Ephesians 4:32 – Grits with Grace

Family, fear, forgiveness, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, loving others, prayer, school days, Scripture, thankful, Trials

I Hated Him

Posted on July 26, 2024July 20, 2024 by Dewayne Taylor

And be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving one another, just as God also forgave you in Christ.” Ephesians 4:32

His name was Richard Jackson and I hated him. I know, I know…hate is a strong word, and you aren’t supposed to hate someone or anyone. But lying is wrong too and the truth is…I hated him. Besides all that I was in the eighth grade, so it was a long time ago. I’ve wanted to write this story before, but I’ve always put it off. Not anymore.

Anyone who knows anything can tell you that junior high, or middle school as they call it now, can be difficult…and mine was. I never was in the cool crowd at school…I just didn’t make the cut. And add to that I was a little too short and a little too pudgy and I guess that just made me a target. Richard Jackson wasn’t in the cool group either he was in that nether land where people go who aren’t nerdy but aren’t cool either. In another world, Richard Jackson would be a target like me…but he wasn’t.

Richard Jackson wasn’t a target because he was the one who targeted others. By a twist of fate, he was big, real big. I’m not sure if he was big because of his DNA or the fact that he probably spent too many years in the eighth grade. Regardless, he was big and for whatever reason, when he looked for someone to push around and bully, he found me. We didn’t share classes, we didn’t live in the same neighborhood, and we sure didn’t go to the same church. Come to think about it, I’m sure Richard Jackson didn’t go to church.

Anyway, Richard Jackson, for most of my eighth-grade year made it his business to make me miserable. He would push and shove and threaten me almost daily. To make matters worse, Richard Jackson had a lackey who would hang around him. If Richard Jackson was big, Mark Williams wasn’t. He was skinny, almost scrawny, but all that didn’t matter because he belonged to Richard Jackson. Well, Richard Jackson decided that Mark Williams should beat me up and one day he said just that. He promised to ride my bus and get off at my stop and pummel me. That was a long day as I waited all day to get beat up.

Well, I got on the bus, they got on the bus and when it came to my bus stop…we all got off. Richard Jackson instantly started in on me and at the same time encouraged his lackey to hit me. Well, he did, square on the mouth and then we took to the ground and wrestled around a bit before it was all over. Well, every day for months I would take my tongue and feel the large knot on my lip. Every day for months I relived those few moments trying to make the outcome different. It never was. To this day, I hate that day.

I think, though I am not sure, that soon after this Richard Jackson lightened up some. In fact, by the time high school rolled around he was almost civil. His lackey Mark Williams went somewhere…maybe parole school for all I know. All I know is for a long time I allowed that day to define me. For a long time, I allowed the fear of another bully showing up to cause me to live in fear. And then finally, slowly, the fear disappeared but the scar remained.

As I write this, I still can feel the emotional pain that Richard Jackson and Mark Williams inflicted on me. And, honestly, it wouldn’t be too hard for me to hate them all over again but then I realize that wouldn’t accomplish anything. I’ve given them enough free rent in my brain already. Besides all that since those days I had another important day—I met a Man who loved me enough to die for me. I met a Man who forgave me of everything I had ever done wrong. I met a Man who said since I have forgiven you don’t you think you should forgive him…forgive them. And I realized He was right. If I didn’t, I would be no better than they were.

Is there a Richard Jackson or a Mark Williams in your past…or present? Is there a scar on your heart the size of Texas because someone decided to put it there? Maybe just maybe it is time to let it go. Maybe it is time to forgive. I was watching The Chosen last night and one of the big truths was Peter’s unwillingness to forgive Matthew and Matthew’s failure to own his sin. It was a powerful moment. You see, if we are the offender we need to own our part and if we are the offended—well, we need to let it go.

As I wrote this, I was amazed at the emotion that still lingers in my heart and in my memories and I realized this forgiveness thing isn’t as easy as it seems. But that’s ok because the One who asked me to forgive stands ready to help me to forgive. He stands there ready to help, whispering, “It’s ok, I’ve got this.” Bro. Dewayne

Family, fear, forgiveness, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, loving others, prayer, Scripture, Southern born, thankful, Trials

I Hated Him

Posted on July 13, 2022July 12, 2022 by Dewayne Taylor

And be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving one another, just as God also forgave you in Christ.” Ephesians 4:32

His name was Richard Jackson and I hated him. I know, I know…hate is a strong word, and you aren’t supposed to hate someone or anyone. But lying is wrong too and the truth is…I hated him. Besides all that I was in the eighth grade, so it was a long time ago and it was also before I decided to follow Jesus. I’ve wanted to write this story before, but I’ve always put it off…until today.

