of the trail, on the next block, sat a small warehouse.  Today I suppose you would call it a large storage shed.  To my sisters and me it was heaven.  A man had a Jewel Tea franchise and that was where he stored his merchandise.  And right next to the building was a pile…a glorious pile of…stuff.  It was like having our own treasure chest except there wasn’t a chest.  It was all there, free, for the taking.

What was there?  Well, there were all kinds of items…things for the house or for personal care.  Honestly, you never knew what you were going to find…it was the great adventure.  It was not uncommon for there to be candy and snacks.  Now keep in mind this was in the sixties and everything was still wrapped up tight.  We would have a ball pilfering through the pile.  Sometimes of course there wouldn’t be anything but the anticipation of going to the Jewel Tea warehouse was so exciting.  The only thing better than finding bottles and collecting our two cents each, was finding the mother lode at the warehouse.

Perhaps you can’t imagine rummaging through a pile of boxes left outside.  Perhaps you can’t imagine opening some candy someone had discarded but somehow, someway, it just seemed ok and normal back then.  It really was the great adventure. We didn’t have a lot and because of that we didn’t get a lot so when you could find bottles and get two cents or when you could get something for free…well, it was pretty good day.

Somehow, I missed those days…days of simplicity…days of being satisfied with little and needing less.  These days we are surrounded by so much and yet today, enough never seems to be quite enough.  What used to fill our cups seems now to be but a drop in the bucket.  I think we have lost our way…detoured down a road of discontentment where sunrises are ignored, and a beautiful flower missed as we rush by.  Love notes from our Dearest Daddy, strategically placed along our paths, go unread.  We need to slow down, we need to smell the roses, we need to read the notes.

Today, this day, why don’t we make a conscious decision to find something simple and marvel in it again and why don’t we start with a simple fact.  And what fact is that?  It is that God so loved this broken, crazy world we call home, so much that He allowed, He sent, His Son into it and made a promise. The promise is anyone who believes in Him can have eternal life.  Think about that.  Loved by God with heaven thrown in…now that’s a good day.  And if you need a booster shot of “feel good,” just remember this.  No matter what comes your way today…well, He’s got it.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, life, love, loving others, prayer, Scripture, thankful, Trials

Mirror, Mirror – Tell Me True

Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus.” Romans 8:1

I often avoid them like the plague.  Mirrors and I have a complex relationship.  While I enjoy mirrors in a room…I don’t enjoy me in the mirrors.  They say that mirrors have a way of making a room look larger and brighter.  But it is a whole different story when I stand before one.  You see, the mirror reminds me of just how imperfect I am.  I look and see all the ways I need to be better and find myself not really loving the man in the mirror.

Sometimes that is not the case.  A friend of mind owned a home in Florida, and he was kind enough to let my family and me vacation there in the summer.  It was a beautiful home with a pool and a hot tub, and we always felt so special when we stayed there.  But there was one more thing that I liked a lot.  You see, in the master bedroom, there was a free-standing mirror. It was taller than me…though that isn’t saying a lot…and for some reason it made me look…taller and thinner.  Yup, that’s the truth.  I would stand in front of that mirror, and it made me look like I had grew an inch or two and dropped a few pounds. Now that is my kind of mirror.

It didn’t matter that I really hadn’t lost any weight.  What mattered was that is how the mirror made me feel.  I felt better about the man in the mirror…or at least that mirror. While I regularly avoid mirrors even today, that was one mirror I intentionally sought out.  Now the bottom line is life is filled with mirrors. First and foremost is the one in our own mind.  That is the most critical mirror of all.  Given half a chance we will find ourselves standing and staring at the mirror of our mind and discovering all the warts and flaws of our life.  It is not a good mirror to gaze into.

There is another mirror and that is the mirror of public opinion.  We live in a world where people are far too free with their opinion of others.  Opinions are fine…everyone has one but for some reason when it comes to our opinion of others, often they are critical and painful.  Because of that, if we are not careful, we walk in a room just waiting for someone to roll the mirror out…waiting for a reminder just how imperfect we are.

