Posted in communication, Family, friends, life, marriage, Scripture, thankful, travel

Wrong Kind of Dump

Above all, my brothers and sisters, do not swear, either by heaven or by earth or with any other oath. But let your “yes” mean “yes,” and your “no” mean “no,” so that you won’t fall under judgment.” James 5:12

We were just tootling along somewhere in Washington state. Not familiar with the term tootling? Well, you are probably more familiar than you think.  The word means to go or travel in a leisurely way.  For example, remember last week when you were going somewhere and the couple in front of you was driving fifteen miles an hour under the speed limit.  Yup…they were tootling.  Or maybe you were leaving a big event and the person in front of you was walking like they couldn’t? Yup…they were tootling.  Sometimes we call it being “out for a Sunday drive” or “strolling in the park” but the bottom line is, it’s tootling.

Well, we weren’t driving fifteen miles per hour under the speed limit but at the same time we weren’t in a hurry either. I was casually looking around and so was Judy. We would occasionally comment about this thing or that thing but mostly we were just enjoying the day and the drive.  We were tootling.  The area we were in had multiple campsites and RV parks.  It was a beautiful to tootle. As we tootled, we came upon an RV camp on my side of the road. We knew it was an RV park because it had one of those two sided signs—two boards hinged together that made a sorta tent.

Here is what it said, “RV Park. Dump. $5.  Well, I didn’t think too much about it because I knew it was letting people know that it was an RV Park and if it was time to dump your sewage or grey water you could do it there for five dollars. Well, just a few seconds after we drove past the sign, Judy spoke up and said, “That must really be a poor place since they called it a dump and it only cost five dollars. Well, I let it ride for just about a minute and then I explained it wasn’t talking about the condition of the park but rather the fact that you could dump your stuff there for five bucks. And then—best as I tried to avoid it—I laughed at her misinterpretation of the sign, and she laughed too.

I knew right away buried in there somewhere was a Grits story about communication. You see, I knew what they were saying but since Judy didn’t, she got a whole different meaning. To me they were advertising a service and a bargain, and she thought that the owners were so desperate they were willing to let anybody stay for just five bucks. Now stop for a minute and think just how often what we say or what we do is totally misunderstood. If we are honest, it is more than we want to admit. I know during my preaching years it was common for me to be unclear in what I was trying to say. Mostly it was just funny but a couple of times it was painful.

James, the half-brother of Jesus, said in the book he wrote in the Bible, “Above all, my brothers and sisters, do not swear, either by heaven or by earth or with any other oath. But let your “yes” mean “yes,” and your “no” mean “no,” so that you won’t fall under judgment.” In other words, be careful what you say, when you say it, and even how you say it. If our “misspeaks” end in a laugh that isn’t too bad but when it hurts—well, it hurts. Momma always told me to mind my manners and that included what I said. Well, our Dearest Daddy wants us to mind our mouths. The best part is He is always willing to help us do that.  You might say, “He’s got that” and you would be right. Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, friends, Grace, gratitude, life, love, loving others, Scripture, thankful, Trials

Mirror, Mirror – Tell Me True

Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus.” Romans 8:1

I often avoid them like the plague.  Mirrors and I have a complex relationship.  While I enjoy mirrors in a room…I don’t enjoy me in the mirrors.  They say that mirrors have a way of making a room look larger and brighter.  But it is a whole different story when I stand before one.  You see, the mirror reminds me of just how imperfect I am.  I look and see all the ways I need to be better and find myself not really loving the man in the mirror.

Sometimes that is not the case.  A friend of mine owned a home in Florida, and he was kind enough to let my family vacation there in the summer.  It was a beautiful home with a pool and a hot tub, and we always felt so special when we stayed there.  But there was one more thing that I liked a lot.  You see, in the master bedroom, there was a free-standing mirror. It was taller than me…though that isn’t saying a lot…and for some reason it made me look…taller and thinner.  Yup, that’s the truth.  I would stand in front of that mirror, and it made me look like I had grown an inch or two and dropped a few pounds. Now that is my kind of mirror.

It didn’t matter that I really hadn’t lost any weight.  What mattered was how the mirror made me feel.  I felt better about the man in the mirror…or at least that mirror. While I regularly avoid mirrors even today, that was one mirror I intentionally sought out.  Now the bottom line is life is filled with mirrors. First and foremost is the one in our own mind.  That is the most critical mirror of all.  Given half a chance we will find ourselves standing and staring at the mirror of our mind and discovering all the warts and flaws of our life.  It is not a good mirror to gaze into.