Anyone who knows anything can tell you that junior high, or middle school as they call it now, can be difficult…and mine was. I never was in the cool crowd at school…I just didn’t make the cut. And add to that I was a little too short and a little too pudgy and I guess that just made me a target. Richard Jackson wasn’t in the cool group either he was in that nether land where people go who aren’t really nerdy but aren’t cool either. In another world, Richard Jackson would be a target like me…but he wasn’t.

Well, I got on the bus, they got on the bus and when it came to my bus stop…we all got off. Richard Jackson instantly started in on me and at the same time encouraging his lackey to hit me. Well, he did, square on the mouth and then we took to the ground and wrestled around a bit before it was all over. Well, every day for months I would take my tongue and feel the large knot on my lip. Every day for months I relived those few moments trying to make the outcome different. It never was. To this day, I hate that day.

As I write this, I still can feel the emotional pain that Richard Jackson and Mark Williams inflicted on me. And, honestly, it wouldn’t be too hard for me to hate them all over again but then I realize that wouldn’t accomplish anything. I’ve given them enough free rent in my brain already. Besides all that since those days I had another important day—I met a Man who loved me enough to die for me. I met a man who forgave me of everything I had ever done wrong. I met a man who said since I have forgiven you don’t you think you should forgive him…forgive them. And I realized He was right. If I didn’t, I was no better than they were.

Is there a Richard Jackson or a Mark Williams in your past…for present? Is there a scar on your heart the size of Texas because someone decided to put it there? Maybe just maybe it is time to let it go. Maybe it is time to forgive. As I wrote this, I was amazed at the emotion that still lingers in my heart and in my memories and I realized this forgiveness thing isn’t as easy as it seems. But that’s ok because the One who asked me to forgive stands ready to help me to forgive. He stands there ready to help, whispering, “It’s ok, I’ve got this.” Bro. Dewayne

Family, forgiveness, gratitude, life, love, loving others, prayer, priorities, Scripture, sovereignty of God, thankful, Trials

Giants Among Us

Posted on September 28, 2021September 27, 2021 by Dewayne Taylor

Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” Ephesians 4:32

There are giants among us…we saw them. These giants were the massive redwoods of California, and they are the tallest and perhaps the largest trees on earth. They can grow up to 380 feet in height and up to 26 feet in diameter. Not only that, they can live up to 2,200 years. The giant redwoods are an evergreen tree only found in a narrow strip of coastal California and just north of the Oregon border.

The redwoods seem larger than life and that’s because they are. They are not the only giants around though. There are the humankind, but I’m not talking about their height or weight. I am talking about heroes—people with big hearts and brave souls. These amazing people do the most amazing things. They lay their lives on the line for their country, they put on a badge and go into dangerous situations for a few dollars a week. They charge into burning buildings when everyone else is trying to get out.

That is just a few for the list goes on and on. There are also other kinds of giants—larger in life in the quest for excellence, to change the world or perhaps, to be like Jesus. These are some of the people I admire the most—true spiritual giants. Over a couple of years ago I met one. I was amazed by her story.

It all started when we were invited over to a friend’s house for supper. When we arrived, we had the opportunity to meet her mother who lives with her. That is when I realized it probably wouldn’t be a normal evening. When her mom spoke to us you could tell she was struggling with her voice. Before long, she explained and that was the beginning of an incredible story.

She explained in 1950 when she was 19 years old, she was diagnosed with polio. If you know a little about those times, there was an epidemic of this terrible, dreaded disease. It struck without warning and without rhythm and that was the case here. It left this dear saint partially paralyzed and affected her vocal cords. I was enthralled with her story as she shared, they said she would never walk—but they were wrong.

Then she shared more and more of her story. When she was born (and remember this is around 1930) there were twins and she weighed less than two pounds. She was a fighter from the beginning and fight she did. Later, when she was eleven, she basically was put out to fend for herself and she did. She had a strong constitution and work ethic. I was amazed.

She married and had three miscarriages before giving birth to her daughter. She would end up having 21 surgeries for various reasons and lives with a colostomy. She has been told that she has cancer though they really can’t pinpoint the source. I know there are several things that I am leaving out but that is enough for you to get the picture. Her life has been difficult from the get-go but that is not the main story.