Our enemy the devil is the best at using mirrors.  He whispers in our ear constantly reminding us of all our flaws and reminding us that it must be simply impossible for God to love us.  Who could love a person like us and sadly, we often stand there in front of his mirror and listen to his cutting remarks.  Unfortunately, we even believe what he says…even when we know it is not true.  But like the mirror in Florida, there is a mirror that we can always trust and that always guides us in truth.  It is the mirror of God’s Word.

You see, the Bible, the oldest and most trusted of all sacred writings is not a book of bondage but rather a book of freedom.  It is a love note from our Dearest Daddy in heaven and in it He reminds us just how much He loves us and just how keen He is on us.  From Genesis to the Revelation, He speaks words over us of love and affirmation.  Ever wonder just how fond He is of you?  Well, fond enough to send His Son to a Roman cross to pay the price for our mistakes and sins.  Amazing.

So, it seems like we need to make a choice.  Which mirror will we choose to stand before?  Will we allow our minds to fill us with self-condemnation?  Will we let the mirror of public opinion determine our self-worth and self-image?  Will we continue to allow Satan to whisper his lies into our hearts and minds?  Or will we choose the mirror of God’s Word?   There is a letter that Paul wrote to the Christians in Rome.  In that letter, he tells them, “There is no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus.”  In other words, to the ones who have chosen to believe and follow Jesus, all charges are dropped. While we still won’t be perfect…we will be perfectly forgiven.  How about that?

As you journey through life today, choose to believe the mirror of God’s Word.  Oh my, He is so proud to call you His child. He has never regretted allowing you to be a part of His family.  Go ahead, read His love note, the Bible, you will find it written there. And if you listen carefully, you will hear Him whispering…not accusations but words of love.  Oh, and you might hear Him letting you know that no matter what, “He’s got this.” Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, friends, gratitude, life, love, loving others, Memorial Day, prayer, priorities, Scripture, thankful, Trials, wisdom

Bumped. Bruised. Battered.

When He saw the crowds, He felt compassion for them.”  Matthew 9:36

It was the week before Memorial Day.  Well, believe it or not, I have started exercising again.  For the last six weeks, I have been walking a couple of miles five times a week. To keep it interesting, I try and walk different routes.  So, on the Thursday before Memorial Day, I decided to walk in our local cemetery.  It is quite large, and I had a route picked out that was about nine tenths of a mile long.  I would do two laps and then part of another to get my two miles in.

I like walking in the cemetery because of all the stories that are told on the various headstones. It is almost like walking through a large library with each headstone representing the book of a person’s life.  The length of life and the things they valued are often shown. Some have many details and others leave that up to the living to figure it out. However, on that particular Thursday, I noticed that many of the graves were marked with an American flag…the symbol of our great country.  These were largely on the graves of those who had served their country.  There were dozens and dozens, and I found my eyes drawn to them…and what they represented.

It was then that I noticed something.  While many of the flags were pointed straight to the sky above…others were not.  Some were bumped and haphazardly pointed someplace besides up.  They had been hit by something…whether a careless foot or lawnmower.  Others had been knocked completely down and lay in the grass and dirt…someplace they were never intended to be and then some had become victims of the mower’s blade and lay tattered. As I walked something began to stir in me.  It occurred to me that someone should do something.  It just wasn’t right.  And then it also occurred that that someone was me.

So, as I walked, I began straightening some, replanting others and gathering the shredded remains of others.  Yes, it did require some time, it did require some detours, but it was worth every minute.  It simply was the right thing to do.  On Saturday, I found myself again back at the cemetery and once again straightening, replanting and gathering shreds to be property disposed of later.  It was right and it felt right.  When I once again entered the cemetery that Memorial Day Monday, I looked at the flags and felt a good sense of pride that I had made a difference…not to all but to some.  And then it hit me.

In a moment of time, I didn’t see flags but I saw people. I realized that all around me were people that had been bumped, bruised, and battered.  And I began to wonder what could I do to help them?  I know that often there isn’t a fix…certainly not one as easy as picking up or straightening up a flag in a cemetery but maybe – just maybe, a kind word or action could help the wounded, the bruised, and the bumped have a better day.