There is another mirror and that is the mirror of public opinion.  We live in a world where people are far too free with their opinion of others.  Opinions are fine…everyone has one but for some reason when it comes to our opinion of others, often they are critical and painful.  Because of that, if we are not careful, we walk in a room just waiting for someone to roll the mirror out…waiting for a reminder just how imperfect we are.

Our enemy the devil is the best at using mirrors.  He whispers in our ear constantly reminding us of all our flaws and reminding us that it must be simply impossible for God to love us.  Who could love a person like us and sadly, we often stand there in front of his mirror and listen to his cutting remarks.  Unfortunately, we even believe what he says…even when we know it is not true.  But unlike the mirror in Florida, there is a mirror that we can always trust and that always guides us in truth.  It is the mirror of God’s Word.

You see, the Bible, the oldest and most trusted of all sacred writings is not a book of bondage but rather a book of freedom.  It is a love note from our Dearest Daddy in heaven and in it He reminds us just how much He loves us and just how keen He is on us.  From Genesis to Revelation, He speaks words over us of love and affirmation.  Ever wonder just how fond He is of you?  Well, fond enough to send His Son to a Roman cross to pay the price for our mistakes and sins.  Amazing.

So, it seems like we need to make a choice.  Which mirror will we choose to stand before?  Will we allow our minds to fill us with self-condemnation?  Will we let the mirror of public opinion determine our self-worth and self-image?  Will we continue to allow Satan to whisper his lies into our hearts and minds?  Or will we choose the mirror of God’s Word?   There is a letter that Paul wrote to the Christians in Rome.  In that letter, he tells them, “There is no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus.”  In other words, to the ones who have chosen to believe and follow Jesus, all charges are dropped. While we still won’t be perfect…we will be perfectly forgiven.  How about that?

As you journey through life today, choose to believe the mirror of God’s Word.  Oh my, He is so proud to call you His child. He has never regretted allowing you to be a part of His family.  Go ahead, read His love note, the Bible, you will find it written there. And if you listen carefully, you will hear Him whispering…not accusations but words of love.  Oh, and you might hear Him letting you know that no matter what, “He’s got this.” Bro. Dewayne

Posted in Family, forgiveness, friends, Grace, Integrity, life, loving others, Scripture, Trials

Windshields and Words

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” Ephesians 4:29

Go figure.  It was about five years ago when it happened.  I was driving back from Evansville, Indiana and there was a school bus coming toward me. Of course, I didn’t think a thing about it…school busses come and go all the time.  Well, this one had a surprise waiting for me. Just about the time we met, in opposite lanes, of course, something came flying out of the bus.  To this day I don’t know what it was but whatever it was…it was big and heavy. It hit my windshield near the bottom and shattered it there.  In fact, it was so heavy, that it almost broken all the way through…there was even glass on my dash.

Well, needless to say, I was shocked.  I really wasn’t sure what had happened but it scared the pants off of me.  But then, I smiled.  You see when I bought the car it was, of course, used and the windshield had a couple of obvious defects.  First, it looked like it had been sandblasted and was covered with a zillion small pits.  Second, the top of the windshield was a medium to dark blue.  The deal had placed on those stickers on the outside and it stayed on long enough to leave a permanent oval-shaped shadow.  Being a perfectionist, both of these drove me nuts.

I wanted to replace the windshield but just couldn’t bring myself to do it and then when “it” happened, it was replaced courtesy of the insurance company…and that was why I smiled.  Oh, I guess I wish it hadn’t happened but since it did, I was grateful for the new windshield. 

The company did a great job installing the new glass and asked me to leave a review for their small town company…so I did.  Well, this week I received an email from my friends at Google congratulating me on the fact that over five hundred people had read my review and found it helpful.  Now who would have thought at a small town business that so many people would have read and reacted to my review.  It made me realize just how powerful and far reaching our words can be.

The Jesus part of the Bible, the New Testament, talks a lot about our words…mostly encouraging us to be careful what we say.  Long before Google, Jesus and the rest of the guys who wrote the New Testament realized the importance and power of words.  The bottom line was and is…be careful with what you say…it carries more impact than you realize.  Someone said, “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me.” It is a nice saying but simply not true.  Words can hurt a lot…trust me I know.

Paul said when he was writing to the church in Ephesus, “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” What great advice.  That review, depending on what I said, had the power to help or hurt and so do our words.  Let’s choose our words carefully.  If you find yourself at a loss of words—well, just asked the greatest Word Crafter ever…God…as always, “He’s got this.”