The most amazing story is her faith. Receiving Christ at a young age, her journey of faith has been strong and steady. Like Job, her love for God only grew deeper and stronger. She shared that evening how blessed she was that God had entrusted her with this suffering. From her lips poured words of praise for her Savior. Then came stories of incredible generosity to those in need—both physically and spiritually.

Judy and I both left that night refreshed as if we had drunk deeply from a cool spring. We were blessed, encouraged, and challenged by a saint who had given more than she took. She isn’t the only one. Over my almost four decades of pastoring, I have bumped into so many spiritual heroes. You had to bump into them because like most heroes, they don’t brag about their lives and stories.

When I left that night, I also left strengthened. It is instances like this that solidify my own faith. When I see and hear stories such as this one, it shouts to me, “God is real.” It also does one more thing. It causes me to examine the life story I am writing. When people read my life, what does it say about me…and about the God I serve?

Each one of us are writing a story and during this hot mess called life, we all have special opportunities to write a saga. The way we live, act, and speak will tell a tale. Hopefully it will be one of grace and kindness. Paul wrote in the Bible that we should be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.

That is a tall order, but God is in the business of filling tall orders. Why not take a moment and ask your Heavenly Father for a little, or maybe a lot, of help? Let Him know you’ve been treading water a lot these days and you could use a little rest. Don’t worry—He is ready and willing to help. He’s got this. Bro. Dewayne

Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” Ephesians 4:32
They seem larger than life. I am from a generation that deeply admires heroes—people who seem larger than life. They do the most amazing things. They lay their lives on the line for their country, the put on a badge and go into dangerous situations for a few dollars a week. They charge into burning buildings when everyone else is trying to get out. Those are just a very few…the list goes on and on. There are also other kinds of giants—-larger in life in the quest for excellence, to change the world or perhaps, to be like Jesus. These are some of the people I admire the most—true spiritual giants. A couple of years ago I met one. I was amazed by her story.

It all started when we were invited over to a friends house for supper. When we arrived we had the opportunity to meet her mother who lives with her. That is when I realized it probably wouldn’t be a normal evening.

When her mom spoke to us you could tell she was struggling with her voice. Before long, she explained and that was the beginning of an incredible story.

She explained in 1950 when she was 19 years old, she was diagnosed with polio. If you know a little about that time period, there was an epidemic of this terrible, dreaded disease. It struck without warning and without rhythm and that was the case here. It left this dear saint partially paralyzed and also affected her vocal cords. I was enthralled with her story as she shared they said she would never walk—but they were wrong.

Then she shared more and more her story. When she was born (and remember this is around 1930) there were twins and she weighed less than two pounds. She was a fighter from the beginning and fight she did. Later, when she was eleven, she basically was put out to fend for herself and she did. She had a strong constitution and work ethic. I was amazed.

She married and had three miscarriages before giving birth to her daughter. She would end up having 21 surgeries for various reasons and also lives with a colostomy. She has been told that she has cancer though they really can’t pinpoint the source. I know there are several things that I am leaving out but that is enough for you to get the picture. She life has been difficult from the get-go but that is not the main story.

The most amazing story is her faith. Receiving Christ at a young age, her journey of faith has been strong and steady. Instead of turning bitter, like Job, her love for God only grew deeper and stronger. She shared that evening how blessed she was that God had entrusted her with this suffering. From her lips poured words of praise for her Savior. Then came stories of incredible generosity to those in need—both physically and spiritually. It really was amazing.

Judy and I both left that night refreshed as if we had drunk deeply from a cool spring. We were blessed, encouraged and challenged by a saint who had given more than she took. She isn’t the only one. Over my almost four decades of pastoring, I have bumped into so many spiritual heroes. You had to bump into them because like most heroes, they don’t brag about their lives and stories.
When I left that night I also left strengthened. It is instances like this that solidify my own faith. When I see and hear stories such as this one, it shouts to me, “God is real.” It also does one more thing. It causes me to examine what kind of story am I writing. When people read my life, what does it say about me…and about the God I serve.

Each one of us are writing a story and during this hot mess called COVID-19, we all have special opportunities to write a saga. The way we live, act and speak will tell a tale. Hopefully it will be one of grace and kindness. Paul wrote in the Bible that we should be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.

That is a tall order but God is in the business of filling tall orders. Why not take a moment and ask your Heavenly Father for a little, or maybe a lot, of help. Let Him know you’ve been treading water a lot these days and you could use a little rest. Don’t worry—He is ready and willing to help. He’s got this.

Giants in the Land

Quote• Posted on August 14, 2020August 14, 2020 by Dewayne Taylor