So, today I write a story, but I am also writing a reminder to me, to you, to all of us.  The reminder is to look around with seeing eyes and look for the wounded and the hurting and extend a hand, a hug, or a heart.  And who knows, another day when you see that person you may see their step is a little lighter and their smile a little brighter…because you took the time to straighten the bumped, replant the bruised, and maybe help pick up the pieces of a broken life.  It is probably risky, and may be costly, but trust me it will be worth it.

Jesus was so good at this.  One time He was coming ashore after a ride across a lake, and he was greeted by a whole crowd of bumped, bruised, and battered people and the Bible simply says, “When He saw the people, He had compassion on them.” He loved them, touched them, and sometimes even served them lunch.  He simply couldn’t leave them the way they were…love wouldn’t allow it.  If you are a Jesus follower…and even if you are not…love demands that we act. Love demands that we show a little kindness.  Sound challenging?  It is but know this…that God you believe in or at least want to believe in is just waiting to help.  Trust me…He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, loving others, prayer, priorities, Scripture, thankful, wisdom

At the Door

Look! I stand at the door and knock. If you hear My voice and open the door, I will come in, and we will share a meal together as friends.” Revelation 3:20

My doorbell can talk.  We are blessed at 217.  The original part of the house is well over a hundred years old. Back in those days it had a couple of bedrooms, a kitchen, a bathroom and probably a dining room.  Well, at the end of World War II a family bought it and totally remodeled it.  They added a living room, a couple more bedrooms and a breakfast area.  They took it from wood siding to brick and added a new front and rear entrance. And that is where my talking doorbell comes in.

I’ve always heard that backdoor friends are best and at our house that is the door we use and most of our guests use.  The front door is nice to look at, but it pretty much sits there looking pretty.  But just in case someone wants to use it, we have a doorbell there and at the backdoor.  Well, I’m not sure how it works but when that occasional someone comes to the front door and mashes the doorbell, inside we get a ding-dong sound.  But, when someone comes to the backdoor, we get a ding and skip the dong.  It’s a nice way to know which door to go to…if we can remember which is which.

For whatever reason, sometimes we don’t hear the doorbell, but we have a backup system.  On the front door we have a knocker and in the event, we don’t respond quickly enough, we get a rap, rap, rap. The back door is just a little more old-fashioned.  There the backup is a knock, knock, knock.  The important thing is that we know someone is at the door and would like to come in.

There is a scripture in the New Testament part of the Christian Bible that talks about knocking at the door.  It is found in the book of the Revelation, and it describes Jesus standing at a door and He is knocking…desiring to come in.  And the verse also says that if we are willing to open that door He would like to come in and have a visit.  For some folks, perhaps His visit would be for the first time.  He is saying, “Let Me come and be a part of your life.” For others, it is like a good friend coming for a visit—you know a cup of coffee and a piece of pie kind of visit.  Either way, He is courteous enough to wait for us to respond.

In today’s world, unannounced guests are not too common. In fact, show up unannounced and you might get a strange look or two.  But in the time of Jesus, guests are always expected and always welcomed.  It is just the way that it was.  In our busy, hurry-up world, we are often too busy to take the time for a visit—even from a man like Jesus.  Each time He knocks on the door, He brings more than He takes.  He isn’t there to bother but to love. He isn’t there to judge but to bless.  It is one visit you don’t want to miss.

I know each of us at one time or another, deliberately ignore the door.  We are either too tired, too busy, or too something else.  But the next time you hear the doorbell of your life, the next time you hear the knock, knock, knock at the door of life, I hope you will go and see who is standing there.  It just might be Jesus and a visit from Him is always worth the time.  Maybe you can settle down in the living room and chat a while…maybe share a few worries or concerns.  And then, because it is just what he does, He will smile and tell us not to worry because, as always, “He’s got this.” Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, forgiveness, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, prayer, Scripture, thankful, Trials

The Owner’s Closet

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends You and lead me along the path of everlasting life.” Psalm 139:23-24

It’s the one place.  My wife Judy is a really smart person and one day she proved that so clearly.  The place where we live has a two-bedroom apartment over the garage.  Off and on through the years, various members of the tribe have stayed there but finally it was just sitting empty.  Not only was it not earning its keep…it was costing us.  It has its own utilities so every month we wrote a check.  And then Judy had a great idea.  She researched and found out there was a pretty new company called Airbnb. It helps owners of properties rent them out as a short-term vacation type rental.  She wanted to give it a try…and she did.

