Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye.” Matthew 7:5
I got to play God once…no, really. One evening, and it must be at least 15 years ago, I got to play God…or at least the voice of God. It was one of those evenings when you didn’t need air conditioning. It was about 10:30 at night and I was lying in bed. Next to the bed was a window and since it was such a nice evening it was open. It was so close that I could reach out and touch it. Because we live basically downtown in our small town, night noises are common. I hadn’t yet fallen asleep, so I was just lying and listening to the night sounds. Then I heard it.
The alley that runs right next to our property and our house is paved with oil and chip…a covering of small pieces of rock that gives a nice crunching sound when a car drives over. It is not an uncommon sound unless it is late at night and the car stops right next to your house. As soon as the car stopped, I could hear the sounds of giggles that can only belong to young teenage girls. I eased out of bed and knelt next to the open window. From my second-floor window I had a bird’s eye view of what was unfolding belong me.
Like the poem, The Night Before Christmas, I looked and “what to my wondering eyes did appear” not one, but two young teen girls gleefully covering my back yard in toilet paper. The young ladies attended the church where I pastored and one of their moms was driving the getaway car. I smiled a slow smile just wondering what to do with this. And then, it occurred to me. Since I kinda work for God why not speak for Him? So, I did.
From the raised window, and in my best God voice, I said, “This is God. What are you two girls doing?” Oh, my goodness…it was incredible. In an instant, both girls went into total panic mode. Paper rolls went flying, arms were flailing in the air and mom was racing the motor in the car. In total chaos, they both tried to get into the car at the same time. It was priceless. After several attempts they finally made it and off they went speeding down the alley. I was rolling on the floor.
Well, if I remember right, that was a Saturday night and the next morning at church I said something like, “Good morning, ladies. How are you today?” Their response was a combination of eyes wide open, eyebrows raised and a mischievous smile. I don’t remember saying anything more…except maybe in a sermon several weeks down the road. I mean, who could pass up an opportunity like that?
I think it was ok that night to do a kind of impersonation of God. My voice really isn’t deep enough but I gave it my best shot. Impersonating God is a very common occurrence…too many of us do it all the time. It usually isn’t a voice from a second story window but rather the voice of a judge speaking from the bench…pronouncing some sort of judgment on another poor soul. It seems we get pleasure from judging others. I think it might make us feel bigger while making them feel smaller.
It’s certainly not a new thing. The Bible is full of words and warnings about playing judge in place of God. My favorite is when Jesus uses an illustration about some guy who has a big log sticking out of his eye. That guy walks over to his buddy and says, “Hey dude…you need to get the splinter out of your eye.” Jesus was certainly the master storyteller and in this case His point was clear. Who are we to judge anybody when our faults are often bigger than theirs? And besides that, aren’t we supposed to leave the judging to the Judge? Uh, that would be a yes.
Well, if you are ever given the opportunity to use your God voice to scare a couple of young teens, aw, go for it. It was a blast. But the next time you are tempted to cast a stone or take a seat on the Judge’s seat…you might want to resist the urge. The same Bible that talks about leaving the judging to the Judge talks about if you judge others…you might just find yourself being judged by your peers. And some of them aren’t too kind. And if you’ve been judged, tried, and convicted by one of those unlawful judges don’t worry about it. There is only one Judge that matters, and He is on your side. So, rest easy…He’s got this.