Posted in Family, food, forgiveness, Grace, gratitude, life, loving others, Scripture, Southern born, thankful, Trials

Eating Your Words

The one who reveals secrets is a constant gossip; avoid someone with a big mouth.” Proverbs 20:19

The more I chewed the bigger it got.  I have lots of food memories from growing up.  First you need to remember that I was born in the South and folks from the South have a whole different way of eating.  And trust me…that means it was good…mostly.  I can remember fried chicken Sunday dinners with green beans and mashed potatoes…the kind that didn’t come from a box but from a real potato.  A lot of Sundays we had pot roast with those same yummy potatoes and green beans. And “dinner on the grounds” at church was a potluck straight from heaven.

My mama was the biscuit queen.  You can’t imagine how good they were hot out of the oven.  While we did occasionally have desert, we really didn’t need it.  We would just take one of mama’s biscuits, slather it with butter and then pour cane syrup all over it.  Shoot-that-thing! You don’t know good if you’ve never had homemade biscuits and cane syrup.  Now with all that said, there were a few things we had that were a bit—different.

I remember I decided to try something new with peanut butter. It could have been that we were out of jelly but anyway I got the mayonnaise out of the refrigerator, smeared it on some bread and then loaded on the peanut butter.  Bam…just like that a new delicacy was born.  That became one of my favorites for years.  One day, though, I had one and then got the stomach flu and well, we parted ways. No pun intended.

We didn’t have a whole lot of candy growing up and I’ve always had a sweet tooth.  Somewhere along the journey I discovered the sugar bowl.  Did you know you can get a teaspoon full of sugar and put it in your mouth and it tastes like a candy bar?  Well, it probably didn’t taste like a Snickers, but it was plenty sweet.  You know what they say, “Necessity is the mother of invention.”

School lunches were always an adventure.  There were deviled egg sandwiches (awesome), deviled egg sandwiches with potted meat mixed in (not so awesome), potted meat sandwiches without deviled eggs (yuk) and finally Vienna sausages (uh, well, somewhat good).  You just never knew what mom was going to put in the lunch bag.  My all-time favorite was and is pimento cheese.  And then there was—tripe.

Tripe wasn’t a lunch item, it was always for supper.  Some of you may not have discovered the wonder of tripe or even know what it is.  Well, for those of you who don’t know tripe is cow’s stomach.  Yup and let me just tell you it was an experience.  It always smelled great cooking but eating it was a real challenge.  Mama usually cut it up in pretty small pieces, but you still had to get a sharp knife to get it down to bite size.  Now tripe was…chewy.  In fact, tripe was very chewy.  Which is why it never made it into the lunch bag—it took two hours to eat one small piece.  You see, the more you chewed it, the bigger it got! 

I’ve heard it said that celery is one of those negative calorie foods…it actually takes more calories to chew it and digest it than are in the food itself.  I think tripe must be one of those also.  In fact, I am sure there is a tripe diet somewhere out there.  You take a bite, chew for two hours and bam…lose two pounds.  Good, ole, tripe.  The supper of champions.

Did you know that tripe and gossip are first cousins?  No really. You mutter a few words about your friend and before you know it, you have yourself a belly full of trouble. Those few hurtful words just get bigger and more hurtful each time they are repeated. Feelings get hurt, relationships are broken and talk about a belly ache…oh yeah.  While the Bible doesn’t say much about tripe it does say a lot about gossip.  One of my favorites is Proverbs 20:19, “The one who reveals secrets is a constant gossip; avoid someone with a big mouth.”  How’s that for being straight to the point?

One of the best ways to avoid gossip is to remember a couple of things.  If the person you are telling isn’t part of the problem…don’t say it. Also, if you wouldn’t say something to a person’s face you shouldn’t share it behind their back.  Now the problem is, most of us just love a good piece of juicy gossip.  The Bible says, “A gossip’s words are like choice food that goes down to one’s innermost being.” That might be true but I know one more thing about tripe.  If it gets stuck in your throat you are in deep weeds.  That choice piece of gossip can get stuck too, and can cause heart breaking consequences.

Well, I gave up tripe a long time ago.  I guess I had enough when I was a kid.  I wish I could say I have totally given up gossip the same way.  I have found out given half-a-chance I can find myself saying, “Hey, did you hear…” and that tripe-like-sin is right back in my mouth.  We just need to be careful to keep it out of our mouth.  The good news is Jesus is more than willing to help if you ask.  He can handle all kind of things whether it be a tough piece of tripe stuck in the wrong place or a juicy piece of gossip right on your lips.  Just ask Him.  He will help…cause He’s got …even this.  Bro. Dewayne