On a shoestring budget and by watching several YouTube videos she turned that little apartment into a beautiful short-term rental.  I told her it wouldn’t work.  A couple of businessmen who attend our church told her it wouldn’t work.  After all, who comes to Harrisburg…a small town in Southern Illinois.  Well, we were all wrong and she was all right. Since 2016 when she opened for business, hundreds have stayed and instead of draining the check book, it now helps supplement our income.  Amazing.

People, book the place for a fee and we give them full access to the property.  They get the apartment, and trust me…it is very nice.  They also get to enjoy our beautiful garden (another Judy thing), the hot tub, and a nice patio area.  It is quite the deal if I say so myself.  Like I said…Judy had a really good idea. However, there is one place, one small room that the guests don’t have access to…the owner’s closet.

You see, in the hallway of the apartment, there is a small walk-in closet that we keep locked. No matter how much they pay, they can’t go in there. They can have everything else…but not that. No, nada, period.  Why?  Well…there are a couple of reasons but the main one is that it is filled with owner stuff.  It’s the storage closet where extra linens, cleaning supplies, mops, cleaning rags, decorations, things we don’t need and well, just things. If the guests were to see it, they definitely wouldn’t be impressed.  They might even say, “How can the rest of the place look so beautiful, and this look so…boring?”  And they would be right and that is why it is locked.

Every short-term rental that I have stayed in has an owner’s closet and I am sure none of them look as nice as the rental itself.  It’s just the nature of the beast.  But what about this?  What about our lives?  Do you have an owner’s closet in your life that no one, I mean no one, is welcome to open…to enter?  Your spouse? Nope. Your children? Nope. Your friends? Nope. Your parents? Nope.  God? Not even God.  Maybe especially not God. While the truth is all of us have that secret place, we need to know it can be a dangerous thing. When we are tempted to hide things, well, let’s just say bad things can grow in the dark.

Perhaps it is time we have the courage to unlock the door and let a little light in.  I know it can be difficult but as long as the door is locked, we won’t, we can’t change what’s inside. The best place to start is to invite God in.  If you are one of His kids, or especially if you aren’t, He won’t be surprised because He already knows everything.  In Psalm 139:23-24, a Book in the Jewish and Christian Bible, it says, “Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends You and lead me along the path of everlasting life.”

Now that is just some great advice. Remember this…if bad things grow in the dark…bad things die in the light. If we will just have the courage to unlock the door, open the door, and even flip on the light switch…well, healing can begin, and help will be on the way.  Why not take that giant step today?  As you reach out with the key and slip it into the lock and turn the knob on the door, just know this.  He is there with you, and He will help you all the way.  He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, forgiveness, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, loving others, prayer, Scripture, thankful

Thermostats

Adopt the same attitude as that of Christ Jesus.” Philippians 2:5

It just looked hot.  The other day I was lying on the couch in my living room. It is one of those nice long couches with plenty of room.  Even though I am not extremely tall, you might say, “height challenged,” it’s nice to know there is room to spare.  Our couch sits in front of a bay window, so I had a nice view of the trees outside and the clear blue summer sky.  It was good. I knew from a thermometer that registers the outside temperature that it was hot outside…really hot.  And, as I was lying there, I was just thinking how grateful I was for the guy who invented air conditioners.  Air conditioning is one of those things we take for granted and having been raised down south with only a window fan…well, let’s just say I’m grateful.

We are blessed at our house to have central air conditioning.  I have this thingy on the wall called a thermostat and it talks to my air conditioning…they are good friends and speak their own special language.  So, I tell the thermostat what temperature I like, and it tells the air conditioning. When it is needed, the thermostat prods the air conditioning and says, “Hey, we need some cool air” and just like that he fires up (no pun intended) and cools the room down.  It is a great relationship. Both are needed and I am grateful for both.

Now the thermometer and the thermostat are not the same thing.  You see the thermometer simply tells me the temperature, but it can’t do anything about it.  I could tell the thermometer, “Hey, I’m hot,” but all it can do is confirm the truth.  The thermostat on the other hand, has the ability to do something about it…and it does.  One instrument tells the condition of the room but the other has the ability to control the condition of the room.  How about that?

So, have you ever wondered if you are a thermometer or a thermostat?  Well, probably not, but the truth is all of us at one time or another is one or the other.  We find ourselves in a room of people and soon there is a discussion that goes south, and the temperature starts to rise.  If we are thermometers all we do is reflect the temperature and watch it rise. But if we are thermostats, we can help control the temperature with wise words and kind actions and maybe just maybe keep friends, friends.

Jesus was a great thermostat.  The four Books that talk about Him (Matthew, Mark, Luke and John) are filled with great examples. One time some rock chucking religious people wanted to stone a woman because she had sinned.  They asked Jesus what He thought and He told them OK but the person without sin had to cast the first rock.  Boy, that cooled things off.  One by one the rock chucker’s stepped away till it was only He and the woman left. He told her he wasn’t going to condemn her and invited her to go and sin no more.  Amazing.

Today, especially in these days, we need to be thermostats.  Every day there are situations that need a good thermostat and we Jesus’ people need to rise to the occasion.  Always be ready to set your thermostat to grace and then spread it around. Anybody can start a fire, or a fight or raise the temperature in a situation.  Anyone can reflect the temperature, but we are called to do more.  We are called to be like Jesus.

Paul, one of the guys who wrote the New Testament, said, “Adopt the same attitude as that of Christ Jesus.”  And what would that be?  It was His willingness to always go last instead of first. It was His willingness to forgive and not condemn.  It was His willingness to love the loveless, touch the untouchable, and care for the most unlikely.  It was being a thermostat.  I know that’s not always easy. It’s easier to tell a thermostat what to do than be one!  But don’t worry, God is ready and willing to help.  He loves it when His kids act like His Son.  No doubt…He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, loving others, Scripture, thankful

Learning to Speak Love

Remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how He Himself said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’” Acts 20:35b

It was, well, amazing.  I like to receive presents.  I love to receive presents.  Some guy wrote a book about the five love languages and basically, he said that everyone has at least one love language.  If you want to “ring someone’s bell” or “top off their love tank”, you do it by speaking their love language.  Well, my two primary love languages are gifts and words of affirmation.  Every time one of you leaves a kind comment about Grits, the nozzle goes in my love tank and fills it up.  How about that?

Well, my other love language is this gift thing.  When someone gives me something, it just rings my bell.  Several years ago, a friend visited Gettysburg and brought me back a set of coasters.  It was totally unexpected, and it just rang my bell.  He probably thought, “What’s the deal, dude?  It is only a set of coasters.” But no, it was more.  It said, “I thought of you.”  And, several years later it still brings a smile to my face.  We have a couple of good friends that like to travel, and they often bring me a souvenir of their travels and it is always blesses me. Boom—a full love tank.

Well, something happened last year that was pretty awesome.  We have a family who is part of our church family, and they are just a special group of people.  It is hard to put a finger on it but words like authentic and caring come to mind.  Well, after church one day, the mom in this family came up to me and was just beaming—and I mean beaming with joy and excitement. Her entire countenance said, “Something good had happened.”  I wasn’t sure what it was, but I couldn’t wait to hear what it was.  I was in for a surprise.

Here is what tumbled out of her mouth.  “We bought you something and I couldn’t wait to tell you.  I know I was supposed to wait but I just couldn’t.  I saw this on Facebook and said, “We have to buy this for Bro. Dewayne.”  She bubbled and bubbled, and I was in awe.  The gift was the “Fingerprint” of God.  It was a print in the shape of a fingerprint and the fingerprint was made from a scripture from each book in the Bible.  It sounded amazing and when it came in and they gave it to me, it was.  It will soon have a home in my church office, and it will have a story…this story.

You see, the gift really was amazing, but the unseen gift was equally so.  What was the unseen gift?  It was their—her—unbridled, unlimited joy and enthusiasm in not “getting” a gift but “giving” one.  Her joy in giving this special print to me, her friend, and her pastor, touched me and taught me.  It touched me that this special family made a sacrifice and bought me this gift.  It taught me that just like Jesus said, “It is more blessed to give than to receive.”  I have heard that verse for many, many years and have seen it on display at different levels.  But this time…this act of love taught me what it really means.

I have to wonder if this is what it is like when a person comes to follow Jesus for the first time.  I mean the Bible says God throws a party. The Bible says that all heaven breaks loose when someone comes home.  I can just imagine the smile on Jesus’ face when a person He loves and died for finally gets it and trusts Him.  I bet it looks at least something like the face of this family and especially my friend who shared the news with me, “We bought you something.”  We want to..wait for it…not get but give.  Amazing.

Though I love to travel and try and go to Africa once a year, I have always struggled with learning a new language.  But I wonder if that might need to change?  Maybe today, maybe this week, maybe I, maybe you, need to learn a new language.  No, I’m not talking Swahili—I’m talking about someone’s love language.  Someone in your world, your spouse, your kids, your neighbor ,or maybe someone else.  Learn what tops their love tank and do it.

The guy who wrote the book says the love languages are gifts, words of affirmation, acts of service, physical touch, and quality time. Why not learn and practice someone’s love language today?  If you are like me and struggle with learning (I can barely speak English), just ask the Father for a little help.  He will be more than glad to help you.  He loves it when His kids can speak love.  Yup…He’s got that too.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, fear, Grace, gratitude, life, love, loving others, Military memories, prayer, priorities, Scripture, Southern born, sovereignty of God, thankful, Trials

Daddy’s Heart Attack

We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God, who are called according to His purpose.” Romans 8:28

Thanks, Dad…for the heart attack. It was back in 1976, June 26th to be specific, that I married Judy Allen.  She was a Georgia peach that was quite the catch.  I met her when I walked into a strange, new church on a Wednesday night. I entered the side door and boom—there she was.  Standing in a circle of ordinary young ladies, this young lady was anything but.  Then, there was a phone call, a date and well, here we are forty-six years…she is still quite the catch, we are still in love, and we are still grateful for a God who has a plan.

I was talking with Judy the other day and said, “What if we had never met?” I honestly cannot fathom my life without her…but what if?  It was really a strange set of circumstances that got us together.  I was in the Air Force and my Daddy had a pretty major heart attack while I was home on leave.  It sure changed our Christmas plans, but it also changed my life.  My Momma, and don’t ask me how since this was way before the internet and smart phones, found out through the Red Cross that the Air Force would sometimes grant a “humanitarian reassignment” to airmen to the base nearest their home.  The conditions were strict, and the odds were long, but we (Momma and I) decided we should give it a shot.

It required all kinds of statements from the doctors and a bunch of other stuff that I don’t even remember.  At the time I was stationed at Minot AFB in North Dakota and trust me that is a long way from home.  Anyway, we applied and then one day I received a call from Base Personnel letting me know that my request had been approved and I was being reassigned to Moody AFB in Valdosta, Georgia. Soon, it was so long Minot and hello Moody.  I arrived at my new base in April of 1973.  I would drive home every weekend (about two hours) to see family and friends and come back Sunday evening.

Gratefully, God allowed my Daddy to live till midsummer of the next year when He decided heaven was better than here.  Of course, his leaving changed everything. I think my Momma went to stay with one of my brothers or sisters for a while and suddenly there wasn’t as much reason to go home.  I was a regular church goer, but it really wasn’t my desire to go to church that Wednesday night as much as it was…boredom.  Valdosta wasn’t a big town and Moody wasn’t a big airbase, so I just needed something to do.  And, as they say, the rest is history.

Which leads to my opening line…Daddy’s heart attack.  If it hadn’t had been for that and my Momma’s persistence, well, I would have stayed in Minot and probably froze to death. Smile. I would have never met Judy, there would not have been our three precious daughters and hence no eight grandchildren.  And, honestly, I probably wouldn’t be pastoring and wouldn’t be writing this today.  But God is a God of infinite details and design.  He tells us in the Bible that every day of our lives is planned before a single one of them is lived.  I like that…a lot.

He also teaches us that for those who love Him and are called by Him, He can take anything and everything and bring good out of it.  No, not everything is good…not even close and that isn’t what He said.  He said He can bring good and in the case of my Daddy’s heart attack, my life path is part of that good.  Have you ever thought of life that way?  Can you think of a situation where God did that for you?  I bet you can. You see, God is good, God is faithful, and God can be trusted.

One day I will see my Daddy again…in heaven.  I’ll probably chat with him and ask if he ever thought about the good that God brought about because of his heart attack.  And then, well, I’ll tell him all about Judy (if she isn’t there yet) and his great grandkids.  It’s gonna be a great reunion.  Till then, I hope I remember to trust my heavenly Dearest Daddy each day, and know that no matter what, no matter how big…He’s got this.  Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, Scripture, thankful, Trials

Walking Together

Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their efforts. For if either falls, his companion can lift him up; but pity the one who falls without another to lift him up.” Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

“Love Will Keep Us Together.”  It is one of our songs from the 70’s and it has been a way of living for us.  We sleep in the same bedroom in the same bed.  We eat our meals together.  We go out and eat together.  We watch television…mostly together.  We travel together…doing vacations…together.  We are a together kind of couple.  The old saying goes, “the family that prays together, stays together” and I do believe there is truth in that statement. A nationally known speaker said that 80 percent of couples who pray together stay together.  Interesting…if nothing else.

Well, this week my wife Judy and I carried this together thing to a new level.  Tuesday of this week, after a week of being ill with traveler’s disease (there’s a Grits story on that), I began feeling a little puny.  As the day went on, I felt worse.  Of all days, it was Judy’s birthday, and she had a lunch party with several of her friends so we didn’t see each other till after I got home from work.  So, I walked in, and she was sitting at her desk. I think I spoke first and said I just wasn’t feeling good, and she responded with, “I don’t feel good either.”  We decided to postpone our birthday dinner plans and sat around each progressively feeling worse.

Being a COVID veteran, I had my suspicions but didn’t say much but the night and the next morning said it all.  We both tossed and turned, got hot and then cold, had headaches (her’s was mega) and body aches. I got up first and felt just miserable and then Judy came in.  Now Judy is one of those folks who rarely gets sick and rarely complains.  She came into my office and simply said, “I feel terrible. We need to go the doctor.”  Well, she took a home COVID test and it was a clear positive.  The long and short of it all, we both had COVID, and it was one more thing we did together.

I told her I was grateful she was sick with me.  Let me explain. First, because I didn’t have to walk this alone and, second, I knew she could identify with how I felt.  Her body hurt like mine.  When I had COVID over year ago she was sympathetic but this time she empathic.  What is the difference?  Think of it this way.  If a person on the shore sees a person struggling in water and throws them a life preserver…they are sympathetic. But when that same person jumps into the water and struggles with that person…they are empathetic.

Over the last forty-six years of marriage (we celebrate that on June 26th) we have had plenty to celebrate but it occurred to me that we sometimes miss reasons to “tip our glass.”  This might be one of those.  We walked the COVID valley together, caring for one another, helping one another.  We walked the dark road each shining light on the other’s path.  That is love and frankly, that is a little Jesus too. It probably is a great example of Proverbs 4:9-10, “Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their efforts. 10. For if either falls, his companion can lift him up; but pity the one who falls without another to lift him up.” It’s true in life, it’s true in marriage and it is true in COVID.

So, there you go.  It is wonderful to have a wife and a friend like Judy to walk with me, but did you know there is something even better?  You see my Dearest Daddy in heaven walks with me too.  Honestly, I felt so bad I couldn’t even think about praying but that is ok because the Bible teaches that the God’s Holy Spirit was praying on my behalf.  And, the Bible also says that Jesus is constantly interceding for us too.  Talk about a prayer team.  That might be why I just know that if I listened, I would hear the sweet whisperer whispering, “Don’t worry, son, We’ve got this!” Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Father's Day, friends, Grace, life, love, loving others, Military memories, prayer, priorities, Scripture, Southern born, thankful, Trials

Thanks, Daddy…and Momma

Children, obey your parents because you belong to the Lord, for this is the right thing to do. “Honor your father and mother.” This is the first commandment with a promise.” Ephesians 6:1-2

This Sunday is Father’s Day, and it causes me to remember.  These days, I think it happens somewhere around a person’s 11th birthday. But back when I was a boy about to become a young man, it happened when I was 13 or 14.  When you are younger it seems you notice more of the things that Daddy and Momma’s do.  You appreciate the fact that that they do the ordinary things…the everyday things.

Things like washing clothes and cooking supper.  Things like ironing your shirts and cleaning the house.  Things like taking you fishing after a long day at work and teaching you the value of work.  Things like providing a place for you to sleep at night and knowing you were safe.  And, yes, things like showing you what two married people are supposed to look like…live like.

However, right before you take the leap into your teen years, something happens.  Suddenly enough is not enough.  Suddenly you know more—especially more than your parents.  Then you spend more than a few years not being appreciative, but rather telling them and anyone who would listen how hard things are “where I live.”  The fact that it was the sixties and seventies didn’t help.  It seemed that everyone around me was doing their own thing but all I could do was my Daddy’s thing.  Whatever he said, went, and that’s just the way it was. And yes, what Momma said went too.

When I was eighteen and stepped onto a plane to fly to basic training in the Air Force something began to click.  The things that Daddy taught me began to make sense.  All those “yes, sirs” and “yes, ma’am’s” that the Air Force required came easy for me because that’s the way I was raised.  When the call came to “get up, get up,” well that came easy too because I had a Daddy and a Momma who thought I didn’t need to lay in bed all day.  And going to work…second nature.  My Daddy demonstrated that year after year and by example taught me a strong work ethic.

Largely because of the times they said, “Because I said so” and set boundaries and enforced them, well, I’ve never woke up with a hangover, never spent a night (or an hour) in jail and have never been fired from a job. As I look back from my six and a half decades viewpoint (uh, plus three for good measure), I realize that my two incredible parents were right after all.  And I may, no I didn’t, appreciate it at the time but they saved me from a lot of regrets and consequences.

It is safe to say that time changes our viewpoint and as I sit here today mashing keys and writing, I realize just how blessed I have been.  My Daddy was quite the ordinary guy, but that is exactly what made him extraordinary.  He wasn’t perfect and gratefully he didn’t expect me to be either, but he did teach me respect for him and for others.  For 46 years I have respected the woman I am married to because he taught me to respect my Momma.  He (with a lot of help from God) helped me be the man I am today and for that I will be eternally grateful.

God chose to take my Daddy to heaven when I was only twenty years old…before he could meet my wife, my kids, and their kids.  I remember the summer Sunday morning we found him in bed. Sometime in the early, early morning he had slipped away from us and made the trek to heaven.  I’m glad I will see him again someday.  I’m not sure how all of this works but maybe, just maybe I will get to introduce him to my sweet wife and family.  What a day that will be for sure.

So, thanks Daddy, and Momma, for all you did for me…for the love and the sacrifices you made for me and the rest of the tribe.  And Grits family, remember to honor your father and mother, just like God says in His word.  It’s the first command with a promise and I promise you won’t regret it.  And, if you find that hard because of some very difficult memories and scars left from actions best not done, or words best not spoken, try and reach into God’s grace bucket and sling some around.  If you are a Jesus follower, your Dearest Daddy in heaven would like that and He’s even willing to help. As always, He’s got that…and this. Bro. Dewayne